Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Flip

Original poster

2 week old won’t be put down and is only comforted by breast

15 replies

Hazzy135 · 25/09/2019 10:15

Hi,
I know I’ve read lots of similar posts of this kind and the majority seem to say it’s normal. I’m hoping to get people who had babies who behaved similar and what worked for them/ when they grew out of it.
Over the past few nights, we have seen an improvement during the nighttime. We’ve started to swaddle him because he flays his arms around a lot so I don’t know if that’s the reason he sleeps a little better at night than in the day? Is it worth trying to swaddle for naps or best leaving for a nighttime cue?
The thing that I’m finding quite difficult at the minute is that I can only seem to comfort him by feeding him. So if he falls asleep while feeding I have the dilemma of trying to put him down but knowing it runs the risk of him waking up quickly and rooting for comfort (he gets very agitated and moves jerkily and kind of turns his head and snorts, desperate to be at the breast!) or just holding him while he sleeps. I can’t rock him to calm him down and while my partner has a little more luck (not smelling of milk) still finds it very difficult and time consuming and by the time he’s settled it’s near to his next feeding time anyway! He’s back at work next week and I’m dreading doing this on my own.
Anyone gone through a similar thing? Is it just a matter of persevering until he needs less comfort? I’m also slightly worried about s future feed sleep association!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Boobiliboobiliboo · 25/09/2019 10:20

It’s way too early to be worrying about habits. Your baby should really still be inside you, so they want to be held constantly and not put down. It’s not just normal, it’s biologically important. Research shows all the cuddling literally grows baby’s brain. Have a read up of the fourth trimester, lower all expectations and enjoy the cuddles. You’ve only just started on the rollercoaster.

As for nighttimes.........

Navy123 · 25/09/2019 10:21

It does get easier.

Google 4th trimester - babies want to be on you all the time to start with!

We swaddled and used white noise for all sleep which seemed to help - I remember the first nap DS had in his Moses basket while I dozed on the sofa, it was amazing!

I know it's a cliche and frustrating to hear but do enjoy it while it lasts - they are tiny for such a short time and you will miss it one day!

WooMaWang · 25/09/2019 10:24

When my younger son wanted to be held all the time, I got one of the stretch wrap style slings and just wore him around the house. It kept him happy and I could move and use my arms.

Original poster

Hazzy135 · 25/09/2019 10:46

Thanks! I kind of did know all that already but I just find myself worrying about everything. It’s good to hear it from people who had babies that were similar and it passed :). My sister’s and my friend’s baby were so content and chilled right from being born but I guess that just got lucky! Xx

OP posts:

maryberryslayers · 25/09/2019 10:48

It's completely normal. A friend told me to enjoy whilst it lasts and they were so right! Get a good box set or loads of snacks and cuddle up, before you know if they will be tearing around far too busy to be held!

sueH1983 · 25/09/2019 10:51

My DS1 was like this. The midwife actually taught me how to safely co-sleep, which is interesting considering it’s not really recommended practice.
I co slept with DS2 right from the get-go and it could be coincidence but he quickly learned to put himself to sleep and would sleep on a washing line, which i’m sure is partly because he felt so secure from the start.
I’m not recommending anything because you should follow safe sleep guidelines, but maybe do some reading and decide what the safest option is for you. I fell asleep sat up holding DS1 and woke up with him slipping from my grasp, so it was safer for us to co-sleep.

I feel for you OP. In hindsight the time is so short but when you’re living it, the sleep deprivation feels awful.x

ISmellBabies · 25/09/2019 14:24

Just hold and boob as much as possible, that's all they want, it's the answer to practically everything for the first year!

MeadowHay · 25/09/2019 19:54

My DD was like this too, if she wasn't on boob she would just scream hysterically. I stopped BF at 10 weeks because it was severely painful for me and then if anything it got even more difficult because she still screamed all the time and now I didn't have boob to calm her. She was a crier unfortunately, gradually growing out of it. A 'high needs' baby and now becoming a 'spirited' toddler at 15mo. But it's just been getting better and better and I love her to bits.

Jent13c · 25/09/2019 20:06

This was my little boy. Some babies just need the comfort of constant suckling and people with babies who don't do not understand. Would he take a dummy at all? I was very reluctant at first (as was he!) but it did give me 5 minutes to get myself sorted or even give daddy some cuddles without him thrashing about like a baby shark! If you are able to just let him go to the breast that would calm him down obviously, tiring for you but he didn't come out knowing his feeding times! It's amazing that they know exactly where to go and what to do when they are hungry. Rest up, get someone else to cook and clean and watch plenty of rubbish tv and let him snuggle in, it's so so tough at the beginning but goes far too quickly.

Also some long term hope, he hated being a baby but is now the easiest toddler and a delight to be around!

InDubiousBattle · 25/09/2019 20:08

Have you tried a dummy?

Danetobe · 25/09/2019 20:21

Anacdota - I have 1 dc who was like this , I co slept initially(so I didn't die of exhaustion) and he slept through the night in by 6 months(!) in his own bed, no sleep training or anything like that I just put him down once to shower and he fell asleep for the night. Another child who was not comforted by the milk only really interested for feeding alone, he still does not sleep through reliably at nearly 5 years old despite every effort on our part and much frustration. Babies go thorough stages, not gradual changes imo and you will find it will get easier but not necessarily a bit each day more like no change for a month or so and then all of a sudden lots will change at once. Try not to worry about daily progress or ups and downs. Get a box set and plenty of food and water and settle down for around 8 to 10 weeks of slobbing around in your pjs. enjoy as much as you can if you can.

Original poster

Hazzy135 · 25/09/2019 20:31

We've tried a dummy! He seems to like it sometimes but struggles to keep it in. Other times he just rejects completely. We'll keep trying.
Thanks for all your stories of your babies who were similar! It just seems like my friends who have had kids haven't seemed to have the same troubles. They've loved cuddles and feeding but haven't had the need to be held all the time. It's just good to hear from people who are out the other side.

OP posts:

Giraffe888 · 27/09/2019 22:20

My DS is 10wks and still wants to be held all the time. He’s growing far too quickly though so I’m making the most of it

VaselineHero · 29/09/2019 12:00

I sat up all night holding my DD for the first 2 weeks! She wouldn't slept except on me so I just accepted it. I ended up buying a sleepyhead which she slept in no problem and still does at 4mo.

HayleyHaystack · 30/09/2019 07:44

I have a 11 week old. We’ve moved away from needing to be on the boob and he is comforted by music, rocking etc. However he is happiest being held. He’s rarely put down! My back will never recover.
One thing I do, and it may work for you or may not, after feeding if he’s asleep I put him over my shoulder upright position for half hour gently tapping his back. He usually stays asleep. He gets the closeness and smells of me still without being on breast and then the transfer to sleepyhead is easier.

Flip