Please read.. self settling?!

[HakunaMatataa]

My 6mo DS will just not sleep for longer than 2 hours at a time at night. I feel it's my fault as hes breastfed and is always fed to sleep. Some nights he will literally wake every 20 minutes until he is fed back to sleep and most nights I put him in my bed, this doesn't help either. I don't really want to do CC. I'm just interested to know if anyone else has had this and how they taught their baby to self settle. He is weaning and so I don't think he needs the milk at night. He will not take a dummy either. White noise doesn't seem to work. He doesn't nap much during the day (unless in the car). He seems so tired all the time but just will not sleep. I would really appreciate any help, suggestions or advice

Bumping in the hope of some replies

Hi,
I sleep trained my DD at about 8 months. She was a terrible sleeper - woke every 90 mins, BF to sleep after every waking, would only nap on me in the day after I rocked her for ages.

I started with evenings and one night fed her in her room but with a lamp on so she didn't fall asleep, then put her into her cot awake and turned the lamp off. She also has white noise. She started crying and I let her cry for 30 seconds before going in and calming her down without picking her up (so 'shh'ing her and stroking her back). Then I left again and let her cry for 40 seconds before going back in and calming her down. I kept building the time I left her until about 3.5 minutes. At 3.5 minutes wait time I was just about to give up when she fell asleep.
It was horrible, obviously, but the process in total took about 25 minutes. The following night I put her down as before and she cried for maybe 2 minutes before settling herself and going to sleep!

Since then she is able to self settle when she wakes in the night and isn't hungry. She is only 10 months now and wakes about twice in the night for a feed, but most other times she is able to settle herself back to sleep. If she doesn't settle I know something's wrong (like now, her front tooth is coming through). I can also put her down for a nap without me having to rock her.
The sad part is now she will never settle on me or co-sleep as she did before, but at least I get a better night's sleep.

I would first aim to stop feeding to sleep, sleepy but not asleep.

I did pick up put down with mine, no crying involved. First sign of being upset/unhappy they got picked up and cuddled. Hard work the first three days but after that it was done.

I saw it as "teaching" my DC that they were ok to be awake and in their cot but if they needed me I would be there for them.

In my experience this isn't unusual at all. It is also entirely normal to still be feeding at night at this age i haven't got good advice apart from putting the baby down sleepy and encouraging them that way.

Thank you @SlimGin @RandomMess @yikesanotherbooboo all really great advice and I've taken it all on board.

Today I put his next-to-me away, rearranged our room and got the cot ready for him. I fed him with the lamp on until he was nearly asleep, winded him, laid him down in his cot and turned off the lamp. For the first time EVER he settled himself to sleep with no crying

Maybe a fluke but I'm so pleased.

Thank you all for the advice x

So glad to hear DS settled himself tonight @HakunaMatataa ! Hopefully it's not a fluke but at least now you know he can do it