How can I stop breastfeeding my 8 month old to sleep!?

[mamatoizzywizzy]

Currently sat listening to my 8month old crying because I am refusing to BF her back to sleep 😩
She fell asleep at 7pm (being BF) and woke up an hour later wanting the boob to put her back to sleep again.
She's pretty good throughout the night and only wakes a couple of times and for the other times she wakes I can only presume she puts herself back to sleep again.

I really want to stop feeding her around 1years so feel I need to nip this "feeding to sleep thing" in the bud now 😩

I sometimes regret ever breastfeeding because of this - she has never accepted a dummy and only I can put her back to bed

Same boat 10 month old no advice!
Here for the help too!

Makes breastfeeding a little harder when you wish for a break even just at night.

I was in this situation. The way I broke the cycle was for my husband to put her to bed. We found that falling asleep for the first time without the boob helped her to sleep a bit longer - still woke up in the night but at least got a longer stretch!!

Yes same here! 7.5 months and a total boob monster! I am having to stop work at lunchtime to go and feed him because he simply point blank refuses all bottles, cups, everything!!

Just power through I'm afraid. You fed her an hour before. She's NOT hungry. Cuddle and back in the cot. She'll cry. Give it a few minutes and do it again. Repeat until she sleeps. It's horrible. You'll end up in tears but it's the only way.

Someone else needs to put her to sleep for at least a week if that's possible.

We tried this so many times and eventually, at 18 months, we succeeded. It was a case of persevering with my husband going in to comfort DD every time she woke up. He would sit with her until she stopped crying and laid down again, and for the first week or two would be in her room multiple times a night, for over an hour sometimes. DD would cry for mama and scream and make terrible noises and it was incredibly difficult not to go in and comfort her.

I'd like to say she now sleeps through the night, but she doesn't quite. But she does sleep until 5 without needing intervention from us. She does still wake up sometimes and have a little cry, but will then settle herself again after a minute or two.

Good luck and be strong!

@Wonderland18 I'm glad to hear it's not just me in this position . It makes it feel a little less isolating .
I am just so upset that I ran my second ever bath in 8months and enjoyed it for 10mins only 😩 I hear my in laws talk about their boys and their dummy's and how they looked forward to their evenings post 7pm . Me and my husband have no evenings as I'm up and down the stairs 😭

Ps my biggest worry is that by BF to sleep, I am falling into the strong likihood that I'll be still feeding when she's a toddler , which I don't want to do.

My husband says it's ok as we can reason with her when she's able to understand - please tell me I can reason with her and it will be ok!!!! Lol

Get
The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantly

It’s about stopping feeding to sleep

lol there's no reasoning with a toddler!

I had same issue. I used to get DS out of his cot, cuddle him back to sleep without feeding. It was just a habit it rather than hunger. After a week or so, he stopped waking up altogether.

I wouldn't worry I did this till about 10 months when I stopped bf and moved to formula ready to return to work. I introduced a bottle before bed in the evening and got my partner to settle when needed. It broke the cycle of being cuddled to sleep by only me.

You sound like me 10 months ago!

I have an 18 month old who I fed to sleep (and as time went on I became more worried about feeding to sleep and spent a lot of time googling how to stop!) and I wish I hadn’t worried so much. I was CONVINCED I’d be bf-ing a 10 year old DS loved boob so much.

Anyway gradually it stopped working and we moved into cuddling (and also onto a bottle and cow’s milk). But I wish I hadn’t wasted time being so anxious that I was doing the wrong thing. If your baby needs to be fed to sleep, go with it! It really won’t last forever!

Also DS was not a great sleeper and would be fed back to sleep in the night but once we fully switched to bottles I was able to control how much milk and gradually reduced. We didn’t move onto bottles until 10 months and then it was pretty swift - stopped bf just before a year (now feel nostalgic!). And DS sleeps through now! You’ll get there i

I promise promise it improves. My 19 month old is sound asleep in her bed, where she has been for the last 2.5 hours.
Finally at 13/14 months, something "clicked" and she slept through, not needing the boob at all. And it really wasn't too bad from months 11 onwards - I think my husband doing bedtime made all the difference.

When people say their husbands do bedtime....what do they actually do?

As DD will only BF to sleep (and won't take any other milk)! DH isn't sure how to comfort her/get her to sleep.
Any ideas?

All of my BF babies just stopped falling asleep after a feed, which meant I stopped feeding to sleep.
At around a year old I started doing the last feed of the night downstairs before the bath/bed routine. We then did a bit of ‘pick up put down’ (no choice really as they wouldn’t feed to sleep and wouldn’t cuddle to sleep). Within a couple of days I could just put them in bed and leave the room.

Just keep at it! There's no prize for getting them to stop, they just stop going to sleep whilst feeding eventually.

Go and feed DC

Thank you all SO much for your lovely reassuring words . It's so nice to be able to vent on her and get a wealth of experience back from other mums . I am a first time mum and feel like I'm just winging this mum thing!!

Thank you to the person saying that I sound like them - it's lovely to know I'm not on my own here ! And so reassuring to hear that things changed for you as your baby was ready for it.
Thank you to those reminding me that this won't last forever . It's funny how that is the one thing I battle with the most, I seem to have this warped idea that this is forever , maybe because that's how it sometimes feels - people say that time flies with babies , and maybe looking back on the baby years it does, but when you are in the thick of it , for the very first time, it's so hard to imagine them being any older and any different to how they are !!

I have fed her back to sleep now. (Realised the reason she woke was because she pooped!) xx

@SoyDora thank you for your comment . At what age did you eventually stop breastfeeding your children ?

I am thinking that once my DD stops feeding to sleep , that will be the end to breastfeeding ?! As chances are that will be around 12-18ish months?

Also, for anyone on here still reading - how did you cope with any family opinions on feeding an "older child" and by older I mean , post 6 months ? I do feel like I'm being judged a little bit for still feeding.

Even with a boob obsessed child you will eventually get your evenings back and it is such a lovely feeling! I fed until 17m and he slept through from then, began putting himself to sleep about a month after that. It is such a great feeling just reading a story, giving a cuddle and shutting the door. I could have honestly written your post when my son was 8 months, I was sure weaning was going to be horrific but by the time it came we were both ready and he was ace.

Also your family are being silly, you are not extended breastfeeding regardless of their feelings on that subject. You have an 8 month old! That's still a little baby. Admittedly it is different bf as they don't always drop feeds the way they would drop bottles as solids take over but your baby is very much still a baby.

I shamelessly BF my 2 DC to around 18 months. My DM never really BF and had ideas that it was a bit strange after 6 months - she soon changed her tune. My MIL's mother also make comments such as "you'll be getting her on the bottle now" at 6 weeks.

There seems to be this lingering attitude that babies need to feed them selves, go to sleep themselves and self regulate by 6 months. It's absolutely nuts!!!

I just told myself that my DC had one way of letting me know their needs. They all get to the same place when they're ready.

I'd love to meet these mythical, self-weaned, dry, self-soothing night sleepers. Their mothers must be godly.