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20 week formula fed sleep help!

8 replies

WinterCoat · 12/11/2018 01:59

I know of the 4 month sleep regression etc but my issue is not that 20 week old baby keeps waking (although that is an issue) but increasingly that she will no longer sleep anywhere but on me or my husband. I understand this of newborns and we did hold her all the time then, but around 2.5 months she became a champ at sleeping at night in her cot in our room, while still being held for daytime naps. Sadly as of last week she will no longer be put down at night for the most part. Some nights we get 2 hours of her sleeping in her cot, some nights absolutely nothing.
I cannot put her down drowsy but awake as she'll scream.
When she is successfully put down but wakes up within 10 mins, or when she wakes as soon as i put her down, I try to leave her til she actually cries rather than grumbles. At that point i pick her up and 99% of time, if it's not a feeding wake up, she falls back to sleep the minute her head lays on my shoulder. She will go from wide awake to snoring in a matter of seconds in this scenario
I can't cosleep as our mattress is very soft, nor do I want to introduce another sleep crutch at this age.
She is formula fed.
She is rocked in a chair and/or fed to sleep for each nap and sleep
She has 3 naps in the day and used to "go to bed" around 6pm, waking every 4 hours until 6 am when she'd go back to a play, nap type pattern. Those were the days!
I'm not going to leave her to cry but should I try pick up put down ad infinitum in the hope it works or do I just ride this one out?!
Please help us!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Shriek · 12/11/2018 02:08

Aw...she's only 4mths, I would say it will settle again. She's still very young. Assuming all else is well, her weight and growth, developmental stages reached, just ride it out.
This phase will soon be over and the one will arrive!

2childrenandout · 12/11/2018 04:39

We are having exactly the same issues! 20 week old formula fed but our little terror is a boy! We’ve had feeding issues (tongue tie and high palate) and I’ve always put his discomfort and wakefulness down to wind. Sleep is horrendous here now. Same as you, maybe 2 hours in the cot then just is held all night. I keep telling myself it isn’t us doing anything wrong. We have a 2 year old who was/is a great sleeper from 10 weeks. It better improve soon as 5 months of sleep deprivation is taking its toll 🙁

WinterCoat · 12/11/2018 05:03

Sorry you're having the same @2childrenandout. I suppose we just have to embrace the cuddles for now. Thank you @Shriek for your perspective.

My daughter has been sound asleep for the last 4 hours, albeit on me, so I know she can sleep long stretches (i thought regression was frequent wakings as they move through cycles of sleep?), I'm just curious to understand why the regression back to needing to be held when she was previously happy to sleep on her own for spells....

OP posts:
Srsly · 12/11/2018 05:06

That's the 4 month sleep regression for you! Ride it out or do some sleep training, those are your only two options I'm afraid. It's bloody hard work.

Shriek · 12/11/2018 15:11

I hope you manage to keep on top of your sleep today and tonight, you just have to do whatever you can to get through this bit. I missed out 'next' in my pp.
I don't know about sleep regression, but it takes a while to settle the nighttimes! It's easier for baby to resettle immediately when they are aware you are there. Without you, the normal cyle back to vague consciousness would be wakeful if anything bothering baby, like development type 'bothering' of clinging to mum for comfort.

Dorabean · 12/11/2018 15:58

How does she nap in the day, OP? My DS is 18 weeks and will nap in the crib...for 30 minutes at the most!! He honestly times it to the second! I've tried getting him into the next sleep cycle but he just can't do it, he can get himself to sleep when put down for a nap though?! He will nap on me for ages, but not in his crib! He's just started waking up a little more at night after being a once a night wake up boy!

WinterCoat · 12/11/2018 18:23

@Dorabean I just let her sleep on me in the daytime, she has 3 x 1-3 hour naps so as you can imagine I don't get a lot done. Blush. Like you, when I have tried to put her down for day time naps she wakes up really fast.

OP posts:
Dorabean · 12/11/2018 19:39

@WinterCoat it's hard isn't it. He will go down in his crib fine but will never sleep longer than 30 mins! I was letting him sleep on me for afternoon naps as he would sleep longer but I decided today to only let him nap in his crib as he woke up at 4.30 and wouldn't settle unless with me and I don't want to co sleep! We'll see how he goes tonight as he's had 5 x 30 min naps!

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