Nap times and bed time are a massive battle

[Sunflower160]

DS is 15 weeks old. He is a happy delight, when he isn’t tired. From around 11-13 weeks I found that we had got things a bit more sussed, I was able to spot when he was getting tired (yawning, nuzzling into his hands etc) so that I could get him down for a nap before he got cranky. It’s all now changed and he seems to go from absolutely fine straight to being overtired and inconsolable. He then whines for ages and I can’t put him down and I end up having to rock and sway him to sleep, which I am worried is going to make a rod for my own back. I feel like I am spending hours of my day trying to get him to nap. If I just put him down and left him to settle he would scream, whereas two or three weeks ago he would self settle a lot of the time which was brilliant. He also used to feed to sleep, but doesn’t seem to do this anymore either and if he does he wakes as soon as being moved away from the breast. Evening time is even worse, he sleeps generally well with 1-2 breastfeeds in the night but it takes ages of standing rocking him, feeding him, shhing and patting before he finally sleeps for the night. Last night I was doing this for 3 hours until 10pm when he was finally asleep. I have tried an earlier bedtime and starting his bedtime routine at half 6 (bath, story, feed), but if he does go to sleep it only ends up being a nap and he’s awake and cranky again. It’s impossible to get him to proper sleep before 9pm and I really wish i could bring it forward. He wakes for the day at 8am. He is usually awake for between 60-90 mins before having his first nap which is usually around 45 mins. He then has another nap around lunch time, again around 45 mins. As for the afternoons, he doesn’t seem to have a pattern with his naps. He either has two short ones, or one around 2 hours long, at different times each day. If I tried to get him to nap at the same time each day, 2:30pm for example, he simply wouldn’t sleep. Is this just a phase that will pass or am I doing something wrong? It’s a battle trying to get him to be calm enough to doze off and it’s wearing me down a bit.

Have you read the wonder weeks? (There's an app that summarises the book). It talks about babies developmental leaps - yours is just beginning leap 4 and you're close to the 4 month sleep regression which probably explains the changes in routine.

@burblife thank you, I’ve just been reading about the 4 month sleep regression and it sounds like it could be the start of that. I assumed that it only affected nighttime sleep but obviously not!

You're welcome!
I found it helped with Dd to know that it was just a phase. Personally, I wouldn't stress too much about routine of naps etc, they settle down eventually. I found she just adapted to whatever we did that day, sleeping in the car on the way home from somewhere or sleeping in the pram/sling on a walk. Friends who had strict routines found they were tied to the house at certain times.

It was around 3/4 months that I introduced a dummy at nap/bedtimes. Would that be a possibility?

@burblife he had a dummy at bed time but unfortunately he now keeps spitting it out :( thank you though, it’s reassuring to know that it will hopefully pass