Putting down a sleeping baby - aggghh!

[littlebabybum]

Sat here with baby on the boob (4mnths) and want to but her down to bed, this will be the fifth time tonight since 6.45. First time she slept for 30 mins, every other time she's woken up immediately and bawled.

I've tried bouncing/rocking her to sleep and feeding to sleep, both result in awakenings and my spirit being slowly destroyed!

Any tips? Or similar tales of woe?

Laying them in the blanket they're already in also works as everyone has said. We had Tippitoes Star Wraps for ours and they pretty much lived in them. No change from being held to being laid down because they were still snuggled up.

Oh yes I forgot about that one, putting your Pyjamas in their bed too!

My 8 month old is currently asleep on me. The second I put him down he will wake up. He has to go down stone cold asleep or he will wake up and howl.

I wish I could say it gets better if you believe that twat Gina Ford then we are terrible parents for not putting then down "drowsy but awake" and letting them get to sleep by themselves. From day 1. alright then Gina love

@turnthebiglightoff Eeeek! You just said the banned words. Thou shalt not utter the words G### F### on MN. She threw a hissy for years ago when mums on here voices an opinion that a woman who has never had her own baby should tell us not to look ours in the eye, not to hold them when they want holding, to only feed them on a strict schedule and then of course that belter of a divorced woman telling us on national TV that we should not deprive our husbands of sex after birth. We shouldn't let the new baby come between the relationship. We apparently should have sex as early as six weeks and "grin and bear it" to keep our men happy.

Sorry, "should not tell us not to look our baby in the eyes..."

@littlebabybum I feel your pain. My LO is 5 months. Always been a terrible sleeper. 4 month regression was awful. Woke every 40 mins. Currently LO will wake every 2 hours. Sometimes more. Sometimes less. It's awful.
We cosleep. I'm just hoping for a miracle.

Some great tips thank you! My husband ended up taking her for a few hours so I could get some sleep and she is now sleeping on me, mouth clamped on nipple 😂

I understand comments re fourth trimester etc, but if that's the case, why don't all babies do this? All the others I know are now settling into fairly good night time sleeping pattens, whereas we have none, however hard I try with routine etc!

@Instagrump I know she is universally sneered at usually. On my sons second night home from the hospital, my husband read me a chapter of GF (a shit gift) just to make me laugh. It worked. I've never heard so much crap in my life.

@littlebabybum I really believe you get the baby you get; some will sleep well at night, some will nap well during the day, etc etc and some may do both. Very few do though. I k ow a lot of parents who say their baby sleeps through from a young age but when pressed they say "from midnight to 5am". I'd rather a 7-7 sleeper with 2 or 3 wake ups, like mine, to be honest! Babies that little still believe you are one being together. They don't learn about separation or distance til later.

I wouldn't mind her waking up a couple of times a night either, it's the fact I can't put her down full stop which is so difficult :(

It's so tough isn't it? Mines the same, seven months and still refuses to be put down... we're co-sleeping at the moment, which is fine, but I'm still not getting much sleep! And I'll miss him when I eventually get him out of my bed haha

I reckon the little buggers come fitted with mercury tilt switches, and remote heat sensors that detect when you have just picked up a fresh hot cup of tea.
My 7mo is variable...sometimes a great sleeper, sometimes insists on sleeping o me half the night and wakes up the moment I ninja roll away. Co sleeping maximises sleep time for both of us though and I love it.

@littlebabybum I could have written this 2 years ago.

And I do spend more nights in beside DS than DH some weeks but tonight bed time was a sleepy story and he was off in 20 minutes just lying beside me and he's slept through 4 or 5 nights this week.

I BF til 21 mo over night, whenever he stirred, coslept and have never for a second thought about sleep training. And I was on my knees with exhaustion for months. But I now have a lovely little boy who is mostly delightful and like his mummy, sometimes doesn't sleep well and enjoys a snuggle. I can deal with this.

