5 yo DD habitually waking just as i want to go to bed ....help!

[noonar]

for the last week or 2, dd 1 has been waking repeatedly between 10 and midnight. reasons range from being hot and having tummy ache to (current favourite) spiders in her bed and bad dreams.

trouble is, i really want to be there for if she has a bad dream or any other genuine reason for distress, but how do i do this without encouraging her to cry out for me again and again?

in the end i just get cross and tell her she'll have to sleep in the bathroom if she makes any more noise, as she'll wake her sister.

so there you have it. am clearly not handling this recent phase at all well. advice please....

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My DS used to have a recurrent nightmare in which he said "the spiders are laughing at me." He was 5 as well. It didn't happen every night, but was always the same. After reassurance that I wouldn't let the spiders laugh at him, and that I was only in the next room he would go back to sleep. I think he was insecure about no longer being a toddler, having started reception the term before, wanting the greater independence of being a big boy but not quite knowing how to cope.
It must be really hard trying to see to dd1 without waking her sister,don't have a solution to that, but it sounds as though dd1 is afraid that you won't be there for some reason and she's clinging to you with every reason she can think of. I do sympathise, it's really wearing to be called constantly.
Would a magic fairy help do you think, or is she too old? You get a fairy, needn't be expensive, and place it near dd1s bed. You tell her that the fairy will look after her while she sleeps. The power of suggestion works for some but not all. Sorry I can't help you more.

ah, kitten thanks for your suggestion and post.

My DD is a bit older than yours (7) but has been doing similar things - a touch of insomnia and was coming in at ungodly hours waking us up to tell us that she couldn't get back to sleep (grr). So, when there was clearly nothing actually wrong, we've instigated a 'staying in bed' star chart - we're happy for her to come in to us if she's really ill (bleeding, bumped herself); if she's feeling sick I don't want her standing over me and she's old enough to just go straight to the bathroom (I'm a light sleeper, and I'll hear her and go to her), so apart from those exceptions, if she doesn't disturb us once we've gone to bed, she gets a star, and five stars mean a treat of some sort. Might work for yours, but it does rely on your being very confident that she's not actually ill.

thanks, jackie. i think a similar chart could help us .