Breastfeeding to sleep problems-I'm a human dummy!

[MummEE2]

My 9 week old is using me as a dummy and it's getting a bit much. I am EBF and he was sleeping in his Moses basket when transferred up until recently.

I have always breastfed him to sleep.

In the past week he only sleeps in my bed (which I can put up with) but what is bothering me is that when he falls asleep as soon as I take my nipple out of his mouth he wakes up again and won't settle. I have tried stroking his head, putting my hand on his belly but he won't settle until I feed him again. And then-the same problem.

If I sleep with my boob out nipple in his mouth, in my bed he can sleep for 4-5 hrs at night straight which is great.

I am happy I can breastfeed BUT the situation where my nipple is used as a dummy is frustrating as I can never leave him when he is asleep and can't even put my boob away! This is for at night and day naps too. I have another child so it's not practical at all either.

I have tried giving him dummy numerous times but he spits it out. I have tried two brands of dummies but no luck with either.

Any advice of how to get him out of this habit would be much appreciated.

I breastfed both of mine and this sounds really normal to me.
It will pass.

A dummy is a plastic nipple, not the other way round. It will get better...just give it a few years! Neither of mine took a dummy or a bottle. He's probably going through a growth spurt and next week won't be so bad.

I plan to EBF my DS until he's 6 months old (if I can) as I'll be going back to work soon after then and continuing to express milk whilst back at work will be too stressful for me. Another worry I have is how will he get to sleep when he's at the nursery and at home then and I'm no longer BF.

I really wouldn't worry how nursery will get him to sleep. They're basically magic.

You have nearly four months before you go back to work, son will be different by then and fascinated by everything going on at the nursery, especially other babies. Bless.

He sounds perfectly normal for his age right now but don't worry, you won't be a 'dummy' mummy forever.

What JohnLapsleyParlabane said above is spot on about day nurseries.

My 10 week old dd has been exactly the same (ebf too). My health visitor suggested the feed play sleep method. We put her in her bassinet when she starts to show signs of being tired. She cries a bit but in 3
Days it has gone from 20mins to 5. I feed her as soon as she wakes up. The crying is hard and I feel like a monster but it's also working. The health visitor basically said we can try this with her now or when she's 2 and when she's 2 it will be a lot harder. May be worth a try although I can totally understand wanting to pick lo up when they cry. In just 3 days I've wanted to give in so many times.

Ps this has also meant I get some time in the evenings back. I have been going to bed when she does for the last 10 weeks driving my dh mad!

@Clarashan your health visitor needs to be reported - that’s awful advice!

I literally just came on here to post a similar problem. My boy is 15 weeks old and I can only get him to sleep by breastfeeding to sleep, this is for all naps and every wakeup (most wakeups he's not hungry as has just has a few sucks and goes back to sleep but if I don't offer the nipple he gets hysterical, almost like he's in a panic until it's in his mouth). He needs to sleep about every 2 hours or he gets irate but the only way to get him to sleep is breastfeeding so I feel completely trapped as I can never be away from him for more than 2 hours at all time. He will not settle at all with his dad which is upsetting for both of us. Every nap I am trapped under him as he wakes up if I try to transfer him. He fights sleep like crazy. I've tried white noise, sleepyhead, swaddling, leaving him for a few minutes to see if he'll settle, cuddling him, rocking him (have managed to rock him to sleep a couple of times but then he wakes up as soon as I try to put him down.)

I really don't know how else to get him to sleep. My parents will be having him when I go back to work and I'm worried he's going to end up permanently overtirred and miserable.

I've reached breaking point today and finally started the antidepressants I've been putting off taking.

FuchsiaG-sounds just like my LO, he also needs naps during the day every 2hrs and won't settle with dad. I leave him with my DH when I go to gym twice a week as I need a break (started that recently to stop me from losing my mind) but it's stressful for everyone as I know DS is most likely going to cry and not settle with him. He has expressed Breast milk when I'm gone but afterwards is still difficult to settle. I'm secretly dreading that my DH might tell me no gym as he's not managing with LO as he hasn't got boobs.

The weird thing with my LO is it seems to have got a lot worse this week. I hope it's a growth spur.

I don't think I can leave him to cry. I really can't bare him crying so go to him as soon as he starts. It might be part of the problem, I don't know, but his crying really stresses me out so I do anything to stop him. Generally that means BF him..vicious circle

Everywhere you hear breast is best but no one tells you of the struggles of baby being attached to you 24/7 not feeding, just being there for comfort

I hope it passes soon. How old were your LO's when it passed?

I agree I struggle with the crying. My dh works away 2 weeks at a time and goes back to work tomorrow. I don't know how well it will go with just me. I think she will end up back on the boob.

I agree I thought the health visitor was very harsh with her suggestion (she is also quite blunt) but I hate to admit it is working for us.

My ds was similar at that age, it doesn't last forever, 9 weeks is still so tiny and sleep changes a lot as they get older. Breastfeeding is pretty intense...its more than just a food source. My youngest is still feeding at 15 months at least a couple of times a day but we have pretty much broken the association with sleep. I can't remember what age it was that I stopped feeding to sleep as it was driving me insane but I remember making a conscious decision to use other ways of getting him to sleep that other people could do too...rocking, shushing, white noise, buggy...and then at 6 months we did some sleep training to help him learn to self settle better. For me at that stage, when the occasion allowed, it was a case of getting comfy with a drink and the tv remote and trying to embrace and enjoy the booby cuddles. Nights were hard at times and i did feel overwhelmed. I know its not overly helpful but I can assure you that it won't always be this way....keep trying to gently encourage him to sleep without a nipple in his mouth!