7 month old cries herself to sleep

[parentingsince2018]

Hi there, im a first time mum and my dd is almost 7 months old. We started a routine with her young and she was amazing at going to bed, she would have a bath, bottle little story whilst having her bottle then into her bed awake and would fall asleep happily just chatting to herself and nod off! She has slept through from about 7 weeks (10 hours no feeds) however..... for the last I'd say at least 7 weeks now she screams going to bed! She still does same routine, but now as soon as you step in her room she starts to wimpier and once she is layed in her cot she goes crazy screaming for between 5-10 mins then flat out asleep all night! I've read some babies need to cry before they go to sleep but it makes me so sad and deflated thinking she's going to bed sad!! Anyone have any advice or is it something I need to just get used to? Thanks x

It’s very normal at her age to suddenly have this issue. If you’re ok with ten minutes crying, I would ride it out and it will pass. She won’t suffer any long term effects and letting her learn to self soothe is important imo! Well done! It’s awful but won’t last!

I wouldn't leave a baby to cry like that. Other people will think it's perfectly fine. My advice would be to comfort your child. Not sure that's the sort of advice you're after though.

@icannotremember any advice is welcomed and appreciated, I try to comfort her and it seems to make it worse/last longer, like she wants to be left alone? It makes me sad to hear her cry but I feel like I've tried it all and nothing works :-(

@trashcanjunkie thank you 💗 it's so hard to hear her cry it breaks my heart but she does go off! I thought it might just be a phase but I must admit I thought it would of passed by now x

If she has that association with her room/cot maybe try having fun in her room during the day, playing with toys and singing songs etc. Try it in the cot as well so that she doesn't associate it just with sleeping and being left alone. May not work but worth a try!

My 6 month old ( albeit still does not sleep through) has started to on occasion do the same.

I can distract him from it ( I do hand puppets he and clench fist and I clench fast and do high fives with him he just loves hands and how they work ) until he calms and is more relaxed ... half the time I can then leave the room ... do odd jobs and pop my head back In / rub his tummy quickly or pop dummy in and he is asleep shortly after

Sometimes I have to stay because he is just that sad and worked up he won’t stop after 10 mins though I got to 30 mins and I crack ... it make some sad too ... but maybe try the above tactics.

But lovely that she does go 10 hours after 😊 good girl!

I still bet min 4 wakings up, one night feed and occasionally the need for water in the night .. followed by the lets play at 4 am giggles 😂😂

My daughter used to do this, if you tried to comfort her it made it worse and she would thrash and cry harder. I eventually worked out she wanted to be on her own and it was her way of settling herself. She did it virtually from birth, would cry and cry if you cuddled her/rocked her but if you put her in her crib she’d cry for five minutes and then be sound asleep. I got very good at recognising when she was tired and needed her own space, she would only fall asleep in my arms if she was ill.

@SlimGin that's a really good idea thank you, we never spend time in her room really she wakes up we go in my room then get ready for the day go down stairs and that's it till bedtime!! I will try and spend more time in there x

Some babies cry as a form of self soothing. If it's more whinging and protesting rather than being genuinely upset, in which case the crying would escalate.
She might also be over tired, you could maybe try putting her to bed slightly earlier and see if she is any calmer.

It is really normal for this to start at this age. Crying actually releases stress hormones in the tears so it's a natural way of babies releasing tension and processing their day.

Don't leave her alone but don't try and stop it either. Just sit with her while she cries letting her know you love her and are there. Like most baby things, it is a phase and will end as she learns to regulate her emotions better herself.

Babies can't be taught to 'self soothe' it's a developmental milestone so they either can do it or not. This is part of the process so just help her through this stage as best you can.

Mine did this. Now self settle well.
My mum said I did too. She used to leave the house with the dog as couldn't bare to listen! Funny enough I have no recollection. My dad was home obviously.