Post Natal Insomnia

[1990cat]

Help! So after giving birth over a week ago (traumatic birth) I have been feeling a mix of ups and downs mostly downs. I seem to have got over the baby blues now. The sleep deprivation is killing me but the real problem is post natal insomnia...
Me and my partner having being doing 'shifts' in the night and day but when ever he sends me off to bed I can not switch off and sleep. Tonight the inlaws took our 10 day old baby out the house for a 5 hours and told me so sleep and all i have done is lie with my eyes closed relaxing for all this time but not once could I nod off.
Ive tried to Karms tablets and tried the whole dimmed lighting etc etc but nothing seems to work.
Has anyone any suggestions or even advise and support that it does get better in time. Like I say the lack of sleep (literally having 2-3 hours a night) is killing me but when I have so much offer of help and still can't nod off is even harder right now. Is it still early days? Will my body clock figure it out soon?
Hoping to hear some supporting advise xx

I’m sorry I have no real advice but I had exactly the same thing. I think it was partly the pressure to sleep made it harder to sleep. Also I had anxiety and kept thinking I heard the baby crying even though she was somewhere else.

Maybe take the pressure off, use the time to have a bath or something instead?

It did get better with time. Earplugs also helped as I recall, made me feel more “off duty”.

Thank you. Just to hear it gets better gives me hope. Funnily enough I actually dozed off after Baby did tonight for an hour with him so at least I have re-fueled a little. X

I had the exact same thing. It definitely gets better xx

Had this too, I think it’s Adrenalin and hormones. It does get better and I agree resting helps. Hope you feel better soon

Sound stupid. But like a baby you to can get over tired.
Stick a sleep story on, pillow mist on your pillow and maybe a kalms tablet to help. Breath, count sheep and think about anything but sleep xx

I had the exact same situation and it got better. Whenever my husband would take the baby and allow me some sleep time I would lay there worrying about not sleeping, which meant I didn't sleep. It improved loads, but to be honest it did take a while for me.

No advice I'm afraid but just wanted to say that you're not alone and that it does improve.

It's not the worlds best solution but my second child was a non sleeper until he was two and when I was on my knees I used to take an antihistamine to help me sleep when he wasn't in my sole care and I needed some rest. The piriton type makes me drowsy so I would take one of them before bed. Not sure this would be ok with breastfeeding though, I did it when he was older.

My new baby is a week old and I've had about three hours sleep max a night for the last couple of weeks, so I totally know how you're feeling. I can't nap, I don't think I've napped in my adult life, so if I get chance I just try to switch off with some mindless tv or an audiobook instead of napping - it's still a 'rest' but without the pressure to sleep.

Glad to hear you got a nap OP. Yes I also found it easier to sleep with baby asleep next to me than with them somewhere else. Maybe due to the anxiety. Sounds like that might work for you.

For me breastfeeding makes me sleepy, I'm guessing it's the hormones. If you're not breastfeeding I'd imagine that skin to skin may have the same effect. I'd try taking baby to bed, skin to skin and then your DH taking baby back as you start to feel drowsy. I also do think it's normal to not be able to settle well because you're on high alert for the baby crying etc.

Thank you everyone. Good to hear that it does get better.
Im feeling postive for another good night tonight as I have felt so much better agter getting a few hours last night so havent needed to force myself to nap today
Thank you x

@1990cat just reading this thread and this is just what I’m going through now? Did it get better ?
I got the point I only slept 3 broken hours in 3 days and had to go on a low dose sedating AD which has helped me sleep but I’m now anxious I’ll never sleep again without the aid of a tablet . I never had an issue with sleep until now not even in my previous pregnancy x

Hi @saz231 how old is your baby? I am still struggling with postnatal insomnia nearly 6 months after having my dd but its not as bad as it was. In the very early days i was barely sleeping ( an hour here here and there!!) but i also felt so so ill and my resting heart rate used to be literally over 120bpm even when trying to relax and sleep. Im on a supposedly sedating AD too (mirtazapine) but iv never found it makes me drowsy, my sleep has just slowly improved over time (its still bad but nowhere near AS bad). I still have nights regularly like last night where i just could not for the life of me drop off until silly o clock.
I think it is just one of those things that eventually resolves itself as i never had issues before my dd...i really dont want to be like this forever.
One thing is for certain though i will never have another as it would genuinely finish me off.

