Baby sleeping - but I am not!!!

[AllyPallyChick]

My baby is a week old and over the past three nights has already started to get into a routine, with good stints of sleeps between 2am-5.30am then 6am until 9.30am. He also sleeps for long periods during the day.

Trouble is, (like tonight) I just can't sleep when he does and am in the weird position of sitting here watchig him sleep like a dream whilst I am wide awake. I'm not catching up during the day either. So now I am at the weepy stage and starting to panic as I don't know what to do.

Anyone else experiences this/ offer any comfort? Feel so sad.

I remember getting to a similar stage when ds was newborn. I just couldn't sleep, though my entire being was begging for it. I'm not sure if it's the same with you, but my brain just wouldn't shut down. What I found helped was listening to audiobooks that I'd heard before. I'd make myself lie down and close my eyes and just listen. Eventually I'd doze off. Even if I didn't, I wouldn't have done anything to make myself MORE tired. You might try music as well, if audiobooks aren't your thing.

That's my suggestion, but I want to give you my support as well. The weepy stages pass, but sometimes we get stuck in them and it feels like they'll never end. Just relax. Make youreself a hot drink. Have a cookie. Warm milk? (However cliched).

Good luck. I hope you find the peaceful sleep you crave.

Is Piriton ok while bf? This puts me out like a light.

I have a relaxation CD that I listen to when I am overtired and can't sleep (don't use a tape or the clicking at the end of the tape will wake you up!).

Or, if I am desperate, I have a glass of wine to make me a bit more woozy so my brain switches off.

Plus, try and stop caffeine (even too much chocolate seems to affect my sleep).

Good luck - you will get much better at it when things settle down.

Banoffi

I do understand, I went through this with my first baby and it went on for months - hopefully it wont last that long for you. Is it your first baby? Your baby is very young, in fact you've hardly had time to get over the birth so don't expect too much from yourself. You've just gone through probably the biggest change in your whole life and as well as being a joyful experience it is also a stress - I think it ranks quite high on the stress scale, way above moving house etc. Just try and get as much rest as you can, have a lie down when the baby sleeps and hopefully you'll just crash out one night when you least expect it. I found a glass (or two) of wine did help but don't overdo it especially if you're breastfeeding. Too much alcohol can make you wakeful later on in the night. Lavender oil also helps, sprinkle it on your pillow when you go to bed. Clary sage oil is also supposed to be good but I don't know if it's safe when breastfeeding.
You could go to your GP who might prescribe sleeping pills (I tried Welldorm and temazepam) which might help temporarily, but they won't prescribe them for more than about 10 days because of the danger of dependency. Anyway I found that neither of them worked for me.
Over the counter sleeping pills are available - eg sominex or nytol, but again they are just a temporary solution and you shouldn't use them every night and I don't know if they are safe when breastfeeding.
Hopefully it will get easier once you get used to the baby's sleeping pattern and you will adjust to the new routine.
I too had a relatively easy baby first time and I almost felt "guilty" that I couldn't sleep when the baby slept. I knew people whose babies didn't sleep that well, and I felt that I didn't "deserve" my baby. In fact I wanted her to wake up to give me something to do in the middle of the night! And yet some parents can only dream of a baby that sleeps well. But remember, if your baby was a bad sleeper you wouldn't have a chance of sleeping. But because you have a baby who is a good sleeper you do have a chance, and it will come once you've adjusted to the huge change that has happened in your life. Sorry this has been so long, and all the best!

dear allypallychick, that happened to me sometimes too, there's so much going on in you physically mentally emotionally it's hard to switch off but how about a nice hot bath and 1-2 glasses of red wine, and then just lie down and try your best to sleep ie. don't think about anything except the in and out of your breath, and you can put on a gentle snoring sound, (this is a yogic breathing) and just keep at it, even if you feel alert, you know your body needs sleep and you have to give yourself at least 10 minutes unwinding in bed getting yourself in the right state to let sleep come. this really did work for me, i would climb into bed feeling wide awake and not really keen at all but 20 minutes later i would be deeply asleep. don't rush it or put pressure on yourself. I hope you are not feeling sad, i must say the first few weeks i found really tough, i was an exhausted emotional zombie shuffling round the house with my boobs hanging out. (nipples too sore to let cloth touch them!). anyway good luck and take it easy x

HI- I know exactly how you feel as well- and having chatted to other mums it does seem to be a common problem. I also found a relaxation CD really helps- I had one from my hypnobirthing course. Above all, don't put pressure on yourself to sleep- get as much rest as possible and enjoy quiet time while the baby is sleeping. If your partner is around maybe get him to give you a back rub or simply relax with wine/ hot chocolate/ mumsnet. I think having a baby does confuse your body clock but it will eventually get back on track!

Sorry if that post sounded a bit un-sympathetic- written by one who has had a few good nights sleep now- but I do remember waking my husband in tears at 4 am just so I could tell somebody "I can't go on"!

I had a similar problem here

I had this problem from when my daughter was about 2 months old, and it lasted about 4 months. It started when I couldn't get back to sleep after her night feed, and over the next few nights I got myself into such a state about sleeping. I ended up with total anxiety and would just lie there with my mind racing every night, panicking about the next day and how tired I would be, and if I'd be able to cope. It was awful because my little girl would be lieing there sleeping peacefully, and so would my husband, and I'd just feel like such an idiot for lieing there wide awake.
I tried a whole load of stuff...herbal sleeping pills, relaxation tapes etc, but it is only the last few weeks that I have started to relax a bit in myself and feel better. I'm not sure if it was mild PND (not saying for a moment that thats what you have) or just the anxiety of being a new mum, but I feel like my mind just cleared over time. I think they key thing is to realise that even if you do have a terrible night, you will cope the next day and it isn't the end of the world.
anyway, sorry this is a bit rambly, but i just wanted to let you know that it will pass and you have my total sympathies..

completely normal for several days in first couple of weeks, due to crashing hormones, dont worry, go with it, it does settle - happened with all five of mine - just past it with last one - now 4 weeks