Bed with bed safety rail for 5.5 month old?

[MummEE2]

I've been co sleeping with my now 5.5 month old DS since he was about 1.5 or 2 months old. Can't remember exactly! As he started to refuse sleeping in his Moses basket or cotbed. Tried everything-spray breast milk, put my t shirt down, white noise, swaddle, sleeping bag. You name it. Anyway in my bed he's been sleeping ok but I think it's time to get him in the cotbed! He has started rolling also and although I'm a very light sleeper him being in my bed still worries me.

I'm BF and gave also started weaning him at a nurses advice. And it's going ok so far. I BF him to sleep every time.

I know he won't sleep in his bed and the transfer is when he wakes up. So I'm thinking of changing his cotbed into a bed and putting a safety side up. That way I could lie next to him to feed him to sleep in his bed and then sneak out and not have to transfer him. I am holding some hope that it might actually work as me and my DH have been sleeping separately due to our baby being in our bed as he's a heavy sleeper. And it's not doing anything good to our relationship really..

I'm thinking doing it this way surely is better than continuing to co sleep?? Any thoughts/advice please??

Thank you, I've made my mind up and will not be transferring the cot into bed with the rail on. It's just too risky. So that's that idea gone out of the window.

I had the cot next to me but I literally have to feed my DS to sleep. If he wakes putting my hand on him stroking etc doesn't work. He just wants boob and then he's asleep again. I know this probably shouldn't be happening as it a bad habit but it's what my DS is used to..he just uses me as a human dummy. And he refuses any actual dummies-tried that too 😫

Cot right up to my bed with 3 sides on sounds like something worth trying if the bed hights can be matched and no gaps. He can already roll though. Still surely if no gaps etc this would be safer than just continuing to co sleep?

Yes, you need to do it in baby steps and he will get there. Ignore advise for cry it out!! And feeding to sleep isn't a bad habit either, if it works and you're both happy, crack on.

Sorry I will not let him cry it out. That's just not for me. He's way too young and I'd rather be up all night than let him cry.

My son was very similar we had his cot like this.
So we had more room.
www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.supwithu.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2018%2F08%2Fcrib-attached-to-bed-31-brilliant-ikea-hacks-every-parent-should-know-b-a-b-e-r-s-unique-baby-cots.jpg&imgrefurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.supwithu.com%2Fcrib-attached-to-bed%2Fcrib-attached-to-bed-31-brilliant-ikea-hacks-every-parent-should-know-b-a-b-e-r-s-unique-baby-cots%2F&tbnid=UVlQh6W2odkEsM&vet=1&docid=RkgclESYMgUtQM&w=640&h=427&hl=en-GB&source=sh%2Fx%2Fim

Mommaof2x thank you for reassurance 🌺 I know it'll sort itself out eventually but it's hard at the min as I feel it's not right we're still cosleeping. I guess I'll keep trying

You could try mattress on floor (use the mattress from his cot bed, or larger mattress that allows you to lay down next to him)

My DS2 absolutely hated his cot. He slept on a mattress from about 4mo. He was a bad sleeper, but was better in a bed than attempting the cot.

Umberellaonesie the link doesn't seem to be working for me? It just brings up google?

MOreGinPlease he's a big baby. Long and chubby. Healthy. Cot beds are big but he didn't like his Moses basket either. Just another thing we wasted money on in the hope he'll sleep better

Well done for not leaving him to cry.
I’d try a mattress on the floor or just co-sleep for longer u til he’s doing longer stretches and then try transferring him again. It’s a pain but he'll get There

We had the same problem and bought one of these

www.amazon.co.uk/Arsmreach-Universal-Sleeper-Sleep-Natural/dp/B00003TKVZ/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_75_t_0?psc=1&_encoding=UTF8&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&refRID=2G5897KHTH4TJ9ZZC2VN

They are very large so will take them up until around 2 (or when they start climbing out). The mattress has different heights and there is a clever system of attaching them to your bed so that the baby can't get stuck. Once they get used to sleeping in the co-sleeper you can pull the fourth side up to make it a cot (or even a playpen).

A bed with guard could be very dangerous....

Hopefully this will work.
We just used his cot bed with side off.
amandamedlin.com/2013/11/diy-co-sleeper-pretty-little-quilt/

Mine were like this, I’m really sorry but the only fix was perseverance. Boob to sleep obviously isn’t great for either if you, and giving in has taught him that if he tries hard enough he is back right where he wants to be, with you

Once you need your DH back, to be honest mine was in the spare room longer than 5 months
Then for a week (ish) I often fell asleep (passed out) next to the cot bed with my hands through the bars shushing. I stopped co sleeping first, still gave boob on demand and attempted a transfer but if it failed back out for more boob, try again. Eventually once I was sure they were not hungry (or I was just too tired) I just shushed. Had pillow and duvet on the floor next to the cot, and still in same room. Moved out to own room at just over a year.

