Does sleep really begat sleep in babies?

[Reastie]

Am due dc2 next month.

Dd1 sleep was a nightmare, we got in all sorts of terrible patterns eg until she dropped her last daytime nap I’d have to walk her in her buggy to sleep. Every single day. Often it would take over an hour of walking before she’d finally give into sleep. She also never slept the long hours at night the internet told me she needed. She seemed tired but couldn’t switch off and get to sleep. She’s now 8 and it’s only in the last couple of years things have got settled and easier.

I’ve been reading sleep books in prep for next baby. I need to get things better this time for my sanity! The books seem to speak of sleep begatting sleep. Was that the case for you? I’m now wondering if dd didn’t sleep enough and that was the issue. We would wake her up from naps so she was tired in the evening but then she would never go to sleep in evenings. I’m wondering if our steps to try to make things better, like make her bedtime later because she wouldn’t go to sleep fir hours every evening were the wrong way round and we should have been making bedtime earlier and naps longer. But when we did longer naps she then was even worse at night so I’m clueless really. Dh never believed the sleep begats sleep thing...

Ah yes the 'sleep is really important to me'.

I dont mind surfing on 3 hours sleep a night. I like feelint.like a zombie.

As has been said, this is very difficult for mothers of non sleeping babies to hear because it implies a choice.

Hmm I put my three kids in a good sleep routine from very early. I kept them to a schedule and fed to a schedule.
Dc1 slept through from 9 weeks 7-7 with a dream feed at 10.30.
Dc2 slept through from 5 months with a dream feed at 10.30.
Dc3 slept through from 6 weeks 7-7 with a dream feed at 10.30

Obviously this was due to the "schedule" and my fantastic parenting skills I thought.

Then came dc4 and I realised what a fucking arse I was.

4 years of broken sleep... schedule? He fucking laughed in the face of schedule.

I now hold my hands up and admit I was an idiot. The book got launched and I realised that they are all different. Sometimes they just don't sleep all night. Eventually it will happen but in all honesty I think there is naff all you can do, except remember that one day the hell will end.

Wow troppi. Just goes to show you can do what you like... and so will they!!

Tbh troppi 3 out of 4 sleeping through the night from then is pretty impressive though

I think you've had the bad sleeper first and you'll get a good sleeper next, it would be sheer bad luck to get two bad sleepers....

My first was a nightmare he was awful at naps and bedtime, dropped naps at 15 months unless he fell asleep on a long car journey and then he'd be up really late and still have a crap night and be up early! Mil used to say "sleep begets sleep" well it didn't for him! He slept through only a handful of fluke times before he was 2.5! He's now 10 and still a bad sleeper - takes ages to wind down and switch his brain off, wakes in night and usually up before 6!

My second was a good sleeper, decent naps etc, he's now 8 and still a good sleeper but also an early riser.

My third is 18 months and she is the best sleeper of them all! She's slept through 8-7 since 8/9 weeks (odd exception of teeth/illness) and she naps really well too in her cot or on the go, she's not fussy, perhaps it's because she's had to be flexible being the third child.

Perhaps it's luck but I haven't done anything any different with any of them!! I don't think there's much you can do some babies are good sleepers, some are not but hopefully you've done your time with bad sleep, friends have had it the other way around, lulled into false sense of security with a good sleeper first so thinking their wonderful routine is why and then getting a terrible sleeper next time around!