What's normal for a 9 week old?

[Bleepers]

I feel like I'm going crazy. Everyone from NCT seems to have babies that sleep in good chunks. My 9week old gets 4 hours at the start of the night and then max 2 hours but more likely 1 hour and tonight she has only slept on me or my husband from 3am. Is this normal? Will it change?

I thought she woke because she was hungry but I actually don't think that's the case. She might be uncomfortable as she grunts alot but doesn't cry at all unless she's left alone which we don't do.

She's very healthy, alert and happy. She naps every 1.5-2 hours in the day as well.

I just want to know this is normal because real life and the internet seem full of people having a better time of it than we are.

there is no such thing as normal at this age. every baby is different and your baby doesn't sound significantly extreme on the spectrum range of what can be expected. remember also that some of your nct acquaintances will be exaggerating how good things are for them, and representing a single example or a stretch of 2-4 nights of their best-ever experience and pretending (perhaps even to themselves) that that's 'normal' and the (frequent) less-good nights are unusual.

your baby is healthy and growing and all is well. sleep may always be a little chaotic or may settle down and you will latch on to one or two things that you think created a magic combination and try to reproduce that every night and sometimes it will work and sometimes it won't, because in reality it is a bit random.

you are certainly right in your instincts that sometimes milk isn't what is needed. crys can sometimes mean 'hungry' or 'uncomfortable' but can also mean 'I just need to explain how tired I am' or 'this is all too exciting, I need quiet and darkness now' so sometimes picking up and cuddling is the wrong thing to do.

My DD is nearly 11 weeks. I thought she'd found her own sleeping pattern, walking at 3am and 5am but she's constantly changing. Some nights she wakes every 1/1.5 hours others she sleeps for chunks of 3-4 hours. I had one night last week where she wouldn't sleep unless I held her, all night!
Don't judge yourself, or your DD, against what others are claiming, half of it probably isn't true or the others having a tougher time just don't talk about it.

If she isn't crying, just having a chunter or grunt then I wouldn't pick her up. My baby has this little weird groan he does right before he goes to sleep, and during the early days I used to pick him up for a cuddle when he did it. Realised after a while I was waking him up just as he was settling himself! I would follow your instincts on when she is hungry or actually needs comfort from you, but at other times just leave her to see if she comforts herself or falls asleep. Also things get better I promise! Our 9 week old was just like yours, but now at 5 months gets through on only one feed.