In pure hell (sleep)

[letsdothis123]

Help please please. My son (first baby) is 7 1/2 months old. I’m back to work in two weeks and he still wakes all night. He doesn’t wake to feed, he just wakes crying. He’s quite a ‘cry’ey/loud’ baby but still. I don’t know what to do. Some info:

Bedtime has been a good routine since 4 weeks old. Bath, bottle, bed. He’s no problem going down, usually between 8-9pm. We’ve tried later and earlier and nothing makes a difference.

He does sleep a good amount in the day, usually 3 naps for a total of 3-4 hours. I’ve been told this is normal. We don’t force napping, we put him down if he gets really tired (bad tempered inconsolable etc). We try not to let him nap from 4pm ish but other than that we don’t have a daytime routine for sleeping.

A good night is... bed for 8.30, wakes at 2ish and goes down with a dummy well. Wakes again at 4/5 and goes down with a dummy. Up anywhere between 5-7am.

A bad night (last night)... bed for 8.30ish. Woke at 9.30, 10, 11,45, 12.30... etc. Then at 4.30 he won’t even cat nap so we’re up.

The time he wakes varies too. Most commonly between 5-6.30/7 but can be 4am and he has slept till 9 once and 8 a handful of times. When he wakes he’s crying within minutes, almost instantly. He’s not a ‘wake and play’ baby.

We’ve tried ... the bottle rusk, menthol bath stuff, a wrap/swaddle thing, the sleepyhead cushion and he has a dummy. When we try things, we test them for at least 5days but more like a week. I’ve looked at the wonder weeks app and the stages just don’t correlate to him. He’s had full days (trials etc) in nursery and he didn’t sleep at night then either (a lot of people said it would help him sleep)

I really don’t know what to do. We don’t have much, if any, family support. My mother is an alcoholic in and out of mental institutions so I just can’t trust her to help and don’t have much contact. I’d like to hear if people have any ideas, advice or tips. What’s everyone else’s routine? What worked for you? Please don’t bombard me with hate. I know all babies are different and not all go through the night, I just want to make sure I'm doing what we can to ensure he gets there. My mental health is suffering massively and it's about to get a whole lot worse with work etc. I have to go back to work now (financial reasons and 0 hours contact stuff).

Thank you in advance xxxxx

Could it be teething? Try calpol and abersol. I remember at around 7 months my little girl was waking at 3 and would not settle, we gave her a bottle and rocked her, she then sometimes just got in bed with us or if she was settled enough we’d put her back in her cot. I remember thinking this is going to go on forever and I’m creating all these bad habits. It didn’t last long and she stays in her own cot all night now. Anything you can do that helps him and you get back to sleep I’d say do it. It’s a phase and it will pass so try and get through it as painful as possible

My DS is only slightly younger and the last two weeks have gone to pot sleep wise because of teething. I’ve tried everything but very little helps, I just hope it’s a phase and will pass (if it is teething related). I have been co sleeping most nights as he settles much more quickly. Would he settle more in bed with you? It might not be what you want long term but if it helps in the meantime?

I had similar to these bad nights too, my baby also same age. I tried doing 2 naps during the day instead of 3 and sleep got so much better! Don't get me wrong not perfect but wasn't waking up every 2 hours.
I know you said that you were told 3 naps was normal but could it be that he is ready for 2 naps? I usually do 1 nap at 9ish and 1 nap at 1:30ish xx

@letsdothis123 first of all - you are doing an amazing job

Secondly- this does sound a bit like he may need to convert to just two naps - shorter in length.

My DD was exactly like yours at 7 months. She had a nap in the morning around 9.30am and then a quick catnap at 2pm before bedtime at 7/8.

She woke once in the night but would sleep through.

6 month sleep regression can hover at this time.

Learning to crawl or a new skill.

Also teething. Is he biting? Dribbling?

What's his eating like? Do you give a couple of snacks between meals and playtime?

Invest in a Jolly Jumper good to burn off some energy before naps/bedtime

Good luck let us know how you go

Hi. It’s such hard work when it’s like that. Poor you. You’ve probably tried this but my daughter really liked white noise, it used to be an app that I left on all night. Now at 2 she has a fan on all night and listens to the same audio book every day to get her to sleep or if she wakes up in the night. She also liked nursery rhymes when she was younger to go off too or the Harry Potter soundtrack played by the Prague philharmonic orchestra is actually weirdly soothing! Second what other posters have said about naps. I think it’s all about sleep cues so the more tricks up your sleeve to get them to associate with sleep the better. The Jojo sleeping bag is also good. Good luck x

I cant say what worked for us i think it was just time. You don't say you have DP but when you go back to work i would come up with a way you both get sleep.

You go early and he gets up with baby till 12/1 then you get up till morning and alternate. Same for weekends to catch up one gets up and one sleeps. That way you both get at least 1 stretch of 4/hours

We went through similar - at 19 months DS was waking every hour, till.we eventually (on the advice of my DSis, consultant paediatrician) did controlled crying/Ferber method. It worked wonders, within 5 nights he slept through! The change in him was huge, he was no longer massively sleep deprived, nursery commented that he was suddenly so much happier and full of beans.

Controlled crying is safe from 6 months, it sounds like it's the best thing for your family.

Is he in his own room?