To feel guilty about the nights

[bananasinnighties]

We have an 11 day old beautiful DD. Pregnancy was very h

Posted too soon

Anyway...

Hard pregnancy, I was very ill. I am suffering with anxiety at the moment, but overall feel okay.

DP has been doing most of the nights with the baby, I feel really guilty. He insists. When I do the nights I am up with every cry, whimper and don't sleep well myself. She only wakes up once or twice for a feed, but I am always up more if she is stirring etc.

When DP does it he sleeps downstairs and literally is up once or twice.

Has anyone else had similar?

DP is working but it's appointment based and isn't always working all day.

Don’t feel guilt!! You’ve just spent 9 months growing and birthing a human being, and your dp sounds like he gets this and understands.

You can’t be the best parent having absolutely no sleep, so you should be taking it in turns to see to baby overnight. There will be a lot of women who desperately needed that kind of support and never got it (myself included).

Enjoy your tiny newborn and the rest! Congratulations.

Don't forget your little bundle of joy is his too. Dads should share the burden of night feeds and changes so don't feel guilty. When my DC were babies my DH would take the weekend feeds and as I was a SAHM I did week nights which worked very well for us. When you are feeling more able you can take over some of the feeds yourself. Congratulations on your new addition to the family, health and happiness to you all.

Honestly sleep deprivation is cumulative. Take it while you can. Make sure he knows he can say if it gets too much! There may come a period baby wont settle for him so honestly take the respite while you can.

And congratulations!

I don’t really understand the question? Do
You feel anxious that you are putting too much pressure on him to do nights or feel guilt you aren’t doing them?
A couple of wakes a night is brilliant for an 11 day old- keep doing what you’re doing as long as all three of you are happy!

My dh did all the night feeds for first 3 weeks of ds2 life. I had post partum haemorrhage so was exhausted yet I felt awfully guilty too. Guilty on dh , guilty on baby worrying we wouldn’t bond. Once he went back to work he continued to do one weekend night feed and I looked forward to this so much . 3 years down the line I am so glad he did this. Don’t feel guilty I’m sure everyone is happier when people are getting sleep and I’m sure that’s what your dh wants.