Alternative to dummy, is there one?

[NathansMummy0203]

My youngest DS is currently 4 months old. I have used a dummy with him to settle for sleeps as I have done with my older 2. The thing is that this time around it seems to be more of a hinderance than a help during the night as it must fall out about 10 times and I need to put it back in for him. He no longer feeds during the night, just has his dummy. With the older 2 once they were in a deep sleep and it fell out they never really bothered . So I was wondering if there was something else I could try that someone could recommend? The sleepless nights are driving me insane because it's no longer for a feed, just to re-insert his dummy. Thank you

Have you tried settling him without it? Did a bit of research on this when we were working out whether or not we wanted to give one to DD (we didnt in the end) and wisdom seems to say that if you get rid of the dummy around 3-6 months the memories of sucking to soothe fade much faster than if you get rid of it from 6-12 months... so maybe if it's turned into a pain just get rid of it?

My DS is 7 weeks old and we haven't used a dummy so far but last night he contentedly fell asleep sucking on DH's finger (??) - it actually made us think that maybe he needs something to suck on to settle, so we should investigate using dummies.

Our baby was always sucking our fingers to sleep, so we started using a dummy. Around four months she figured out how to get it back in her own mouth at night, after some trial and error.

Can you let the baby play with the dummy in the day and see if he gets the hang of it?

The dummy is an alternative to a nipple, not sure what the alternative to a dummy would be - a finger probably, and that can lead to an even longer term habit that dummy use!
Four months is a bad time for baby's sleep anyway (as I'm sure you know). It's also a time when I would be keen to still follow any safer sleep advice and dummy use is now part of that isn't it?
But so, so frustrating. I can remember surrounding mine with dummies in the hope he would pick one up if he lost the first one!

Thank you all. I have tried settling him without it as this has been on my mind for a while but we just end up giving in in the end as it ends up so stressful. That's a good idea about letting him play with it, I just assumed he was too small at 4 months to be able to do that :-) I was thinking mote about these white noise things I've seen - myhummy, Ewan the sheep etc. Not sure if I should try that instead of the dummy. They're quite expensive..... yes, 4 months is probably the worst time to be considering this but I am on my knees here :-(

Does he look for it in the night? Our ds used to do this but I can’t remember if he was a bit older than yours but our solution (after weeks of having to go into his room 7-8 times a night) was to literally surround him with dummies. At his most I think he had 9!

It doesn’t solve the problem of the dummy dependency but if he’s only using it at night I don’t see it as a huge issue at this stage. Plus it means you all get a good nights sleep.

Oh, I remember this problem! It used to drive me mad, we'd both wake up every 30 mins to put the dummy back in!

What we found worked was putting him in a sleeping bag, but putting his hand+arms inside it, almost like he was swaddled. It worked!

We also moved him to his own bedroom around 4-5months because I found we were waking eachother up :).

Good luck, I know it's such a pain.

He doesn’t look for it he just fusses until he gets it put back in and if we don’t put it back in (which I have tried many times) it escalates to crying. I’m not that bothered about the dependency at this stage, more just if this is going to always be the way when it falls out until he’s able to put it back in himself - whenever that is. Yes! Every 30 minutes sometimes, it’s brutal. Seems to get worse the later it gets. Sleeps good from 7pm to 1 or 2am then it’s every 30 or 40 minutes from then until 7am. Have actually tried swaddling again aswell just to see if it helped but unfortunately not :-( I have ordered Ewan the sheep in sheer desperation. Fingers are crossed for a miracle.

Before mine had learnt how to look for his dummy I had him in his sleepyhead next to me in bed so I just had to lift an arm then go back to sleep.

When he went through a phase of not looking for it when he was in his own room i ended up putting a mattress in there and slept on the floor! Was probably for a couple of weeks but at least it meant I wasn’t traipsing across the landing each time.

Could something like that be an option?

It won’t be long before he can learn to settle or look for a dummy but it is tough

I attached mine to DD with a short plastic dummy clip (so no choking hazard) and encouraged her to learn how to put it back in by herself during the day (she wouldn't have it attached all day but after her bath, after nap time, in the car etc). She soon learned where to look for it and could put it back in herself at night.

We're in exactly the same cycle. It's so reassuring to know that you're also in the same boat (as rocky as that boat is!)
Same routine sleep wise too - fine until 1am or 2am and then constant after that
I was considering getting rid of the dummy but weighing up the pros and cons, at the moment, it feels safest and "easiest" to stick with it. Just for the time being anyway.
Chin up. "This too shall pass".