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Sleep

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Original poster

This is getting beyond now!

19 replies

kbaby · 24/09/2004 20:38

OK, Im looking for suggestions as to why DD's doing what she is, as DP and me are getting a bit cheesed off now.

Every night for the past 3 weeks DD has been going to bed at about 8ish. She'll sleep for 1 hour and then wake up. As soon as we pick her up she falls straight back to sleep but when we put her down shell last for about 3 minutes before crying again. Shell do this every time we try to lay her in her cot until about 11pm where shell finally stay asleep. Ive tried feeding her when she wakes but she isnt hungry. Its just really annoying us now as we cant do anything in the evenings as we're up and down the stairs all night. At the moment she is sleeping on dp's lap after 4 attempts at putting her in her cot.

Is she doing this because she is used to being rocked/held to sleep? if so why once she is asleep cant we put her down. Will she grow out of it or am I going to have to do cc at 6 months.
Id appreciate advice from anyone whose experienced the same

DD is 17 weeks old

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TracyK · 24/09/2004 20:40

my ds was the same at that age - but in hindsight I think he was hungry.

Original poster

kbaby · 24/09/2004 21:04

I dont think its hunger. Tonight I gave her 5oz of milk from a bottle and then put her on the breast.
The reason I tried the bottle is because she has a habit of falling asleep straight away on the breast before shes had enough milk.

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Lonelymum · 24/09/2004 21:09

You should really try not to rock her to sleep, at least, not every time. My ds1 did this and we spent months rocking him, sitting with him, etc. It became very hard to put him down in the cot without waking him up and having to start again. Ds2, Dd, and Ds3 were all put down in the cot awake. They may cry a bit to begin with but they soon learn and are quite happy to be left to go to sleep alone.

Rowlers · 24/09/2004 21:09

Maybe she's uncomfortable? Trapped wind? Does she bring up burps easily? Have you tried leaving her to cry a little? My DD (now 6m) has a little cry for a minute or two most nights - she gets overtired I think but soon drops off. Sorry, can't be much help!

Original poster

kbaby · 24/09/2004 21:18

Ever since birth she hasnt liked being put down to go to sleep and because she was my first and a newborn i never liked to leave her cry. I now know that this could be part of the problem and will eventually have to leave her cry to figure it out. When I have tried to leave her cry a bit encase she settled herself she never has. She screams for 5-10 mins, chokes and is sick. It breaks my heart and so I couldnt leave her cry anymore and havent done since.

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Rowlers · 24/09/2004 21:28

I was just remembering today how DP and I used to tiptoe around and put her so gently into her crib so that we didn;t wake her up. If she had cried, I couldn't have ignored her either. I don't have any words of wisdom but can only tell yuo that my DD is now much easier, I just put her in her cot when I think she's tired and she goes to sleep on her own. It has just developed. I do think she started to sleep MUCH better around 3 or 4 weeks ago when we moved her to her own room. Try to see it as extra time spent with her, I know it's not easy when you're knackered!

TracyK · 24/09/2004 21:51

is she in her own room in a big cot? that's when my ds settled and slept through at 10 weeks (not now though - but thats another story!)

Original poster

kbaby · 24/09/2004 22:06

Yes I put her in her cot in her room at 10 weeks. I found that I was awake all night as her snuffling and moving about woke me too easily. Now I only hear her if she cries.

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cab · 24/09/2004 22:23

Is she getting a few good naps during the day? Could she be over-tired?

prefernot · 25/09/2004 12:25

I agree with cab that it's worth looking at her daytime naps, overtiredness has always been a problem for our dd when it comes to going to sleep at night. The more she sleeps the more she sleeps. Although for the first time that's slightly changing now she's nearly 2 and I find that if she sleeps more than 2 hours in the day she's not sleepy at bedtime.

I know you've posted about this before kbaby but I wouldn't worry about assisting her to sleep at this age. I know other people disagree but I always b/f dd to sleep until she was about 10 months old at which point she just stopped falling asleep on the breast. I wouldn't dream of doing cc before 6 months (I think they just don't understand why they're being ignored at that age) and personally I wouldn't do it until after 1 when they understand a lot more. With dd we didn't have the problem of night waking you have as once she was asleep she was asleep for most of the night but if she did wake I always just fed her back to sleep and I don't think it caused any problems as from 6 months until just lately she's slept really well and gone to sleep on her own very easily.

