Nap resister - 11.5 month old

[Bonwid]

Advice needed!
My LO has had ups and downs with sleep and napping, but up until recently was able to self settle for 2 naps in the day in his cot. The last few weeks, he has been crying when put in his cot before we've even left the room. Where as previously he'd moan a bit and then settle and fall asleep, he now stays sat up and just cries and cries despite being utterly exhausted. So I've had to take him out for walks or drives to get him to sleep recently, as that (at least) works.
This all started BEFORE I went back to work (part time) and he started nursery. Since starting nursery 2 weeks ago, he has napped really well there (which I was really pleased about initially) but after asking them about it, they told me that they rock him to sleep (something that we've never done). I'm not sure if this new introduction of rocking to sleep has now confused matters with him too. Anyway, any advice on how to get him back on track would be much appreciated!
In case anyone asks...
His routine previously was always; a nap 3 hours after waking in the morning, and 3 hours from waking from his first nap. I would give him a bottle (I weaned day feeds in December) read some books in his cot, with white noise in the background, I'd say 'have a little sleep' and then leave the room. He'd stay sat up for a bit, grumble and chatter but then lie down and self settle.

Id say the rocking is probably the issue - I'd get them to stop that completely and then give it a few weeks to see if it improves

Sounds like he maybe ready for one nap a day.

Or maybe you could rock him to sleep too.

Sometimes my son would cry when I leave him for a nap (he's 15 months now) but I just let him cry. If he didn't settle after 10-15 min then I'd go in, settle him in my arms, or if he seemed really awake give him a 15min play time before putting him to bed again. Worked for me.

Thanks for your advice! I was wondering about asking nursery to stop as this is definitely a new sleep association but the nursery have baby mats rather than cots and it's in the same room as the nursery. So I assume they need him to be able to sleep otherwise he'd just crawl off? I started rocking him a few times (he's currently asleep on me after rocking him now) but I can't seem to transfer him to the cot, he just screams and is wide awake. I did wonder if he's ready to drop the first nap. But even if he misses the first one, when I try to put him down in the afternoon he fights it just as hard. It's as if he's never been able to self sooth. Has anyone had similar and come out of the other side?!

I'd recommend talking to the nursery, because really at this age you should be removing sleep crutches rather than adding them. Maybe leave your travel cot at the nursery to make life a little easier for them. Bottom line is, if what they're doing is making your life much more difficult, they need a new strategy.

I agree regarding sleep crutches. Di you think it could just be settling in to going to nursery and being away from me though? I'm wondering if I'm blowing things out of proportion? I agree though the whole rocking to sleep issue has really annoyed me. The nursery are supposed to do what we do to get him to sleep. Rocking is never something we've done 😑

It could be, but the rocking definitely isnt helping and needs to stop.

You're right. I just tried to put him down again in his cot. He just screamed and screamed. Trying to settle him through the bars etc doesn't work. He just wants to put his head on my shoulder. He was desperate to sleep so I'm again holding him after rocking him. I know if I try to transfer him to his cot he will wake and scream again 😬😭

Im furious with the nursery on your behalf.

Just an update. I asked the nursery to stop abd I think they have changed something because he is sleeping less there. However, napping at home is still not happening unless rocked. I've currently got him asleep on me again. He turned 1 yesterday! He seems to fight sleep unless held. Any thoughts?! Again, he previously self settled in the day and does self settle at night. Very confused about what's going on. Currently I'm taking him in the car or buggy to nap still. I feel like rocking him at home is not helping him but when left in his cot (like we used to) he just cries and cries, even leaving him for longer periods. He now doesn't lie down either, just sits and stares at the door. Separation anxiety?

Hi guys just need an advice.

