If you baby was EBF AND a good sleeper please read!

[BrownBirdsFly]

My first daughter was a dreadful dreadful sleeper, only really sleeping through at 3.5 YEARS. I now have a 5 month old who seems to sleep much better, already we’ve had some 5 hour stretches out of him, which seems pretty decent for a breastfed baby of this age...

Now my question is, I currently feed my baby to sleep, he goes to sleep on the breast, put him down, no drama. Everything I’ve read says that baby needs to learn to self settle, be put down drowsy but awake etc. To be able to ever sleep through the night.

Are there any EBFs out there who fed their baby to sleep (or rocked them or used any other ‘sleep association thing’) whose baby just slept through the night (or for 6-8 hour stretches). Is the self settling thing a myth!?

I know that all babies eventually sleep through, but just interested in the responses, thanks all

Xxx

Hi
My baby was EBF ... he is now almost 11 months and on solids and BF to go to bed and in the night. Never had formula but will introduce cows milk at 1.
Tbh I never worried about self settling...he did it himself a few times in his crib when smaller and I’ve always fed or rocked to sleep.
I was getting a bit worried as at various times he has been up every 2 hours but I think this has been related to teeth or illness.
I had a couple of nights where he would sleep 5/6 hours but I’ve found since I went back to work and he has been to childminder/ my mums and also started to be more physically active he has slept much more. Some days he only has only nap and he did 10 hours straight that night!
So in a nutshell yes I still feed to sleep and if he wakes in the night but these occasions are lessening. I don’t feed him to sleep in the day just put him in his cot when he starts running his eyes x
Sorry a bit waffley!

Only have 1 DD but she slept through early from EBF and being fed to sleep. Not every night but mostly from about 2 months old, then she woke mostly once a night from 4-12 months sometimes twice, sometimes not. After 12m started patting or holding to sleep (with dummy) and most nights no wake ups. Always held her and transferred her into her cot when she was sleeping until she was 2 and a bit. Sometimes she still falls asleep on us. Never really got her to self settle until then but didn't need to sleep train or anything

My DD was an appalling sleeper and only managed 5 hours at 2yo but DS was a great sleeper from the beginning. They both breastfed to sleep but while DD needed the breast for sleep, comfort and food, for DS it was just food. He often fed, stopped, moved around a bit and put himself to sleep even as a newborn. Very different experience from DD who would fall asleep with a nipple in her mouth and wail as soon as I tried to take it out.

You’ve been lucky second time round, don’t second guess yourself. There no evidence whatsoever that there is an ability to self sooth, nor that it develops in time/at a certain age, nor that it can be taught. It’s entirely made up by people who sell parenting books to sleep deprived parents.

I fed all three of mine to sleep. Two slept through (11-7) 6 weeks and 10 weeks onwards. The other slept 11-7 at nearly 3!!

DS barely slept day or night until about 7 years old. DD slept through the night from about 2 weeks and she also slept during the day for two hours morning and afternoon.

I breastfed them both to sleep every time.

I didn’t do anything different with DD she just slept, I tried everything to get DS to sleep, he just didn’t sleep.

Two different babies with different personalities.

My 4 have all been breast fed to sleep and for the first six months have all slept through the night (more or less!)

At 7 month they each started waking and wanting to feed in the night. I put this down to needing food for a growth spurt rather than being a bad habit. I do that but I'm also aware that if they have too much milk it seems to make them uncomfortable and then they want more and more. So I try to limit it if they start frequent night feeds and eventually cut it out by cuddling but not allowing milk.
I think it's quicker to comfort your baby than expect them to self settle.
Feeding to sleep definitely hasn't been a problem for any of my kids. I certainly never woke any of them after they finish feeding!

DD is 10 weeks and is either fed to sleep or has cheek strokes/dummy until she falls asleep. She's slept 8-7 for about the last three weeks (weight gain fine!) although occasionally, as in maybe once a week, wakes around 4am for a feed.

DS was also EBF with all the same tricks with bedtime and didn't sleep through consistently until he was over 1 so I don't think our actions have affected things either way!

OMG my pet hate is people getting all judgy about feeding to sleep. Why would you not do something that works now on the off chance it creates a problem later? My view is that it is swapping potential later problem for definite now problem so it’s a bs trade.

In any event, like PP my DS was a pretty bad sleeper (still not consistent now at 3yo). My DD strted sleeping 8-8 at 7 weeks old and has done so pretty much always since, bar a week or two of illness. Both fed to sleep 🤷🏼‍♀️ Different kids - same input, different output.

Thanks all SO much for your replies. They really mean a lot.

It’s pretty much confirmed what I thought and like @Booboostwo I’ve noticed with this baby who sleeps better he doesn’t seem to use the boob for comfort, just food! I think that’s help him naturally sleep better.

He’s poorly at the moment so bad a couple of bad nights but I feel confident it will improve.

Thanks everyone. Xxx

@stealthbanana I feel this way too. I’ve had so many comments about people blaming me for my daughters poor sleeping and I’ve beaten myself up about it. Since having baby number 2 it’s shown me that it was actually not me but just a personality thing! Xx

@BrownBirdsFly it’s ludicrous isn’t it. They do what they want to do, when they are ready. Just enjoy the snuggles (I always loved feeding to sleep, so peaceful and wonderful to just sit with a snoozing baby/toddler in your arms)

My DD is 10.5 months, EBF (has never willingly taken a bottle!), and first slept through from 8pm to 7am when she was 2 days shy of 3 months old!!

Since then (aside from regressions and/or leaps), she either sleeps through (these days, closer to 10.5hrs - she seems to need less sleep than the "average" for her age you find on sleep websites), or she wakes for 1 feed around 5am, and settles herself back to sleep even if I put her back into the cot awake.

She NEVER fed to sleep as a newborn. It just wasn't her thing. I would have LOVED to have fed her to sleep in the early days, especially in the middle of the night, she didn't have a bar of it. Then around 4 months old, she started doing it sometimes - only for the last evening feed before bed, and honestly, it was fine. It didn't affect how she slept at all. Still slept like a little champion. She mostly doesn't feed to sleep these days, because we feed then do books (so many books....), then into her cot with some songs while she's still awake since she was about 6 months old.

Honestly, it's all her. Only thing that I did was to encourage her to take naps in her cot around 2 months old with patting (oh, so much patting) and white noise because she was a big baby, and hated carriers and slings, and I wasn't going to rock her for hours on end if I didn't have to. And once that was done, she prefers the cot and doesn't sleep easily if held.