Toddler such hard work to get back to sleep during the night

[bez91]

Hi all, my daughter has just turned 2, always been an early riser - 5am territory since birth. More recently we've seen 4:30ams which has been fun - the most recent 4:30 wake ups are probably just a phase. We've tried everything to tackle the early waking to no avail and we now just live with it.

Another thing that has always been a problem is waking in the night. It's probably once or twice a week but when she does it takes at least 2 hours for her to settle back to sleep and has recently got worse. She's not always upset she just lays there in her cot just generally rolling around messing about, we lay in the room with her but it just takes forever for her to seem like she's tired again.
I remember a phase of this when she was about 6 months. I think it's referred to as a split night but I thought we were past that now being 2. If she wakes anytime past 3am then due to her early rising we're up for the day. Bringing her into bed with us to get a bit of sleep in a no go as she will just mess about wide awake and again take 2 hours to settle.

Not particularly looking for solutions as like with most sleep related things they're are t any but wonderer if anyone else has experienced this?

I envy parents who say their toddler will just fall straight back to sleep in their bed!

This sounds really tough. Personally though there is no way I'd be hanging out in a 2 year olds room for 2 hours at 3am while they roll around in their cot and mess about. I would just leave them to it.

@1300cakes that would be great if she didn't scream the house down everytime we left the room

Gosh it's tough isn't it . I admit I have used ear plugs in that situation but I understand that's not something everyone can do or wants to do.

I maybe wouldn't use earplugs but would 100% let her cry it out at this point. She needs to learn to fall asleep on her own and way better to teach her while she is still in a cot and can't come into your room.

When she wakes check her if she calls for you (don't check if she is just playing/talking). Ask her if she needs anything. Once she has what she needs (water, stuffy, nothing, etc) say you are tired and going back to bed and you will see her in the morning. Leave the room and stick to it. She will learn after a few days.

For the early waking have you tried a gro clock or similar?

Does your daughter settle better if she sleeps with you? I'll probably be flamed for saying this but, honestly, I had no trouble because mine slept with me and husband way beyond the age of two. It can be frightening for small children and babies to wake up without the comfort of mum and dad. At your daughter's age it isn't unusual to co-sleep with parents & in other cultures it's quite the usual and normal thing. Alternatively you could have a cot next to your bed.

It's marvellous if a baby/toddler is happy to sleep in their own room and doesn't wake early but an awful lot don't. If you read all the threads on Mumsnet you'll realise that your child is quite normal but needs your presence. It doesn't last forever but it is actually quite cosy to have your child next to you whilst sleeping. If you did that the 4.30am business would cease because she would be reassured.

to cheer you up and to fortify you.

Is she still napping in the day OP and if so how long for? Could she be undertired?

Hi all

Thanks for your responses

@vivapuff tried a Gro Clock these last 5 weeks or so. It's been a disaster, she absolutely gets the concept, loves the clock and kisses it every night before bed but can't help herself if she gets up before the sun to cry until we go into her, we've been reiterating the concept of it for that duration and now may just take it away as it seems more counter productive. May take the hard stance with letting her cry but it really would go on for hours, she works herself up into such a state to the point of nearly being sick - our poor neighbours!

@Bluerussian as I mentioned, when she comes into bed with us she just messes about whatever the time. Pulls our eyes open, asks to be tickled - just generally thinks it's play time. I would co-sleep from her going to bed the only problem being my husband is up for work early each morning so it would disturb her but I really wish that would make her settle!

@Moonshine160 I don't think it's under-tiredness. Probably more likely over tiredness. She'll have a nap each day from around 12 for 1-2 hours. I have thought about cutting the nap out all together but I think she's too young. She has about 9 hours sleep a night and I don't think she'd manage without the nap as she has so little sleep on a night

Mine stopped napping at 18 months. I'd cut her daytime nap out and see if that makes any difference.

I'm up at buggery o'clock in the morning because I've got the same problem. Just-turned-2 DD woke up, is convinced there's a party going on outside her room, wants to join it. I'm giving her 5 minutes ranting, a quick cuddle and reassurance, 5 minutes ranting...sometimes that works. Tonight it's not.

At 2 I’d cut the day time nap if not sleeping at night, maybe let her have 30 mins max.