5.and 1/2 months old and will ONLY b/feed to sleep - HELP!

[maltatheterrible]

DD has always been breasfeed to sleep, i didn't know this was "wrong" and now seem to be stuck with it. She used to go down for naps without feeding but now she won't do that either.
Occasonally she goes to bed easily but usually it's at least 35 minutes of her just holding the nipple in her mouth after a couple of sucks, but screaming blue murder if i try and put her down.
i really don't want to use a dummy - also she is waking up 2/3 times a night and needs feeding back to sleep then as well.

any ideas gratefully appreciated please....

malta - don't despair! Although dummies are great in my opinion - if you use it just to settle her then hopefully she will drop it out of her mouth when she is settled. If you use it just for night times/naps and then slowly weaned her off, ie - not letting her suck it whilst she's actually asleep, just use it the way you use your breast??

Good luck though!

You know, it does get better - dd did this, she's now 9 months, still bfs before bed but will then lie down and go to sleep with little intervention.

I got the no cry sleep guide which helped and she had a dummy between four and five months. She then abandoned it herself - and she only had it at night so we didn't really care.

You can try gently removing her with your finger, if she reattaches let her suck, then a few minutes later, repeat. Eventually she'll be too sleepy to object but will learn she doesn't need that trigger.

thanks for the response gogetter, I was put off dummies by tales of babies crying as soon as the dummy falls out, didn't think to try and gently remove it when she's actually a sleep

have a feeling she will just wake up and scream if i try this though

maltathe terrible: IMO it is not "wrong" - your DD is your baby and she's still tiny. I bf my LO to sleep for just over a year and now LO goes to sleep with a beaker of cows milk, in the BF position!

IMO it is only a problem to BF to sleep if it you are unhappy with it/it is causing you an actual problem. Otherwise, I would say it is totally natural behaviour.

i have been trying the break the latch technique, but she just roots frantically and sucks about 5 times before going still again, I am repeating this for about 35 - 40 minutes before she finally gets so tired that she just crashes out in my arms - it's good to know that there might be an end to it though

i guess I won't be dping this when sh's 15 but at the moment I;m not so sure

Its all trial and error I guess although if she does scream try to settle her again with the dummy rather than picking her up out of the cot, because she is probably already half asleep and this will disturb her. The first few days will probably be difficult but be patient and she will eventually learn to go to sleep in the cot rather than on your breast - you just have to teach her new associations with sleeping!!

Crokky - actually it's not great from a dental PoV long term but short term it won't do any harm.

It took two weeks to get dd to come off before sleep - keep at it, you'll get there

I agree with Crokky - it is not wrong to bf to sleep (my ds is still doing it at 2.3)

I don't think there is anything wrong with gently trying other methods of settling her to sleep, but I wouldn't persist if it's clearly not working. Your dd is still young and may not be ready to fall asleep alone just yet. HTH

thanks all, tonight she went down in about 3 minutes, albeit whilst feeding so I felt really mean about complaining

also she is cutting her first two teeth so I shall be more patient and wait awhile before worrying about it

She's still only tiny. If you like it and she likes it, then keep doing it. My mother's favourite phrase comes to mind. "Who makes these rules?"!

I would recommend gradual retreat/withdrawal. It helped my DD realise she didn't need the nipple to sleep any more. She woke through the night from 17 weeks until 7.5 months . However, on the 4th July at nearly 8 months she slept 11 hours and has continued to do so. Think its a bit GR/GW and a bit she was ready for it. She has never had a bottle of even EBM. She has never had a dummy - a remember babysittin my nephew at around 2 years old and having to go in constantly to put dummy back in. She doesn't even suck her thumb. I do have a Taggie blanket. I would also recommend NCSS.

I think its a perfectly natural thing to do to feed your baby to sleep. She now feeds, stops and I put her in cot rolls to her side and snores.

Keep going, she will sleep through eventually.

Remember 4th July as it was my birthday - what a lovely present!

Malt, my ds2 bf to sleep for 7 months and fed constantly through the night. He is now 10mos and sleeps 12 hours...we started putting him to bed awake and going in every 5 mins...I suppose it was cc but I did pick him up quite a lot...the first night he was asleep within 20 mins and I couldn't believe it. AT the same time as this we did cranial osteopathy which was frankly brilliant. Have you thought about that?

maltatheterrible - I do not agree that it is wrong to breastfeed a baby to slepp. I have had 4 children and I loved the last feed of the day when they breastfed to sleep.

I never 'trained' them to go to bed awake and i didn't have sleep problems with any of them.

Please do not break off the suction to end the feed - you will cause more problems by limiting the amount of milk your baby is getting. You will also find it will take longer for her to settle.

Just let her feed to sleep if she wants - she is still very young as other posters have said.

mears hello (genuflecting to mumsnet topdog )
i don't think i'm limiting the ammount of milk she gets as she isn't sucking, just holding my nipple in her mouth, but it's great to hear from so many people that feeding her to sleep is not "wrong" and that others have done it and not suffered any long term sleep problems

thanks all for responses, I shall chill out about it as I do actually enjoy the last feed, just got steamrollered by others opinions

"Who makes these rules?"

I'll remember that next time I come across another 'rule.'

I was over the moon when I discovered breastfeeding sends babies to sleep. What an amazing invention. I do it for every nap and every evening, although when DD half-wakes in the night she gets back to sleep fine on her own (she's 4 months, so fingers crossed it stays that way).

Yes it's great that bf sends babies to sleep but the problem is when they wake up every 1-2 hours and can't get back to sleep without the boob..this happened to me for 7 months and I was exhausted. He would also only sleep in my arms and much as I loved this, there came a point where I had to find other ways of helping him get to sleep.
Maltatheterrible, I also found that expressing some breast milk on to a breast pad really soothed him too.