I have a 12 month old daughter and I seem to be struggling with her napping schedule. Her bed time is around 8:30 pm. She usually sleeps through the night (just occasional waking up but soon dose) and usually has a good 12 hrs of sleep (waking up at 8:30am in the morning)

She has a nap of 1hr - 1 1/2 hrs around 11:30 am. Lunch between 1-1:30 pm and she usually start rubbing her eyes ( she does that when she is sleepy /tired) around 3pm ish. Thinking that she needs another small afternoon nap I take her to the room n put her down but she always resist it. ( today it took me 50 min to put her down for a nap). The other day I just gave her 1 morning nap and in the afternoon I kept her busy by playing with her even tho the poor thing was sleepy. As a result she was cranky, irritable ( on top of that she is also having separation anxiety since her first birthday- making things difficult for me as I am unable to do household chores)

Today she slept for a nap at 3:50 pm obviously I don't want the nap to interfere with her sleep time. I will see how long she will nap for the afternoon. ( I hope not too long 😐)

But any suggestions how I can make her nap just once in between so it's enough for the day.
Thanks hope to hear from u all soon

Sounds like might be ready to drop to one nap. Identical situation to my little one - started the process of dropping to one nap at 12.5 months, took about a month for it to feel ok. Now at 16 months and naps for 2hrs from 12ish like a dream!

Try missing the morning nap, have lunch earlier (12 ish?) and let her have her nap after lunch. As it's earlier, hopefully if it's longer than before, it won't impact her night time sleeping.

Thanks @terryandthechocolateorange and @Seeline
That’s what I was thinking may be she is ready to drop one nap. She slept only for 45 min for afternoon nap (thankfully) she was sort off sleepy towards 7:30 pm but the process of putting her to sleep ( unfortunately she is used to rocking to sleep ) took half hour. So she actually slept at 9ish today

@seeline I will give her early lunch tomorrow. What if she is sleeping over her lunch? I guess I won’t be able to put her to sleep soon after she is fed is it?

Don't let her sleep before lunch. I used to put mine down straight after lunch, seemed to work fine.

@Seeline thanks will try and see what happens today

@Seeline hurrah my LO slept for 2:15 min (well still sleeping as I write this post)

Gave her early lunch may be around 12:00 pm and she played with me for an hour after she finished her lunch and then I put her for nap at around 1 pm ( however she just briefly woke up after 45 min but managed to put her down again).

Fingers crossed 🤞 she will be okie for bedtime and will sleep with no trouble

Hey guys. Managing to give my daughter early lunch and putting her for nap by 1ish since past two days. However she keeps waking up every 40-45 min I then have to go again and put her to sleep , she doesn't take that long to go back to sleep. is it a normal thing (waking every 45 min )When you are doing nap transition for a toddler)

Maybe just adjusting to new routine? How did bedtime go last night?

Have to say, both my DCs dropped all daytime naps at 18 months, so you might not have long left anyway. Sorry!!

@Seeline last night was okie she took maybe 20 min to fall asleep. She kept waking up tho maybe 4 times during night (have to pat her to go back to sleep).

However today is a struggle. We went for a baby shower this eve. We left the venue at 7:30 pm (she was getting a bit sleepy then) she sort of slept in the car seat for maybe 10- 15min or so. We reached home just before 8:30 pm (she woke up when we reached home) I took her for a bath. She was ready to sleep by 9:10 pm. Unfortunately, she is still not slept it's 10:15 pm I had to ask my husband to take over as i was getting tired and bit frustrated as she was not falling asleep. Ahhhhh 🤦🏻‍♀️

Ohhh nooo I don't wasn't my LO to drop her nap. I will be unable to do any household work if she does not sleep.
Also she is going through separation anxiety where is just won't let me go anywhere, has stopped playing down by her own as she use to do, even sometimes I use to put a bit of rhymes on YouTube where she use to watch. She use to be in and out of kitchen happily watching and playing with her toys, while I use to quickly finish what needs to be done in the kitchen. She has completely stopped doing that ... she does not want to leave me. ☹️

Hello

I am just wondering how this turned out? My little girl is 11.5 months and is going through exactly the same. It is taking me 30-40 mins to get her down for naps and bedtime is horrendous, last night took hours! I have not changed anything and I know she is going through alot of development but she is tired.