@Isababybel my DD is 4 months this all started when she was 7 weeks old I caught covid and couldn’t breathe as im asthmatic it terrified me . I initially thought I’d been so scared I couldn’t sleep but I feel I’m over that now but still can’t sleep. I’ve been on 15mg mirtazapene for 6 weeks and it’s helped me sleep 7/8 hours on and off . What dose are you on ? I think they make me more anxious though . I can’t figure if this is something hormonal or from the covid as loads of people with long covid have bad insomnia too. I just feel lost really I don’t want to live a life reliant on something to help me sleep when I’ve never had an issue before even with my DS 2 years ago I still slept fine and he was a dreadful sleeper. I’m the same I certainly won’t be doing this again .
Did yours just start out the blue ?? X

[quote Saz231]@Isababybel my DD is 4 months this all started when she was 7 weeks old I caught covid and couldn’t breathe as im asthmatic it terrified me . I initially thought I’d been so scared I couldn’t sleep but I feel I’m over that now but still can’t sleep. I’ve been on 15mg mirtazapene for 6 weeks and it’s helped me sleep 7/8 hours on and off . What dose are you on ? I think they make me more anxious though . I can’t figure if this is something hormonal or from the covid as loads of people with long covid have bad insomnia too. I just feel lost really I don’t want to live a life reliant on something to help me sleep when I’ve never had an issue before even with my DS 2 years ago I still slept fine and he was a dreadful sleeper. I’m the same I certainly won’t be doing this again .
Did yours just start out the blue ?? X[/quote]
I have read that covid insomnia is definitely a thing, its not surprising really as struggling to breathe sounds terrifying.
I am on 30mg of mirtazapine, initially 15mg but neither dose has made me sleepy :(
My sleep issues started the second dd was born, i had no sleep the night i had her and about 2 broken hours the following few nights.
I just cant get my mind to switch into sleep mode some nights even though im soo tired. My mood is always on the floor when i haven't slept well, like i end up thinking quite dark things.
Ive just ordered some melatonin to try, have you had any experience with it? If that doesn't work then i dont know what else to try.
Fingers crossed we both get more sleep soon!

@Isababybel yes there’s so many people suffering with it but the doctors just say I have post natal depression . I was absolutely fine and slept alright until I caught covid .
I heard that 30mg makes you more awake and 15mg is more effective for sleep but if you have tried that already then that is no good. I’m up and down on mine some nights I crash out and others I am waking loads . I’ve been having acupuncture so I don’t know if that’s had a positive impact .
I know what you mean about been wide awake and can’t switch off I’ve tried all the calm and headspace meditations rain water noises etc and it just irritated me more . I spoke to a lovely mental health nurse at the perinatal team who said scrap all the nightly rituals and just lay there focus on a random letter and tell yourself you are resting even if your not sleeping it did help me abit . I’m the same though I feel like I can’t cope if I get no sleep and I’ll eventually die of exhaustion . I hope you are talking to somebody if you are getting bad thoughts has the doc referred you to the perinatal team ?? I just really hope it’s hormones I’m so up and down today and that it corrects itself I still get the palpitations you talk about when I just try and nap and which is impossible . As for melatonin no not tried it . Have you tried taking a herbal nytol with your mirtazapene ?? x

Hi all. I'm really struggling with insomnia. I cannot fall asleep at night or for a nap without anxiety and adrenaline rushes. The doctors put me on an ssri (escitalopram) which was meant to help but still have me on benzodiazepines which I'm not thrilled about.
I wasn't this anxious before I stopped sleeping. It started when I had to stop taking my anti emetic (prochloperazine) for hyperemesis. I'm so worried how I'm going to cope not sleeping with a newborn who needs breastfeeding every few hours. I feel like I'm going crazy and I don't know how to fix it.
The current state of the world hasn't helped my headspace but I just feel like everything's spiralling off the back of not being able to fall asleep. Any advice please

@302stacey you sound the same as me I’ve never experienced this before . I’m on 15mg mirtazapene which has helped me sleep the last 6 weeks and fall back asleep after getting up to my babies . It’s so hard to cope I was surviving on 3 hours sleep in 3 days when it started but I’m now so anxious about not ever being able to sleep again without a tablet as like you i can’t nap my body shoots adrenaline and jolts me awake . Is your ssri a drowsy one ? I just hope this is something hormonal that rectifies itself for us at some point but I totally feel your pain . It’s such a horrible thing to experience it’s terrified me x

@Saz231 I think that maybe being pregnant in a pandemic and our brains being given loads of "danger danger" information maybe did something?! I saw a sleep psychologist and she called it hyperarousal and said I need to do things in the day to relax and bring my stress levels down (kind of hard in a pandemic in lockdown with a toddler and a growing bump!). I'm hoping the medicine (it isn't drowsying no) and having the baby will help ease it. But I just don't know how I am going to make sure I get sleep when the baby is here as I can't take benzodiazepines forever. It's so annoying not being able to nap and it is just like when you relax your brain kicks in that "danger danger" hyperarousal mode!
I am trying cbt to reframe my thoughts around sleep but that's all about not chasing sleep which is hard when you're not getting it!
How did you find starting the mirtazapine? I heard you get really bad food cravings from it and coming off it can be tricky? Any side effects? So you can wake up to baby to feed and then go back to sleep? What dose are you on if you don't mind me asking?

