Routine at 5 weeks

[Dolphin27]

Son was born a month early, his due date was 2 days ago. He only likes to sleep on someone and cries when put in his crib.

Some days are good and he will sleep a decent amount and have nice awake time. Other days he can be awake a lot and unsettled, he has no set nap or feeding times, it's all completely led by him.

Should I be having some kind of routine? Some people are telling me I should be I don't see how I can so young? He's only just 7ibs 13oz at a month old and still so dependant?

Any advice or comments appreciated

I don't know what others do, but I think it's pointless to impose a routine on a small baby. Just enjoy them, do what works for you and they will settle into a rhythm as they get bigger x

I'm sorry to break it to you OP but a routine for a 5 week old, especially a premature one, is bonkers. I suggest you read about the 4th trimester and tell people to mind their own business!

Thanks, I'm Pleased you said that. I've got to stop letting people get to me. I'm enjoying the kangoo care even though its exhausting but it's met with so much judgement I feel like I'm doing something wrong!! I wouldn't know where to start with a routine as it feel wrong at this stage and feel it would just upset him trying to force one on him!

People have all sorts of ridiculous ideas! Smile and ignore OP.

I was only saying to DH the other day that we didn't worry about a routine when our then 3 month old wanted to be in the living room with us at half 9, and yet at 9 km ths hes found his own routine and wants to get to bed at 7. Imagine all the extra stress wed have piled on for him to get there himself anyway.

Babies don't need routines at that age, they need snuggles.

I wouldn't impose a schedule on a newborn baby, you should follow their cues.
BUT having a routine, as in, a series of things you always do, can help young babies learn to associate things with sleep.

Eg I have the following routine for night time before bub's big sleep (been doing this since 2 weeks)
-Bath or wipe down and change into PJs

• Dim lights, play soft piano music
• Top up feed
• Settle with swaddle and into bed. Dummy if needed (eg if he's sucking me but getting frustrated each time milk comes out, yet crying and showing feeding cues when I pull him off).

At first we were doing the bath at 9, as baby was falling asleep for their long sleep at 10. Now he's 3 months and has been falling asleep at 8:30/9pm so we do the bath at 8.

My daytime nap routine is like this:

• Watch for tired cues (yawning, rubbing face, been 1-2 hours since he last slept).
• Draw the curtains and make the room darker.
• Swaddle, dummy, cuddle. Once settled and eyes are closed, I place him down in the cot or bouncer, depends on which room I'm in as he will wake quickly if I leave the room.
• when you put them down leave your hands on them for a bit so they don't suddenly awaken with the loss of touch.
• stay close by for the next 10-15 minutes and re-settle by shushing, patting, or picking up and rocking if needed.

When we're out and baby's showing tired signs, I do swaddle, dummy, cuddle until he's asleep then place him in the pram or keep holding him, whatever's easier at the time (eg if I'm at lunch I'll just keep holding him).

So I do have a "routine" but it's not about strict times I do things, it's about doing the same things each time baby is tired so they learn to associate them with sleep and settle easier.
Used to struggle a lot in the early days, but now if I pick up on the tired cues early enough, and swaddle and use a dummy, baby relaxes very quickly.

At that age I'd settle for making night and day different (I.e. night is quiet and dark, day is noisy and bright) and just doing the eat, activity (e.g. nappy change, tummy time), sleep routine. Then I'd add in sleep cues (pjs, milk, story, sleeping bag) and the routine will happen eventually.

I agree with all of the above. Our 5 week old DD has zero routine and we're just following her lead. The only thing she is consistent with is she's well ready for bedtime wind down anywhere between 7-9pm, but that's not something we're forcing her into. Go with baba's own flow for now and don't worry about what everyone says you 'should' be doing. That's about their expections, not yours.

My DD is five weeks and the only routine we have is that during day she sleeps downstairs with all the hustle and bustle of life going on around, dog barking, TV or radio on, me hoovering, etc. but at night we have dimly lit bedroom, a story and feed and then when she nods off, light goes off.

I tend to go to bed about now (she's just finishing a feed!) so we both come up at this time, get settled, she has her feed, and she tends to nod off during it so she then gets transferred to her cot and lights out. She's started sleeping longer stretches overnight than during the day now.

Otherwise she just gets fed on demand, out down to nap when she looks sleepy, and we go out and about at different times every day.

Stop fretting just relax and try to enjoy your baby
They’re not even old enough to develop a circadian rhythm outside of your body yet.
I can tell you from experience if having three children that it is entirely normal to have your life and “routine” upended by the mini mini human

@celebelly genuinely not being goady but you read your five week old baby a story?

Yep! Why not? It takes about three minutes and it's nice for them to hear the sound of your voice!

No routine for us either but tried to create a nighttime by dimming lights and turning tv volume down.

He also wouldn’t sleep in cot and only on me but over the course of 3 nights I kept putting him back into the next to me cot and it worked.

Another good thing was investing in a sling and wearing him during the day so I had my hands free to actually do something

Enjoy your baby they change so quickly

Ignore the people who say their 5 week old babies have a routine, they don't. They just happen to coincidentally do things at a similar time every day, it will change as the child develops.
I've found the wonder weeks app really helpful for stuff like this, if you understand more about what's going on inside their bodies and brains at a certain point, it helps you understand why they are sleeping the way they do :) Every baby is so different, you will find your way :)

Thanks guys! Doing the night time routine of no lights or noise and he does seem to know the difference between day and night. He's Co sleeping at the moment as he still screams as soon as I put him in his cot, but Co sleeping is improving I didn't have to be touching him last night so hoping to try cot again soon!! Really appreciate all your comments!! :)