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About to give up trying to wean 9 month old off dummy - help!

3 replies

milena10 · 04/12/2019 15:21

Hi all,

I’m currently on day 4 of trying to wean my 9 month old off the dummy during her nap and bed times as her sleep (and mine) was becoming more and more disrupted with her waking up looking for it until I would go in her room and give to her. She’s only ever had dummy at bed times. Weaning is not going well though and I’m loosing all my patience, feel really cruel and about to give up and just give in!

Everywhere I read they say their babes were weaned off after 2-3 nights but we’re not having any luck. She’s fallen asleep fine at night without it but I think it’s because she’s just so tired at that point! Last night she slept through the night (with one usual dream feed), other 2 nights awake crying for dummy between 4-6am, eventually settling with me by her side patting her back. Naps are the absolute worst though! Either taking 2 hours+ to fall asleep or not falling asleep at all! She’s getting more and more upset as days go on too, not less Confused

Really don’t want for us both to have gone through all that last few days for nothing. I also can’t do the getting up 3-4 times a night fetching her dummy once I go back to work soon. I just don’t understand what I’m doing wrong!? Could it be she’s just too attached to dummy? Or just not ready developmentally?

NB: Using comforter at bedtime she’s had for months (sometimes nibbles on it but generally doesn’t care for it). She’s not unwell, not teething right now and not going through any other changes / times of transition. When crying for dummy I’m using controlled crying, lullaby music and sitting by her cot shushing her or stroking her back/ tummy. Already tried sprinkling dummies in her cot at night but she’d still want me to put it in Hmm

If anyone has any word of advice, please help a mama out!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ClaraMumsnet · 05/12/2019 20:47

Hi OP, giving this a little bump for you Flowers

Blippolbblopp · 05/12/2019 20:57

Aw no advice but didnt want to read and run. So is it mainly because she wont put it back in herself? If thats the main reason you want her off it, have you thought about a dummy clip?

My DD cried for so long about her dummy, it took her a good 7-10 days to settle without it, i wasnt even trying to wean her, shed popped hers and wouldnt accept any other, i bought loads of new ones and everything 🤦‍♀️

With DS i took his off him at 10 months because that was the same age DD was, he was about the same, took a good week to settle without it. It makes sense though doesnt it especially if theyve had one since birth

milena10 · 02/03/2020 11:20

Thanks so much for your reply @Blippolbblopp I really appreciated it! She just wouldn't even try to find the dummies once one was out and would fuss and cry until I would get it for her :( I wasn't sure about dummy clips re: safety at night.... After 5 days of tears and almost pulling my hair out I gave in, brough more dummies to sprinkle in her cot (she now has 4 which seems to be a good number). She did get much better at finding them herself after that and started to sleep through the night soon after- who knows it if was because of that or just was developmentally ready.... now when she wakes in the night it's for other reasons (teething mainly!). You are right, it makes sense that it would be so hard for them to self-sooth without dummy if they've had it for so long. After that experience I personally believe she just wasn't ready as didn't have any other self-settling methods yet other than use of dummy, perhaps all these other babies I read about who weaned off dummy at her age after a couple of nights must have had other ways they self-settled, but it just wasnt time for my little one...

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