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3 year refuses to sleep alone.

2 replies

MaggieMcSplash · 08/02/2020 06:31

Hi all. I'm a mum of two kids. First kid dd is a great sleeper and always has been. Second child ds has struggled since he was born. As a baby he didn't want to be put down, wanted to sleep on my chest. Tried self soothing with him as a baby and young toddler but it just didn't work. When he could stand he would try and throw himself out of the cot if we tried to leave him or do controlled crying. He's 3 now and we are still co-sleeping. I've tried a gro clock and reward chart. He will now sleep until about 11pm in his own bed and wake up wanting into ours. We will try and sit with him until he goes back to sleep but 5 minutes later he wakes up. He just can't sleep on his own. Once he's in with us and has human contact he falls asleep instantly. We've tried to be firm, putting him back but he just cries so much and doesn't stop. I feel awful when he's so distressed so I cave and take him in. He's a very stubborn little thing and he would cry all night and make himself sick. I don't know what to do anymore. Love him dearly and want him to be happy. I also want to be able to sleep in my own bed. He's getting big and takes up a lot of the bed. He also likes to be in the middle between me and DH. How do I sort this without causing huge distress to DS. Is it too late for a sleep therapist? Any tips on what to do would be much appreciated.

OP posts:
pollyputthepastaon · 08/02/2020 06:36

Absolutely identical 3 year old here. We let him slip in with us, he appears about
Midnight and climbs in the middle and goes straight to sleep. Reliable as clockwork every night. Sometimes I’d slip out and use the spare bedroom to have more room!

He is 4 next week and for the last 5 nights has started sleeping through in his own bed! After years of coming through.

Your son won’t be needing you like this when he is 18. Or even 12. Or probably 9!

Can’t you just ride it out? He’s so tiny and you’ll cause him so much distress.

MaggieMcSplash · 08/02/2020 10:26

Hi Polly. Thank you it is good to know there is an end in sight. I think I might have to ride it out and accept he just needs this. We do have a spare room so I might suggest we take turns at using it so at least we both get some sleep.

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