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Desperate for help as I’m making things worse!

1 reply

BettyBoo246 · 10/01/2019 11:00

My 5 year old ds has recently started getting out of bed at night. It all began when he saw a scary Panto which we have now overcome but it now ranges from not wanting to be on his own to being scared of the dark. He’ll get up around 10-20 times a night. And it’s never a peaceful affair, he starts crying and screaming, which makes me start crying and screaming Sad I am making things 10 tens worse and I don’t know what else to do, I say some horrible things that probably just make him feel even more scared and unsafe, things like he’lol have to go and leave at grandmas or daddy can’t leave here anymore as he keeps waking him (dh has to go work at 4am) I really have tried being nice, talking about his worries and reassuring him but after a few nights it all reverts back to this horrible screaming at each other. I hate that he sees me like that and last night I was crying again pleading with him to stay in bed, he told me to stop crying for god sake and he wanted his real mummy back Sad I am heartbroken and desperate for help. I do have an 8 week old dd so I do believe this and starting year 1 at school is all contributing to his anxieties/insecurities, I just feel out of my depth.

OP posts:
beckieperk · 10/01/2019 14:29

My ds wasn't quite as bad as your lo. However, at 7 yo we occasionally get a night where he has "tummy ache!" He has admitted he's scared of the dark so I got him a Fortnite night light, which has helped, so far.
Other things which worked for us, you may have tried all of these, but here goes -
Reward chart
Gro clock
Bribery (ie 50p for each night He stays in bed to be given each morning, or whatever you can afford!)
Security blanket (might be too late??)
Favourite teddy/toy in bed beside him.
More bribery.
Good luck. I feel your pain with the lack of sleep, but I'm sure you probably know that the shouting will probably make things worse as you're giving him more things for his little brain to worry about. Try and stay calm....I know it's easier said than done....if necessary just take him downstairs or wherever to try and calm him?? It's really hard. I'm sorry you feel down about it....try not to beat yourself up....we all say things we don't mean sometimes I'm sure. Good luck.

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