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3 Month old waking @ 5am - not hungry!

11 replies

olivia40404 · 22/02/2020 06:26

the last week or so my 3 month old has been going to bed as usual at about 10pm. we then do a night feed when she wakes around 2:30-3:30am. she used to sleep through til about 7am after this feed, but she’s started waking up crying at 5am.

she is definitely still tired at this time because as soon as i pick her up, she falls asleep! i’ve tried the pick up put down method, she just cries and cries every time she is put down, and keeps going until it’s 7am and then she starts her hungry cry. we’ve also tried altering bedtime, this doesn’t work either. i think 10pm is as late as i’d want her bedtime anyway, and having an earlier bedtime makes it worse.

the only way i can get her to stop crying and sleep longer is if i hold her or put her next to me in the bed - which i don’t want to get in the habit of because i know how unsafe co-sleeping is (and dont tell me it’s fine as long as you follow the safe sleep 7, i’m always knackered from the lack of sleep so don’t feel that i’m following the safe sleep 7 properly).

is this normal? what can i do to save myself from going insane every morning or putting her in danger by falling asleep holding her or putting her in my bed unsafely?? i’m at a loss of what to do.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
okiedokieme · 22/02/2020 07:03

I let mine sleep with me, meant they slept until 8 or 9. Both independent adults now. My youngest slept with me until age 6!

userabcname · 22/02/2020 07:30

This is very normal! Ds1 woke between 4am-5am every day for the first year or so of his life (despite waking every 1-2 hours throughout the night!). Sounds like you have a good little sleeper overall so this is hopefully just a phase. On a practical level, is anything happening at 5am to wake her? Someone using the loo, heating coming on and making a noise, room too cool/warm? White noise is a great way to drown out household noises if you aren't using it already. 3 weeks is also prime growth spurt time so have you tried feeding her at 5am to see if it settles her? She could be extra hungry. It is also very normal for babies to want to nap on you. If you are very against bringing her into your bed then the only suggestion I have to stop you falling asleep dangerously is to put her in a sling and start your day - she might get in an extra hour or two being carried around. Doesn't help your tiredness though, sorry!

Chocolatedaim · 22/02/2020 07:34

I think it must be the end of a sleep cycle because my DS, 6months, often wakes around 4.30am.
I put Brian ENO Music for Airports on my phone, cuddle him in bed until he is asleep and then put him back in his crib.
Occasionally I fall back asleep so he stays in our bed. I actually really enjoy that time with him

Singingatmidnight · 22/02/2020 07:52

Are you sure an earlier bedtime makes it worse? 10pm is quite late, and counterintuitively they sleep longer with an earlier bedtime.

Sounds like she's a great sleeper though

olivia40404 · 22/02/2020 08:39

thanks for your advice everyone.
i love having her in my bed and she sleeps so well for a few more hrs but i worry so much about sids! maybe i’m too much of a worrier.
@Singingatmidnight maybe we will try again with an earlier bedtime. what is considered a good bedtime for that age? or is it just trial and error?
i must say we are lucky that she has only been waking for one bottle a night until now. maybe we will try earlier bedtime and if she wakes a second time try feeding her.

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Singingatmidnight · 22/02/2020 08:43

I think we crept bedtime earlier from about 8 weeks, just by half an hour a day. I think by 3 months it was about 8pm, 7.30 at 3.5 months and 7pm at 4 months. Still at 7pm or a tad earlier at 5 months.

olivia40404 · 23/02/2020 07:06

@Singingatmidnight just want to say that we put her to bed at 9pm last night, and apart from a little bit of fussiness at around 6am (we just left her and she fell straight back asleep), she slept through til 7am with one bottle at 1:30am! amazing! thanks so much, would never have thought earlier bedtime meant longer sleep. Grin

OP posts:
Chocolatedaim · 23/02/2020 07:14

Sleep breeds sleep, that’s what my nana used to say!

PatricksRum · 23/02/2020 07:18

I would practice safe bed sharing or co-sleeping.

Singingatmidnight · 23/02/2020 07:37

Oh my goodness, congratulations! Grin

AmieB · 29/01/2021 21:49

@olivia40404 did you ever resolve this? Our 3 month old has done EXACTLY this since he was born and every time I give up and bring him into our bed where he will sleep until 7-8am. More so because I don't want him to wake his older sister so every morning I cave! Wondering if you managed to find a way to stop it, or if it gradually stopped on its own? I like you worry about sids and also don't want to get into the habit of Co sleeping every single morning arghh xx

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