@302stacey ah your still pregnant bless you , I thought you had just had the baby . I know it’s easier said then done but please try relax as much as you can . I know how it is though I have a 2 year old and a 4 month old . You maybe read above but I’ve been diagnosed with exactly the same by the perinatal doctor basically I was fine until I caught covid when my baby was 7 weeks . I was so terrified by it and not being able to breathe I was scared to sleep my body got stuck in the danger state as you put it and no matter when I tried to drop off I would jolt awake . Oddly though I would randomly end up napping for about 2 hours during the night but not remember it was only when my husband told me I’d been asleep I didn’t remember him talking to me. I’m the same as you so scared to be reliant on a tablet . I got so bad I was prescribed diazepam which didn’t work , then zopliclone which helped me sleep for a week but didn’t reset my sleep pattern so I didn’t want to become addicted . Mirtazapene was the last option I’m on 15mg as they said the lower doses are used for sleep and anxiety . I had some acupuncture aswell and on the second night I slept 8 hours on it still wake up to baby but I could settle again . I haven’t had any side effects other then feeling slightly more anxious bizarrely but that’s understanding in the current circumstances I think . I just want someone to tell me I will sleep again unaided I’m worried I’ll be reliant on A tablet forever . They say you gain a lot on mirtazapene however I’ve maybe put 5lbs on in 7 weeks and it’s been Xmas so been eating chocolate etc so I’ve started on the treadmill this week and hoping it will come off again but I’m not eating loads at all. I just worry about coming off it and the withdrawal but I’ll cross that in the future. How long do you have left in your pregnancy ?? I really hope something starts to work for you x

@Saz231 it's so hard to relax! My mind is constantly going trying to work out how to fix this and I hat to try (I've tried a lot of things including acupuncture). It's so hard to accept! I'm sorry you got covid how awful!!! I just want them to tell me how to switch the hyperarousal state off but I imagine until we are out of lockdown and getting back to normal our brains just can't cope especially bringing babies in to the world during it? You're totally right and right now we need to just to do what we have to to get through this situation. I am strongly considering mirtazapine instead of the benzodiazepines as I'm scared about taking it for too long. I have three weeks left until my due date and I really want to enjoy it (had a miscarriage Christmas 2019) but it's been the hardest two months of my life since I stopped sleeping!!!!
Well done you as I know how hard this is!!! Happy to chat any time if you need Zx

@302stacey i totally get you on the relaxing part I find the more I sit and do nothing the more I think of sleep. It’s such a vicious cycle! I’m not sure the acupuncture does anything to be honest . I was the same I just couldn’t switch the hyperarousal off until I got some sleep. I’m not sure if sleeping tablets are safe in pregnancy but I found once i had them for a week ( it wasn’t amazing sleep) but it was better then 3 hours in 3days I could think more clearly my heart palpitations slowed as I wasn’t so exhausted . I then started the mirtazapene and went to bed like the perinatal counsellor told me thinking if I’m not asleep atleast I’m resting and that’s when I actually slept . I know it’s so hard though when you can’t sleep and you know you can’t physically nap too so you panic about the next day. Maybe mirtazapene if it’s safe for you now might be a good option to try if you can get some sleep and enjoy the last few weeks before baby arrives . I’m here to talk too and I hope one day soon we both can say we slept again . I’ve heard a lot of mention about Phenergan drowsy antihistamines on the long covid group as people are getting bad insomnia after catching covid . It’s like you say I think it’s such worrying times there’s no wonder people can’t sleep I just hope normality comes soon I’m definitely finding maternity hard this time it’s quite lonely with no baby groups x

@Saz231 oh wow really? God they know so little about the long term affects. This virus is going to fuck us up for years to come from long covid to mental health to the economical affect.
I am taking phenergan but only get four hours on it. They prescribed lorazepam but you can't take it long term. The side effects starting the escitalopram was so so hard it just scares me to try mirtazapine plus withdrawal if I have to come off the escitalopram first. I just don't know. But appreciate you sharing your experience thank you.
In hindsight I shouldn't have gotten pregnant in a pandemic. I truly thought it would be over by now. It is so isolating. We relocated to Hampshire from Hertfordshire and haven't made friends as been in lockdown. I had such an amazing time with my first child and the whole experience and baby groups and friends etc. This is going to be so bloody different. Adding the insomnia in too! It's so lovely talking to someone else in the same boat. I've been Googling like mad just looking for answers.

Yes there’s hundreds of people on this long covid group just can’t sleep and women’s periods etc totally stopping or starting again after years so it defo messes up your homes . They say you can get pre and postnatal insomnia through a hormone imbalance so it’s likely it’s all mixed and caused this . Oh yes like you say it’ll take years I think there will be thousands out there that end up on ADs .
No I totally get where you are coming from it’s an option atleast . Another random thing but I’ve researched every little thing like you constantly googling it’s a lonely thing insomnia isn’t it . I found these videos about retraining your vagus nerve on you tube which is linked to anxiety and hyperarousal it’s to do with eye movements have a look. I hope you get some sleep soon and good luck with the birth , you never know maybe childbirth might kick start something in your body and help you sleep again x

@302stacey as for pregnant in a pandemic I thought exactly the same , I don’t think any of us expected this to last so long . PM me if you want like you say it’s sort of reassuring knowing someone else gets it although I wouldn’t wish the lack of sleep on anyone x

@Saz231 how to I pm you? Sorry I'm new to this.