WHEN WILL IT END?

[wingingitalltheway]

The sleepless nights are killing me! Any wisdom on what can help?!
My DD is 11 weeks old and so far is not a sleeper.
Tonight she slept from 10-1 (this is amazing) and has been up since then! She had a feed (FF) at 1am and then as she is quite a windy and sicky baby, I hold her upright for a little while to try to avoid vomiting. She falls asleep in my arms. At this point I try to move her into her crib, one of those next to me style ones. I’ll then have a maximum of 20 mins before she starts crying again. When I pick her up, within seconds her eyes are rolling and she’s falling asleep. We’ve done this about 4 times now since 1am. She’ll happily sleep on me all night but this then means I get absolutely no sleep.

Some other things I’ve tried:
Dummy (made her gag and then vomit)

White noise
Starting a bit of a nighttime routine, bath etc.

I know she’s only little but this amount of sleep is killing me! What else can I try? Will she at some point just start sleeping or are there other things I can do? The only thing I don’t want to do is co sleep. I know it really works for some people and there are ways to do it safely but it’s just not for me. I’m also not sure about these really strict routines as she still seems a bit young to me but feeling totally clueless as a first time mum!
Argh, help!

Could she have reflux? Can often disturb sleeping, especially following safe sleep (on back etc), yet not effect sleep on you of she's more upright or even on her front - I write this as I have my 14 week old asleep over my shoulder. We're also having one of those nights where he wakes everytime he's put down! Yet some nights he'll go straight down after a feed - seems to be completely random at this age, or just dumb luck if you happen to have a baby who does sleep with no problems!

I wondered if it was that and took her to the GP before Christmas but the doctor said she was sure it was just wind.
We had one glorious night when she slept for almost 6 hours and I naively thought it was the start of better nights.
She’s still asleep on me. Going to try to put her down again in a minute but I’m not hopeful!

Sitting here with my 11 week old who does not want to go in her moses basket tonight at all, but will sleep like a dream on my. So you have my sympathy.

Yep ive had the odd night where he's slept from 12/1 to 5 and it's like yes I can do this. Then the next night is back to 1-2 hourly wake ups.

Is she totally FF or mixed?

Think we just had a record of the shortest time! Put her down at 5, crying by 5.03 😩 asleep on me already!
@katmarie so bloody hard isn’t it! I know some people who smugly tell me their baby slept through at 8 weeks!
I would love even 2 hourly at this point. She seems to only do a three hour stint in her cot and then just won’t sleep unless it’s on me after that.
She’s totally FF. I did BF for 3 weeks but ended up stopping after mastitis etc. Felt horribly guilty about it as I really wanted to BF but I was in so much pain and really anxious all the time about feeding.

My baby is 4 months now, and she was exactly the same, now she sleeps for 6 hours at night which feels a lot better! What helped for us was tilting her next to me crib as far as it would go so she wasn’t lying flat, we also slept her in a sleepyhead for a while but apparently not sids safe when they can start turning. Also made sure she was warm enough, put a hot water bottle in her cot under a blanket to warm the cot up then removed it before putting her in the cot seemed to help a lot. Our baby now sleeps with the room temp at 20degrees, in a 2.5 tog sleeping bag with a vest and baby grow on, and a crocheted blanket over her, as crochet/knitted blankets are breathable if they accidentally pull them over their face. Gripe water and infacol also helped us so much. And doing bicycling movements for 10 minutes to get rid of trapped wind. Putting baby in the bath before bed helps them to relax and get rid of trapped wind too. Hope it gets better for you soon op! Congratulations

Have you tried elevating the head end of the sleeping area? And/or putting baby down on their side?

I remember a friend saying to me that people tend to downplay how often their baby wakes up - probably for their own sanity rather than to show their baby is a great sleeper; “Yes, they’re going through the night. They get a feed at half ten, then they top up at two. They wake up at five and I get a little extra sleep by having them in bed with me.” So just ignore the “Josh is already sleeping through”. It’s probably a distortion of the truth. And even if it is the case, Josh may turn into the sleeper from hell next week.

You’re not alone. And it does stop. I didn’t have anyone I could ask, so I know it’s not always possible, but do you have somebody who could do a night shift for you now and again?

