4 month old - waking 6/7 times a night, will not sleep without breastfeeding

[Leob123456]

Hi All

Hoping for some advice...

My bb is 4months old, since birth he has co slept as he would not sleep in his Moses, he is breastfed and has never slept well.

He wakes basically hourly every night and will not go back to sleep until he is breastfed back to sleep. He will not take a dummy. We have tried bottle feeding at night yet he will still want the boob. Even with day time naps he will only sleep if fed to sleep or if I take him for a walk in his buggy.

We have just started a bed time routine bath,book, bottle etc.

Any advice on how to wean him from this sleep association? It would be greatly appreciated as I have been running on minimal sleep for the past 4 months and I’m tired lol

Thanks

At around this age I twigged that by feeding more from late afternoon onwards that DD went longer at night before waking for a feed so I moved her afternoon feeds closer together so that by bedtime she was well fed.

I’d also consider trying to have your baby sleep in a cot again just in case your shuffling around in bed is waking him up frequently.

But do bear in mind that they go through little phases of needing to feed more for a growth spurt or whatever so this might be one of those.

SO we're working on breaking that same association now with our 11wk DD. At the moment we're focusing on bedtime and nightime, and being relaxed about feeding to sleep for daytime naps.

First thing we did was get her happy in the next-to-me crib. We put a shirt that either me or DH had worn during the day on the mattress, and warmed it up with a hot water bottle. Then we just kept putting her down, and resettling her when she woke up, back in the crib.

Next we started a bedtime routine, for us this is bath, feed, bed. We started with this at about 9pm, and eventually moved that forward to 7pm. It still takes about an hour and a half to get her down, but we get there. She goes to sleep in the crib and my husband and i sit downstairs and stare at the monitor and talk about her instead of whatever we used to do before we had a baby!

The bit we're doing now is putting her into bed awake. So i feed her, for aaaages, or until she's asleep on the boob/dozy, and then i put her down. She usually wakes up, and i just put her down and leave. From there it's 50/50 what happens next - either she grizzles for a bit (max 15 minutes, bit of whimpering and grumbling and whining and flailing about) and then falls asleep, or she gets upset and screams, and then DH goes upstairs and settles her down. Usually works 2nd or 3rd time.

We're still feeding her right before bed, but not directly to sleep... I'm hoping as she gets older we can get a bit more space between the feed and sleep, but at the moment she's going down awake half the time and for us that feels like a proper victory.

I second @INeedNewShoes on cluster/marathon feeding to get better sleep through the night.

I admit to just letting them, by that age they learned to latch on without me assisting so they just snacked at night on demand it worked for us, I didn't even wake

No advice, but in exactly the same situation. Tonight looks like it's going to be particularly bad! Started bedtime at 7.30, and apart from one stretch of an hour, has barely slept more than ten minutes without waking up again. We have no nap routine so I'm going to tackle that first, in the hope it will help with night sleep as well. Might be worth a try?

My DS is 6 months and has woke every 2 hours (if not hourly!) since about 3 months. I have no advice!

After speaking to the health visitor today, we are going to attempt a gentle version of 'gradual retreat'.
sleeplady.com/baby-sleep/4-month-sleep-regression/
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/sleep/1394888-What-worked-for-us-Hope-this-helps?pg=5&order=

Honestly I'd just stop giving her the boob (except at mealtimes obviously). Get your dh to settle her (so she doesn't smell/feel the boob). Don't give in. The first couple of nights will be horrible but then she'll get used to it and it should get better quickly.

We're in the same boat with a 4 month old.
I'm also co-sleeping the majority of the night or I'd go Insane. I've started getting him almost asleep on the boob then switching it for a dummy - the NUK latex dummy is most like a nipple and way softer then silicone ones. It's the only one that works for us.
Then I pop him in his next to me and snuggle up to him until he resettles. It seems to be working some what. During the night I do the same until about 3am where I pretty much give up and just keep boobs out and available for him to latch onto! X

About the dummy - have you tried a few different kinds? My LO will spit any of the traditional shape ones but LOVES his Phillips Soothies. It took a fair few duds before finding the ones he liked.

After two nights of gentle sleep training at bed time, we've had the best two nights so far. We're starting bed time earlier, I'll feed DS then DH takes over - just talking and patting to him, but trying to avoid picking him up. See my links above for ideas. Last night DS was screaming after ten minutes, so DH picked him up for a cuddle. Once calm and nearly asleep, put him back down and gently patted again. Success!!!
First time ever he's gone to sleep without boob, and he also slept 5 and a half hours solid. He woke up twice in the night, and went quickly back to sleep after boob. This is a dramatic improvement.
We're not bothering with sleep training at night or for naps, but just doing it for a short while at bedtime is definitely helping. I wouldn't try for ages if they're screaming, four months is too little. But given that DS often screams in the car, ten minutes of screaming at bedtime with daddy to comfort him doesn't seem too awful/!!

I find feeding lots from 5pm onwards really helps them stay full all night and sleep longer. I also find the more they nap during the day the more they sleep at night. I don’t have any routines to be honest, and would not try controlled crying. I just let mine do her own thing and give her what she wants when she asks for it. I find if it gets to the point when they start crying then they are harder to calm and ultimately go back to sleep, so I feed her as soon as I hear/see the signs that she’s hungry. Some babies do really well with imposed routines but I find with mine she’s much better if I go with her own little routine. She only really wakes once a night and doesn’t cry at all at night and I think my relaxed approach suits her as she’s very chilled. But all babies are different and respond to different approaches.