Help please. DS is 20 months old. 3 nights ago I went to fetch his dummy, did the nightly "pull" test and found quite a few small holes. Checked 3 out of the remaining 4 and they were all the same/ on the verge of holing including the 2 new ones I bought in the last week or so! (He's been grinding his teeth and chewing them). Bugger.
Prior to this, DS would be put in his cot (actually very willing to get in) and that would be that, sometimes a wake or two in the night but a quick pat and "re-plug" and jobs a good 'un.
We have a good bed time routine; bath, books bottle and he's in his cot same time every night with his 2 soft toys. He has rarely had his dummy for naps for about 2 months including at nursery, as the plan was to remove dummy around 2yo (his teeth have already started moving).
Well we're three nights in and it's getting worse every night! He understands dummy is "broken" (a new word to him he's been using a lot) and I cut the end off one of them to show him. There was no tears and he has never asked for a dummy again after that initial 5 mins. BUT he understandably can't settle by himself now.
Night 1: he went straight down, woke within 20 mins and I sat with him quietly for 20 mins until he fell asleep again. Woke once in the night and OH sat with him for about an hour (occasional pat if he whimpered) before he finally settled. Woke up usual time in the morning happy.
Night 2: this is probably where we fucked up. We did some CIO in the past (we were spending HOURS patting him and trying to sneak out), my hazy memory says it was fine but it probably wasnt. Into his cot, i stayed for 2 mins, he cried for 5, I stayed for 5, he cried for 10 (repeat several times) then by this point I was feeling awful so i went in and sat with him and he was asleep by 8 mins. Through the night he woke once but it was about 2 hours to settle him - at points he was more whining but that progressed to proper tears so in the end I stayed for half an hour until he fell asleep. Woke up happy at usual time. But I'm a bag of nerves and guilt ridden.
Night 3: (having had a good day and the best nursery nap in ages might I add, though maybe he was just shattered) crying instantly on the way up to bed. I immediately feel bad. OH left him for to cry for 5 then 10 minutes at a time watch him. OH says his eyes were dry and it did sound more whiney than actual upset. But over time he's getting more upset (maybe 45 mins have passed at this point) and now sobbing so in the end I go in and sit with him until he falls asleep. OH says he was up loads during the night but even though he was sitting with him DS was just sitting up looking at him half the time and it was frustrating. At 5am left him to cry for 5 mins then I sat with him for 10 mins until he slept.
It's our inconsistency isn't it? I feel just awful for him, I was SO close to giving him the one remaining dummy but a) we've come this far and b) he could chew through that perhaps in a night and it's a bloody danger.
I just dont know what's best to do for him. We have no issue sitting with him when he first goes to bed but when we're losing hours during the night and working full time it's just a nightmare. Feeling like a shit mum.