Ahhhh 4 months is a crap time for sleeping.
Things that worked for me were music softly playing and a hot water bottle in the crib for a few minutes to warm it up. Also SWADDLING....I think I would have died of sleep deprivation were it not for swaddling, which oddly DS hated when he was first born, and then suddenly loved it

Co-sleeping at night.

Sling during the day.

These were the only things that got me through 3 DC who were breastfed and would not be put down.

I just took her for a 1.5 hour walk as she gets so overtired and even on the boob she was fussing as I think she wants the comfort but not the actual feed.

We're in bed now and she's on me! I wouldn't mind if she was next to me, but when she's on me it's so hard to sleep, and I think her feeding on and off all night affects her wind.

I never know if I'm doing the right thing and feel guilty all the time. I know this is all a phase and every parents goes through stuff like this! I just didn't quite realise how hard it would be!!

This will sound completely crackers but I swear it worked with both of mine when they were babies.

I used to tell them, in a quiet voice, exactly what was happening, eg (I remember in particular) "DD1, Mummy's going to lift you out of your car seat and we're going to go inside, I'm here with you" or "I'm going to lay you down in your cot but I'm still here" and both of them would stay asleep. If I didn't tell them what I was doing they would wake up and scream.

Maybe I was lucky but might be worth a try?

That’s the Magda Gerber/Janet Lansbury RIE approach. It’s lovely.

Can you feed her lying down @littlebabybum? So she falls asleep next to you, rather than on you? It took me a while to master with ds1, but I’ve managed it from the off with ds2 (10weeks) and its a lifesaver. We lay down for the last feed & Fall asleep next to each other. (I follow all the safe co- sleeping guidance.)

My youngest had serious feeding problems so never fed to sleep. I didn’t know what to do as I’d always fed my eldest to sleep.
After the end of her sleepy newborn phase, I ended up swaddling her and laying her in her side car crib while stroking her and shushing, with a lullaby teddy and white noise.
She used to thrash around a bit and complain a bit but didn’t actually cry much (I used to pick her up for a cuddle if she cried, then put her back down). She would go to sleep eventually though it often took a while.
She seemed to wake less though as when she did wake, she was in the same position so just used to go back to sleep. When my eldest woke and wasn’t in my arms being fed, she’d cry and need to be fed back to sleep.

Maybe baby is too excited for Christmas and can't sleep .

Sorry I shouldn't joke, but mine are all 5-15 now and I do remember those horrific sleepless stages. Really hope you get some rest soon, it's awful.

OP, have you tried breastfeeding lying down on your side in bed?
Mine was EXACTLY the same as yours. She's 16 months now and we co-slept from 3 months and it's only in the last few weeks she's been sleeping in her cot. I can actually put her in there awake and sit next to her, sometimes giving her a little pat and shh and she falls asleep by herself without boob!
I don't know what the answer is, maybe I should've persevered when she was younger but I just went with what felt right and it's been quite easy to get her in her cot. She just must've been ready 🤷🏼‍♀️
Also, if she falls asleep on boob now, I put her down in the cot and she stirs but goes back to sleep! That would've never happened before!

Thanks for the tips, I'll try some tomorrow. My DH is in bed with us tonight so can't try feeding lying down but I will tomorrow.

I'm so hot and uncomfortable, and I just can't sleep properly I feel so claustrophobic.

Aww it’s hard
I spent hours & hours trying to put my eldest down - couldn’t do it until she was in her second sleep cycle & then —on the rare occasion it worked— she’d just want fed again in about 20 mins. I gave up & it was much easier; with the rest of my kids I just let them sleep/BF on my knee in the evening then took them to bed with me. They were still terrible sleepers but I got a bit more horizontal time & more time sitting watching rubbish

Not sure why you can’t feed lying down with DH there? I just kept me between DH & baby.

I spent the night last night with my drug withdrawing fostered baby, at present my chest is the only place the baby settles, I feel for you OP lack of sleep is crippling.