One if the best gifts you can give a child is good sleep, but it will take really crap week (ish) to introduce the new routine.

Good luck

Yes with the cot right up to my bed, we did have to adjust it slightly and make a new "height" where there was none previously, and strengthened it underneath.We then pushed her mattress over to meet mine and used a rolled up towel at the far side to keep the mattress at my side with no gaps. I wasn't worried about her rolling into the rolled towel as it was so far away and all she wanted to do was snuggle into me anyway! We coslept like that happily for many months and I'm actually now at the stage of having to consider doing it again, as her cot is right up next to my bed still but with all 4 sides up since she was rolling/crawling. However, she can now escape out by putting her feet onto my mattress and boost up and over🙈😂
So I need it to be safe again😩

Please consider a swimming noodle, you pop it under the bottom sheet near the edge and it stops them from rolling

Cot next to my bed with side down might work. I'll have to check heights and see if I can attach it safely. Fingers crossed. Thank you, I have hope. If it's not compatible i'll just have to cosleep for longer. Poor DH and our relationship. Never mind

Adagio a whole week or possibly longer sounds so bloody difficult 😣 the two nights I tried were a nightmare. Dreading it if I have to do it. BF definitely isn't helping but completely stuck as DS won't take a bottle

We used the cot right up against our bed with just 3 sides on. At that age I put a tightly rolled up towel underneath the sheet in a U shape - it meant they felt secure, weren't likely to accidentally roll themselves over & wake up & the sheet was sufficiently tight that there were no gaps for them to get stuck in. Seemed to work for my DC!

FFS. When I said cry it out I didn't mean abandon him in a room!

I meant feed him then put him in the cot and hold hands/sing/read/stroke face and just persevere. It's rubbish and he will cry and want back in your bed but if you want to bring co-sleeping to an end then there isn't another option. You just need to get through it.

And since you were planning on putting your 5 months old into a single bed with a rail (which is a death trap) then I think teaching him to settle in the cot on his own is a better idea than that idiotic one.

TheInvestigator I was trying to think outside the box for my LO and that's why thought of the rail idea! Don't take it personally that I'm not doing CIO. I'm doing my best with advice to teach him to settle. Some people have told me their kids never had a problem with sleeping in their own beds. I tell them to come try themselves with my DS and I'd pay them if they succeed as he's got his own personality! Like I said my DD slept in her own Moses basket and cot from day 1 and I could soothe her easily. My DS is a whole different ball game

Both my kids slept in my arms. It was the only way they would settle. At the 4/5 month point I started putting them in their moses basket after they'd fed to sleep. Once they stopped waking up every time I put them down and had settled into it, I started putting them down before they fell asleep and read stories and held their hand.
They screamed. They cried. They gurned. But we got through it. A horrible couple of weeks, but they learned to settle on their own. And they've turned out quite well so far so it didn't do them any damage.

Sorry for my late reply. A floor bed is a mattress on the floor. If you look up “Montessori floor bed” you will get lots of ideas. It’s a very good way to transition your little one into their own bed... you can feed them to sleep lying down and then ninja roll away when they are fast asleep. Then you can have some time to yourself/ with your husband in the evening and go back to your baby whenever they need you.
Breastfeeding to sleep is the biologically normal way to get your baby to sleep so don’t listen to anyone who says it’s a bad habit or any other such nonsense.
Good on you for refusing to leave your baby to cry, I feel exactly the same way!
I found night walked incredibly difficult until around 12 months when I did two things: I accepted that this in normal and my little one will only ever need me this intensely for a relatively short time, I also stopped looking at the time when he woke and mostly learnt to stop even counting the night wake ups. It took a few weeks but made it so much easier to deal with broken sleep.
All the very best!

I sidecar-ed dd3s cot to ours too, worked wonders.
Had to make a new height on it, and I couldn't attach it to our bed, so I put breeze blocks against the furthest away cot legs to stop it moving.
It didn't move an inch for the 18 months it was there. Just watch your toes if you do that, breeze blocks hurt when you kick them

I've been through this and feeding to sleep is fine if it works for you. But if it's not any more then your DH will need to try to help out to try to break the dependency - if that's what you really want to do. If I were you I would feed your DS as much as he needs then pass to DH to try to settle him in cot and leave the room. Repeat for all wakeups.

If DH can take a few days off - Thu and Fri or Mon and Tues to get a run at it that would help as otherwise he'd be dead on his feet at work.

My DW and I have done this and are much more of a team with DD's sleep than we before where tbh I didn't do much.

Hope that helps!