How do you get the willpower to say no to giving milk in the night?

[NotNowAudrey]

My son is 3 and in the day only breastfeeds first thing in the morning, mid afternoon (Was when he used to nap, he doesn't nap anymore but still has the milk) and to get to sleep at night.

BUT he still wakes me for milk through the night. Im determined to stop as I'm shattered, I have managed to get him to sleep without milk and I can do it, but in the middle of the night I'm so tired I give in way too easily!

He's still in my bed but going into a bed in his own room after Christmas so hopefully that will make it easier.

Besides just "get tough" which is easier said than done, any advice? I don't want to stop completely just stop the night feeding as he's flipping 3!!

Have you got a partner? I stopped the night feed by sleeping in the spare room and putting her in with him.

You’ll have to sleep at a friend’s house for a few nights so there is no option. Then tell him the milk doesn’t come at night any more.

Yes he sleeps in with me and dh. Thanks I think that's probably the way forward, me sleeping in another room/ house.

Just hard for my dh who has to work, although he's off for the next few days so might be worth doing that tonight x

I just offered him water when he woke up. Two rough nights, then he just didn't bother waking up any more.

I used to leave a bottle of milk by his bed to help himself at night

Just keep giving him a cup of water to drink. He'll get the idea in the end.

I would feed before bed but then tell him Mummy does not have milk in the night anymore. I was told by Health Visitor to offer cold water only in night after 1 year. It was hard first few nights but got easier and in 2 weeks child slept through night without waking up. I was told by HV if I carried on breastfeeding in the middle of the night I was rewarding child for waking up.

Try the book "nursies when the sun shines" its a story book for kids about night weaning. Worked for us but I had to read "milk" for nursies as DS doesnt use that word.

At 3 he is more than old enough to understand that you're not going to feed him at night. I'd discuss it with him in the day for a few days, and then do it. He doesn't need milk during the night. Massive kudos to you for carrying on, my dd broke me with night feeds by 2.5 and I ended up just stopping cold Turkey.

Thanks all. I totally understand that he didn't need it, and he's old enough to understand. It's just how I get the strength to not give in when I'm half asleep!

He wouldn't have a bottle of milk anyway he's never had a bottle x

Can he sleep in his own bed?

He's never slept in his own bed, always been in with us. We can't afford to get bunks with his brother till after Christmas but I will definitely be putting my foot down then. If I have to walk through to another room I'm more likely to be awake enough to reason with him than if I just have to roll over and let him nurse x

One method I've seen is plasters across your nipples at night time so theres an actual barrier. Might work? I used nail biting solution on mine but it did mean that she never asked again and I saw that you said you don't want to stop completely yet.

I've heard the plasters thing I might try that. Yeah I don't want to stop all in one go as it's a big comfort for him but also if I stop suddenly it triggers massive migraines in me x

He's a massive boob monster so I don't think it tasting horrible at night would stop him forever. Mauve I could give it a go and just tell him it tastes horrible at night time now x

My friend just recently told her son they didn't work at night anymore (she was pregnant and sore and tired). He said "awwwww" but accepted it - he's two. Another friend (which wanted to stop entirely) said that the milk had run out. Again, it was accepted. I think it's maybe easier if it's not a battle of wills and just a statement of 'fact' - sorry, but they don't work at night now/ only work when the sun is in the sky?

Good luck - we moved to bottle feeding for a variety of reasons but she still has a feed in the night so I can't offer any personal experience. She's small for her age and I'm fine with her having it but it's just the once and takes ten minutes so no great shakes.