11 week old baby will only sleep on me!

[Xxbekixx]

Hi there,

My 11 week old baby will only sleep on me. Up until one month old, she slept in her sleepyhead/cot on and off for three hour stretches. Then she suddenly rejected it and ever since we just haven't been able to get her to sleep for any length of time anywhere but on us.

I spend most nights staying up until 4am putting her in and out of the cot, until I finally give up and let her sleep on me. She will go into the cot, but after 45 minutes she wakes up and unless she is picked up quite quickly, will go crazy and cry for another 45 minutes.

She has had reflux issues but we have tilted the cot and she is on strong medication... she likes to take her naps in a sling or the pram and also wakes after 45 but we can rock her back to sleep. We wondered if it's because she wants to be on her tummy so tried that in the day (when we can watch her) but again, only 45 mins and she is awake.

I can't cope with her sleeping on me much longer! We have tried cot/sleepyhead/Moses basket/cocoonbaby and each time it's the same. Also tried swaddling/white noise/water bottle/hand ok chest/top with my scent on it. No idea what to do next!!!

She won't even sleep in the bed next to me - it's only on us that she will do. Any help appreciated.

Everyone says it will get better but she is actually doing less and less time in the cot...

My baby is 5m now and when he was tiny he just wanted to sleep on me. A couple of times I propped pillows under my arms so I half slept half awake with him on my chest and with arms propped up so he couldn’t roll away but I was freaking out doing it. Poor little things, all they know is our warmth and they know they’re safe in our arms (even though no predators exist in our homes). We ended up putting the sleepyhead between us in our huge superking bed (no alcohol or Smoking) and he slept in it quite happily between us but on his back and couldn’t roll anywhere and we couldn’t roll on him. Of course plenty of night wakings for food (ebf) but would sleep for longer and longer chunks.
Now, he starts with bath time and a feed and bedtime between 6-7pm, and will sleep in sleepyhead & next2me til we come upstairs (had to start settling upstairs and use a monitor from 3months as he wouldn’t settle downstairs once he understood bedroom was bedtime). Usually ends up sleeping with me after 3am as wants boob for comfort/food. I follow the safety guidelines. Everyone has their own opinion on sleeping and it’s so difficult, being terrified of sids, wanting sleep and knowing your baby just wants to be snuggled.
He is gradually getting better and better with his night sleep and I’m glad I manage a few hours in the evening to get stuff done, but his daytime naps are awful! 45 mins if I’m lucky. They’re only little once and each phase passes.

@Feedmylambs thank you - I have tried co sleeping via sleepyhead in my bed and also in my bed curled around her. I don't know why but she will not sleep on her back for more than 40 mins. She wakes up even if I put her sleeping on me on her back... I don't know the way around it tbh... I feel like I have tried everything... I worry there is something going on with her digestion that is stopping her sleeping on her back...

Maybe take her to see a cranial osteopath if you can afford to.

We are having the same issue and like you have tried absolutely everything we possibly can! It's completely exhausting! Our baby is now 7 weeks and we started getting some sleep around 3 weeks by cosleeping with baby on her side. I follow the guidelines as much as possible (no drugs, alcohol, duvet, pillows etc.), but like you our baby will not settle on her back even when cosleeping. I sleep with her cuddled up to me on her side whilst I am in the protective c shape. We are tummy to tummy so she cannot roll onto her front, and if she ever rolls onto her back and stays asleep then bonus! Her head is lined up slightly above my boobs, I always check that her face is away from my body to minimise the risk. I essentially let her fall asleep on my chest and then I roll onto my side and that's where she stays!

I know it's not what's 'safe' on the guidelines and some will disagree with us doing this, but in the end for us it seemed like the safest option (rather than her rolling off us when we inevitably fell asleep with her on the chest).

My DS was/is exactly the same still at 7 months. Now he's sturdier, he sleeps on his side but he will not tolerate being on his back. Prior to this, we had to sleep him on his front but I barely slept through watching him 😩

The problem with guidelines is it’s a one fists all approach, some adults don’t like sleeping on their backs and prefer side and or front sleeping... @Xxbekixx there’s also something called an Amby nest hammock or Poco hanmock, I bought one in desperation back in August when ds was weeks old, the idea is the baby is suspended and it’s womb like and when they stir it jiggles about and they essentially rock themselves back to sleep. Didn’t work with ds but others swear by them, worth a look? As it’s a hammock it’s very gently curved rather than completely flat. I’m now using the frame with a bouncer adapter as ds enjoys using his legs

Pricey to buy new @Xxbekixx but quite a few on eBay if you can pick up or arrange a courier and there are new mattress replacements too.