@Inthebleakmidwinterz thank you for the tips! There’s a few things I haven’t tried that you’ve suggested so I’ll give them a go. Hopefully my DD will be the same and we’ll have some sort of solid sleep soon! Is it safe to lift the head of their crib? I’ve heard a few people say that works but the NHS website says not to do that for reflux. Is that just a precaution though?
Our room is currently 17.8 degrees and she has a sleepsuit and a 2.5 tog on. Wonder if she’s a bit chilly but I have followed the guidance on what they should be wearing!
My DP will help if I’m absolutely desperate but I feel bad waking him up when he has work the next day. My family live miles away so unless they’re visiting for a few days they can’t just pop over.

Just to add you're not alone. I have a 3m old DD who was exactly the same. She started sleeping for 6-7 hrs 6 weeks ago and is now regressing back to 4 hrs. I'm hoping because she's a bit poorly but not sure really. I second the suggestions of a tilted cot and the hot water bottle. I've found that putting a heating pad in the cot when I get her out for a feed means that the transition from me back to cot isn't too much of a shock heat-wise and really helps! I've also been using the sleepyhead in there every night as I was absolutely desperate! I have a breathing pad underneath though and put her to sleep on her back.

I started using a sleepyhead due to a similar situation. My 4 month old is still using it now (worried about hiow he will sleep when we stop using it). It made a big difference to his sleep at the time but 4 month sleep regression has meant we've taken step backwards!

Just stopping by quickly to offer my experience.
Our sleep transformed with swaddling wraps from Amazon. So much so I ordered the next size when she grew out of the newborn size. Wish I'd tried them with DC1.

Our experience was similar, obviously newborns are newborn and no nothing different about sleep but it's so tough for us isn't it. I fought on with the feeds and then came on here for advice too.
I changed DC2's formula to reflux milk (C&G bought in many big shops/ boots etc) which was a game changer almost instantly. She's been on it since and now 7 months. Our sicky episodes were dramatically reduced for a long long time.
Her issues have resurfaced recently though with weaning but that's a whole new story.

I wasn't willing to try too much with DC1 as overthought everything and struggled on for way too long. DC2, whole new perspective 🙈

Congratulations on your little one!

We had this for the first 3 months when my DS was born last year - we were constantly told he 'just had colic'. I would feed him, hold him up for 20 mins while he fell asleep but 20 mins after putting him down he would be awake again.

Eventually we realised it was silent reflux! He was also formula fed by this point so we tried using an anti reflux formula. It was a complete game changer for us! We all finally got some sleep!

Also what brand formula are you using? We always used Aptamil but eventually moved to Hipp Organic which suited him much better! It seemed to froth up a lot less.

Currently just put my 10 week old down 😂 hes doing the exact same. Think some babies are just like that as my 1st was fine 2nd and 3rd have done this

Instead of the Next to Me, have you tried having her in bed right next to you? Sleep on your side, curled up in a C shape like a croissant, baby tucked against you.

This is us as well. She's been passed out on me since 3 but if we put her down she grunts and writhes. I'm so tired!

I have an 18 month old, the sleepless nights haven't ended. In fact, I think they're worse she has her own will now and if she doesn't want to sleep, she just won't. I've been a zombie at work for 9 months now.

It is awful, but I just told myself that it is is what it is and one day it will end, it's not forever.

As someone else said, have you tried swaddling? That did help DD when she was a lot smaller, you can get swaddling sleeping bags.

I was going to suggest swaddling, it's the only thing that worked for us!

My sympathy op, I had two kids that were scrappy sleepers, one was up every two hours until nearly one. I was so so tired and I posted here and thought it would never end. The good news is that it eventually does and you just have to muddle along until it does with whatever works for you.
Today at the youngest age three is the first time ever that I have had to wake them up in the morning at seven.
Mine slept better, a bit!, when put into own rooms at just past six months,so hang onto that idea for hope.

We were using the grosnug things that swaddle them but she’s almost grown out of it. Might have to go back to it though incase that’s what helps her sleep!
She is currently on Aptamil which she seems to be ok with. She is sicky but it’s usually if she has a trapped burp.
Up for the day now (even though I’ve been up since 1) and she’s going back to sleep on me already!
I do try to tell myself it’s not forever, feels like it is at the moment though!

Hello all, I know this thread is over a year old but just wondering what happened with your little ones? I too have a non sleeping 9 week old. But as well as not wanting to sleep in her next t to me crib, she fights sleep like a demon and needs rocking and bouncing to sleep everytime she wakes. she used to fall fast asleep on us, but now just wriggles and squirms. This is my second baby and my first was nothing like this! help!!!!!! .