In a way I think b/f to sleep is a better option that rocking as with rocking as soon as you put them down the lack of motion wakes them up again. I had a friend who's ds was so used to being rocked to sleep that she bought a rocking crib, tied a belt to her foot and to the crib and every time he woke up, waved her foot about a bit to rock him back to sleep!!! Not the best option, obviously .

woodstock · 25/09/2004 13:22

Will she take a dummy? DS will still wake up occasionally, cry out and root around for his then pop it in and go back to sleep. If she is taking one at that age you tend to have to find it for them IME.

Original poster

kbaby · 26/09/2004 13:30

yes she has a dummy and we put it back in and it looks as if shes going to go back to sleep but then she still wakes up,

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MarmaladeSun · 26/09/2004 17:42

Kbaby... I agree swith prefernot here (going against general opinion I know) but I always bf DD to sleep. Having said that I don't have much trouble once she's gone down for the night until she wakes for a feed around 4 UNLESS she misses her morning sleep. Without that she gets over tired asnd is almost impossible to settle. But I wouldn't worry about feeding/cuddling her to sleep...it doesn't last forever and think of those lovely cosy Autumn nights curled up on the settee together.

Original poster

kbaby · 26/09/2004 21:16

prefernot you may be right with the sleeping during the day thing. Normally dd sleeps for 30 mins in the morning and then cat naps throughout the day, this is because she will sleep in the pram but only if its moving or sleep in the car seat etc but because were out and about shes easily disturbed. But today she has slept 30 mins this morning and then this afternoon she slept on my lap for 2 hrs and because dp was here I didnt need to disturb her to answer phone etc, so far I put her to bed at 8 where she just fell asleep in my arms with no grizzling and no rocking needed, i put her in her in her cot and 1hr 20 mins later shes still asleep. Thats a first so far. The problem is though how can I get her to sleep for 2hrs each day without being held???

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moongirl · 01/10/2004 21:25

a friend lent me the baby whisperer and it looks pretty goodDD2 (8 weeks) was refusing to sleep anywhere but on my chest or in my arms and it was becoming impossible. It has been hard work for the last couple of weeks but i have put her in cot upstairs for daytime naps as well as night and go and cuddle her everytime she cries but put her straight down (awake) each time she settlessometimes after going up and down stairs all evening i think it's never going to work but i feel better that i have a plan that doesn't involve leaving her to cry, and she now seems to bawl on and off only for an hour or so early evening. I was also dead set against swaddlingmy DS1 screamed when i tried it once with him so never again. But i watched DD2 sleeping the other night and she just jerked arms and legs and woke her self up after only 5 minutes of being asleep so i tried swaddling when shes frantic and overtired and biazare but she loved itsighed and fell asleep. Guess it mimicks all that cuddling she'd become so used to.

moongirl · 01/10/2004 21:28

sorry--sounds like i didn't read your post. I know that giving her a cuddle when she cries and going up and down stairs IS what you're doing. But from the book the important thing seems to be the briefness of the cuddle...

prefernot · 01/10/2004 21:53

kbaby, take it one step at a time. If you get her into a pattern of doing a good 2 hour nap at home, even if it's on your knee, it'll start to become a physiological pattern. Taking out in the pram and motion etc. are very addictive for them, we had a similar problem with dd for a while when she was younger and it was exhausting having to be continually on the move to keep her asleep. She did change a lot around 8-9 months though and started settling in the cot really well.

Sandi102 · 02/10/2004 16:08

kbaby, have you started to wean yet? I started at around 17 weeks and i found that disrupted ds's slepp. I think it was his digestive system getting used to this, as ds was very windy esp. at night. I'm sure this will pass. althought ds is still waking at 2, then 4 just for cuddles.

Original poster

kbaby · 03/10/2004 19:24

no we havent started weaning yet. dd is just being bf. she settles herself fine at night e.g if she wakes she either plays for a while and then goes to sleep or i cuddle her and the just put her in the cot awake and she falls asleep, its just a shame she wont during the day or why she wakes after 1 hr

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