20 months old can't shut brain off

[mtownson]

Getting my 20 month old to sleep is such hard work. It's like she can't shut her brain off. Everything we've done that day comes out as word vomit. Currently I can hear her in bed saying things like 'blast off' 'pick blackberries' 'find crabbies' 'go in the roof' and it just goes on and on like she's a robot stuck on repeat. Does anyone else have this problem? Every time she gets out of bed we put her back into bed and say goodnight and leave the room and she's fine with it but she won't stay in bed. It can take 2/3 hours for her to lie in bed and stop talking/ be calm enough to go to sleep and it's exhausting. Its way worse if we stay in the room and lie with her or interact with her in any way. It's the same in the middle of the night. Any advice appreciated?

No advice but my toddler does this! It doesn’t really bother me as she’s happy and goes to sleep in the end. She’s in a cot though so I can leave her too it. She’s 2 and a half now and still likes a good chat to her teddies before she sleeps!

Is it a problem if she chatters to herself? I don’t see why that needs to be exhausting for you. I quite often hear my two year old chatting/singing after I’ve put him down, I just leave him to it.

How long has she been in a bed - 20 months seems quite young to be a in bed (maybe that’s just me!)?

My son is exactly the same. He’s had a massive language explosion and it’s like he uses bedtime to process it all. He regurgitates his entire day and repeats stuff over and over. I’m hoping it passes!

Not a problem that she chatters to herself- it's more that she keeps getting out of bed. If she stayed in bed that would be fine but it seems like the chattering really keeps her awake, makes her a bit hyper and she can't seem to settle?

Should I just leave her mincing around her room? We did try that but she would still be awake early hours of the morning.

It's not really that bedtimes are particularly stressful in the sense that she crys/ tantrums. She just can't seem to fall asleep and it's exhausting in the sense that you don't really get an evening because she's up and down so much.

She hated her cot. She's been in a bed about 3 months and she loves her 'big girl bed'.

What's your bedtime routine? Would it help if you talked about the day with her before you leave her to sleep?

I think it sounds like she’s a bright little thing - she’s processing it all before bed. Tiring for you but it’s good because she’s learning so much fast.

Ha ha one of mine was like that. She’s 21 now and does the same thing but on WhatsApp!

Do you do a cool down before bed routine? Is the room pitch black?

Put her back in a cot? Or baby gate on her door and leave her too it? My DS1 always talks or sings himself to sleep, it's just his thing. DS2 stays in bed better with an audiobook to listen to, or CBeebies radio plays soothing things at bedtime.

If she’s happily chattering away to herself and toddling round her room for 2/3 hours, maybe she just doesn’t need as much sleep as you think she does? Have you tried just putting her to bed later, or if she sleeps in the day reducing the length?

My 19 month old is the same, but he doesn't have the words. We do have to sit with him whilst he falls asleep because he is just always so wired at bedtime, it's the only way to really calm him down. Same at nap time. Also hated his cot and has been in a bed a few months. I don't really have any advice but what we do is make the room really dark, play calm music and hold his hands (which he insists on when he's not too hyper).. it has improved a bit recently but definitely couldn't pop him into bed and leave or he would be up all night too!

I'd suspect bedtime is too early. None of mine were early sleepers and also all very verbal. Try keeping her up till she's a bit more tired rather than going by the clock?

No idea as mine is only 11 months never shuts up though haha, but could it be that she isn't physically tired enough? Sounds like she gets plenty of mental stimulation, but if she's not tired out that might just wind her up? Similar to adults exercising to relax?

Would it be worth trying a white noise app, we found the noise helps our little one zone out and it helps disguise the noise of our very noisy selfish neighbours

In my experience, being a bit hyper signals overtired. So try later bedtime but if that doesn't work try earlier...

Does your little one still have a nap? My son was like this we’d sit with him for hours until he fell asleep, once he stopped his afternoon nap we brought his bedtime forward which worked.