2 month old struggles to nap?

[olivia40404]

Hi everyone! My 2-month-old daughter really struggles to nap in the day and has done ever since she was born. She will sleep for maybe 30-45 mins (one sleep cycle), then wake up and be miserable - crying until her next bottle is due sometimes an hour later - because she’s clearly still tired but can’t get back to sleep!

I’ve tried all combinations of swaddling/not swaddling, settling her myself, trying to let her self settle, dummy, no dummy. Nothing seems to help. I’ve also tried just letting her be awake and trying to talk to her and play with her, but she’s far too upset. I know she’s still tired because if I were to hold her for her naps, she would sleep for hours - but sadly I can’t hold her all day...

Everywhere online says to keep the room light and bright and noisy, but could this be what is stopping her from napping properly? I don’t want to get into the habit of creeping around her in a dark house in the daytime though!

If anyone can help give me some tips that would be fab. She is usually able to settle herself in the night - I will hear her wake up and stir and go back to sleep. So why can’t she do it in the day? What can we try? TIA!

2 months is really quite small - if i were you to get her proper sleep I'd just get yourself set up at naptime, TV on, tea and biscuits at the ready, and let her sleep on you. She's so tiny, she needs the comfort.

If she naps well when she’s on you, then as PP said I would get yourself cosy with some snacks, a drink and some box sets and let her sleep on you. This is exactly what my DS was like and it eventually pass and my gosh I miss those sleepy snuggles. No it’s not practical to do it all the time when you’ve got jobs to do, but have you tried a sling? So she’s still got the close physical contact with you but you can still potter about and get jobs done?

@Moonshine160 @ReallyLilyReally thank you both. I wasn’t sure if I should be worried about her getting used to only sleeping on me - I don’t really fancy having to be up all night every night so that she can sleep on my chest lol!!
She’s doing well at night right now so I guess I don’t need to worry. This is all new to us lol. Guess I’ll get some good snacks in and prepare for some cuddly naps - what a hard life

Feed on demand even for FF.

And at that age I did let him sleep on me, I needed the recovery time

With hindsight, I spent way too much time worrying about "creating habits" with my newborn when in fact they change so much in the first 6 months that (within reason) anything goes. I should have spent more time letting them nap on me, it would have been fine.

For when you do want/need to put her down, try playing around with the timings a bit. At that stage 5 minutes could make a big difference in under/over tired, both of which would knock everything off track.

Also, don't be too led by the clock on feeds. My newborn fed hourly (or less!) until 15 weeks when they settled into a more "normal" pattern. As long as their weight gain/wet nappies are fine then you can feed as you need to. I'm not trying to say your baby is hungry, just that you shouldn't be bound by the 3-4 hour timeslot that is often referred to. As someone sensible once said to me, as an adult we don't look at a clock and say "well, I had a drink at 11am so nothing until 3pm even though I'm a bit thirsty" so why should we expect tiny ones to follow this rule.

Finally, enjoy the box sets!

I agree with PP. Don't worry about waiting for set times to feed. We feed our DS on demand and usually when he wakes up he's hungry so we give him a bottle. He's formula fed. We've found many times if he wakes up and we feed him, if he's still sleepy, a bottle will send him back off to sleep for a bit longer.

DS was bad for daytime naps at first. He's just under 3 months and only just starting to have decent daytime naps when we're not holding him.

thanks everyone. in regards to feeding, she’s definitely not hungry when she wakes up - i’ve tried offering a bottle many times, she’s just upset because she’s woken up. what i mean is that she then will cry until she’s eventually hungry, then have a bottle, then sleep after for another 30 mins and it cycles all over again.

i will stop worrying about habits and hold her for more naps. yesterday i held her a lot more, she slept a lot more and actually did better during the night.

@olivia40404 really glad you had a better night! You'll hear a lot of people saying stuff about "good habits early" and "not making a rod for your own back" but you'll also never hear anyone say "now my baby is grown, i can honestly say that I'm really glad i didnt hold her too much when she was small". Do whatever you need to get through the day, and enjoy those beautiful moments when she's curled up on you.