How to ditch the dummy?

[Teamthree]

My LG is 4 months next Wednesday and after some gentle sleep training at around 3.5 months falls asleep on her own for every nap and at bedtime. We currently use white noise, a love to dream swaddle and a dummy. However her naps are still one sleep cycle long most of the time, and she wakes up multiple times in the night crying wanting her dummy. Last week she fell asleep on a fluke without the dummy and napped for 3 hours! And last night I managed to get her to sleep without the dummy (had to rock her to sleep after she cried and cried) and she slept wonderfully until her feed at 2am. So I'm pretty sure it's the dummy that's causing the problem. Has anyone got any experience of successfully getting rid of the dummy?

The dummy is not the problem. Being 4 months old is the problem.

I really would not ditch the dummy. Dummies are absolutely AMAZING as a no crying way to get baby sleeping independently, without your help.

Yes, it's a bit of a ball ache when you're in the dummy drop phase. But that won't last long and baby learns to reinsert own dummy fairly early (8 months ish).

The coming 4 ish months will involve much more parent input to get baby to sleep without a dummy. Plus loads more crying. And that involved (rocking, cuddling, bouncing, feeding to sleep) and crying will carry forward into the rest of the first (and second) year.

Whereas you teach independent sleep now with the dummy. Baby will learn to sleep with dummy as their comfort rather than you.

Don't ditch the dummy.

Dummies are ACE

@FATEdestiny I totally understand what you are saying, and I'd prefer dummy and independent sleep over no dummy and lots of parental intervention. However my end goal is no dummy and no parental intervention if possible.

I'm not against dummy use at all, it's been a godsend so far, however my worry is that she's not getting proper naps in the day because of it and when she wakes up after a short nap of 30ish mins she's cranky as hell, and completely distraught by the end of a day of short naps. And the few times she has managed to sleep without the dummy her naps/sleep have been so much better.

I just wondered if anyone had had success of no dummy but still independent sleep.

That's normal for 4 months old.

A change happens after the "fourth trimester" and sleep changes from being as it was in the womb to being more adult like.

In the womb and through the fourth trimester (up to about 3.5-4 months old) baby's sleep is passive. This means sleep is the normal state - as long as all basic needs are met (nourishment, comfort, safety) then baby will be asleep. It's a passive thing.

They come out of that phase at around 4 months. It's often called "the 4 month sleep regression". It's not a regression though. It's progression. It's a permanent change, baby will never go back to the passive sleep of a newborn.

Post 4 months, sleep becomes an active endeavour. Sleep develops onto cycles with periods of lighter and deeper sleep often lasting in cycles of around 40 minutes.

The process of going to sleep is no longer passive, it is active and needs effort to go to sleep. Not passive like it was. Staying asleep is also active. Now sleep is in cycles baby needs to develop skills to be able to go through from a light sleep phase into a second sleep cycle without waking up.

This is why you get short naps starting at around 4 months old. It's nothing whatsoever to do with the dummy. If you used a dummy or didn't makes no difference - your baby would still go through this physiological change at 4 months old.