Title says it all really.
Basically, DS has had a lot of health issues in his little life bless him, CMP intollerance, reflux, contstantly sick still despite being on dairy free milk etc, heart murur.
At the start, he was a great sleeper but i felt extreamly distant from him. We had set a routine which meant he slept in his mosses basket well on his own, fine. But, i felt a lot like i was just filling in until his 'real' mum turned up. So, paired that with refulx issues which wernt being fixed, we allowed him to sleep in our arms/on chest etc. It worked a treat, we were best buds. However, he obviously grew and now we are in a huge pickle.
About a month to 6 weeks ago, i decided enough was enough and took one hellish day of rocking, put down, pick up again, rock etc but he got the idea that sleep happens in a cot. He was doing this with encouragement to sleep i.e rocking no problem. Until he went to nursery 2 weeks ago and they refuse to rock him. So, he will only sleep there for 45 mins when he is burnt out. Sleeps in the car on the way there and back (half an hour each way), not 100% sure how those night are at the moment as each night has been different sometimes bed as soon as he gets home, sometimes hes not tired until an hour past his usual bedtime. I can deal with that.
The biggest issue is his home naps. He would allow nursery and DH to pat him to sleep. He will not allow me to do it and has since stopped letting dh do it to. We are the just in the room and its a masaive distraction for him. So i leave the room and he screams and screams. Just to confirm, his night time sleep is beyond fine. Hes a hungry baby and will wake at 4ish for a feed after being dream fed at 10 but we are getting there.
But with his naps, he now stands up in his cot and everything is so much more entertaining than sleep.
We have tried everything. We have a black out blind but out windows are slanted into the roof so a lot of light stilk comes in. He has a fan on thanks to the temp and a lullaby quietly playing (thanks nursery for that idea).
The idea of getting him down for a nap makes me so anxious, i hate it. And its effecting my relationship with him. Im so fed up of him crying and winging at nap time that when hes awake i dont want ti spend time with him. Im at breaking point and i dont know what to do.
While writting this, he has gone from standing to sleeping in 20 minutes which is bloody unheard of. Is this the start of a good strech? Should i just put him in his cot and leave him? When i normally do this, he crys and crys for like an hour until i cant take any more and by then my fuse is burnt out. I really dont know what to do