Am I doing this ALL wrong?

[Bronnie2018]

I feel so lost right now. I don't know if I've been putting my DD, now 16 months down for a nap - one nap now - too late in the day. Resulting in a late bedtime and a vicious cycle ...or if that's just how it is!!! All babies are different! But how come some are in bed at 7.30pm and wake at 7.30am

Our routine
Wake 7.30am
Naps anywhere between 12.30 and 1.30 - usually a good 2 hours
Bedtime routine at 7pm.. bath, books..etc
Doesn't usually go down till 9pm. Sometimes 10pm.
Will sleep through usually if not teething until I wake her at 7.30am. I have to wake her!

I was hoping that she would go down at 7.30pm. This has never been the case!!

I've heard some babies nap at 10.30am for 90mjns and then last till 7.30pm when they crash out.

I don't know if I have followed the totally wrong routine!

As I said at a loss and feel like a shit Mum.

Thanks for letting me rant.

Nap sounds fine. Can you not just have a later bedtime

What happens if you put her to bed at 7.30pm?

Or you could try waking from the nap a bit earlier if you wanted

Doesnt sound like she is tired enough at 7.30pm. Options are a) limit nap length, b) later bedtime

I think babies that go down at 7.30 and have a nap get much much earlier than 7.30 in the morning.

When she drops her nap she will start going to bed much earlier in the evening.

Thanks so much for all your replies. I didn't think anyone would answer me as it's probably quite dull compared to some of the problems I've read with no napping/ no sleeping Bubs!!

If I put her down for 7.30pm she doesn't seem tired at all and will just fuss.

I did try waking her after 90 mins for her nap. She then woke after 2 hours of being asleep at night...she was also quite grumpy for the rest of the afternoon!

I do see some yawns at around 10.30am but Unsure if it's too soon for a nap after a wake up of 7.30am

Wish I'd know about the 7.30am wakers being awake much much earlier!!!

What do you mean by fuss? My DD goes down at 7pm and doesn't wake until 7.30/8am (sometimes earlier but she happily plays in her cot until then) AND she has a nap every day (1 hour at nursery, 2-3 hours at home!) but when I put her down she plays, sings, chats and "reads" for anything from 10 minutes to over an hour depending on how tired she is. Sometimes she gets a bit grumbly if she's finding it hard to go over but I only go into her if she's crying. If we keep her up any later she's overtired and hyper. That downtime seems to do her good and is good training for when she's a bit older. So. I guess what I'm saying is letting her fuss a bit - if she's not distressed - isn't necessarily a bad thing as she might learn to entertain herself for a little while before she drops off.

Sounds like she is naturally a bit more of a night owl. My DS is past naps now but cannot cope being awake after 7pm and now that he has dropped his nap he barely makes it to 6pm. However he has never slept in after 7am, if he makes it to 6am I'm happy.

Is it causing you any issues? Our situation works for my family because he gets a good hour with daddy in the morning. If it ain't broke dont fix it!

That's pretty much our schedule too most days apart from not trying to put them down earlier or deliberately waking them in the morning! I like it though and might have encouraged it if it didn't happen naturally. Mine are 2 and 4 and the 4 year old only naps a couple of times a week now. If it isn't causing a problem, I wouldn't change it and would just move the bedtime routine to suit her preferred bedtime. Enjoy the chance to have a lie in sometimes.

You could try waking him up slightly earlier (7am) to see if that has any effect. Make sure he's getting plenty of fresh air and running around outside time when he wakes from his nap.
The main thing I would try to do is to get him to associate his bedtime routine with going to sleep, so, if at the moment he's not going to sleep until 9pm, start his bath, teeth, PJ's, books routine at 8.30. Once he's got into a good habit of dropping off to sleep shortly after that, for a week or two, you can start nudging the whole routine slightly earlier, 8.20 for a couple of days, then 8.10.

If she goes to sleep earlier will she wake earlier? Ds wok about 5.30am whatever his bedtime.

Apologies - just noticed it's a little girl not a boy!

@peachgreen sorry fussing sounds quite light chattering or something!
She will just cry rather than chat or play etc.

I have tried a quiet bedtime starting at 8pm after bath... but takes me an hour to settle her down. She'll then wake after 2 hours usually. I'm just wondering if an early morning nap would help? A nap finishing at around 3.30pm maybe that's have a big impact? Again she doesn't seem tired till around 12 ...oh this is so frustrating

Ahh okay. In that case I think all you can do is move her day back by maybe 15 minutes at a time each day until you're happier with her bedtime. So slightly earlier nap, slightly earlier bed. She might still sleep as long or she might start waking earlier. The fact that you're waking her now in the mornings suggests to me she does need an earlier night but it just might take a little while to get her into it. Good luck!