Toddler screams like a banshee at bedtime

[pegasus02]

DD is 20 months and a bit, and has never been a good sleeper. We have a good bedtime routine, which is bath, breastfeed, cot. We used to have a story too but she cries now when we do this, so it's been shelved.

This all worked ok until a few weeks ago. The breastfeed used to take 10-15 mins, and she'd drop off or become drowsy, I'd pop her into the cot, and she'd fall asleep. Sometimes she might have a little cry, but settle quickly.

NOW - she will chomp down on my breast and just not let go. After 20 mins, I will try to disengage but she grips ever harder. I then forcibly remove myself from her mouth, and pop her into the cot. She then screams hysterically. I'm at my wit's end and would prefer to just let her scream, but DH doesn't like that and now sits with her until she's asleep. This can take 30, 40 mins. It's not ideal.

Anyone have experience of this? Is it a phase? What can I do?

Bump

Have you tried any white noise? It was life changing for us - loads of apps and the vacuum cleaner noise is a favourite in our house

Would she have a cup of milk instead of feeding? Maybe your partner could do bedtime with milk and a story to see if that works. It's so hard when they randomly change things.

Also any chance there's some teething happening?

Thanks for the replies. White noise doesn't work on DD sadly. We have a sad, unused Ewan. It's not teething either, as she's generally happy during the day and she can now tell us when her teeth are sore.

It's likely separation anxiety, but why is she so afraid?