Help me get my bf,.co sleeping 9 month old sleep Dodger into a cot tonight

[AlpineButterfly]

Ds2 partially cosleeps. Currently on a mattress on the floor and I sneak away. His preference is to stay latched for a massive part of the night, probably enabled by me feeding him laying down.

We need to fix this.

Last night was so so tough. He's disturbing the toddler when he doesn't get his own way and it's by far the easiest to stay with him but I'm getting fed up of it and his sleep quality is appalling.

We have to start. I know it'll be a struggle but it can't continue. I just don't know where to begin. Any advice?

I finish work in just over an hour. Anyone have any tips?

Ha ha no! I sleepwalked into exactly the same position with my second (now 6 m) after doh f it with my first. If it makes any difference my older one has slept independently and like a log since she was 2-3 ish.

My eldest is awesome but my youngest is s nightmare. I'm inclined to blame it on the bf as it's allowed me to comfort feed

Hoping someone will be along in a minute with actual wisdom, but I have a cosleeping 8.5 month old, so similar position. He's currently teething, so I'm desperately hoping life will improve a little soon. We're trying Elizabeth Pantley's book at the mo - I can't bring myself to do controlled crying or anything, but DS requires a lot of help to sleep, so I'll check back to see if anyone has any bright ideas/stories about it all being okay in the end!

Don’t do it tonight - fireworks will disturb him and make it harder!
The only way I managed to break out of this was to stop breastfeeding- but mine were 18months-2yrs by this point! I was fed up of the comfort feeding broken sleep for us all! We just went cold turkey!
But if yours is still a baby and your not ready to stop yet then obviously this isn’t the answer for you! If I knew the answer I’d write a book about it

I had DD in my bed until she was 3.
BF for 2 years, then she self settled after that, but still in my bed.

I know how hard it is, when you just want rest and they dont

This thread is not giving me the answers I need I am ok with night wakings and feeds. What I'm fed up with is the comfort feeding and difficulty with DH settling him.

DH is able to put him to bed these days which is great they have no choice as I work evenings

Plan for tonight. I'm going to feed upon every waking/offer a feed and then DH is going to take over to settle him. No matter what DH will stick with it. Tonight was harder for DH to put him to bed and I think it's because last night overnight when he cried for long enough DH went and I came back.

We need sleep. I have 2u2 all day, work evenings and DH has exams in January to study for as well as working

We are going through this as well. We're planning to do what you are doing where DH takes the lead where possible as he's never been able to settle DD since she was born.

DH was able to settle DD in her cot for the first time tonight without feeding to sleep and we literally high fived each other (very very quietly ). DH is pleased as punch!

You're way ahead of us in this process and are doing well if DH can settle DS regularly. Maybe try the 'Pantley pull out' method to try to break sleep boob link. We are trying this too.

Thanks, I'll look it up. Baby was up almost hourly last night but the main thing I fed and then DH settled. He managed it every time. We're hoping to soon remove maybe one of the feeds but don't want to force that too soon.

DH is going to build the cot tonight as I think it'll be better than a mattress on the floor

This is us too. Comforting to know DS isn’t the only baby like this. Every other baby we meet seems to sleep right through or has parents who complain of babies who wake 1-2x in the night. DS (9 months) can wake almost hourly on a bad night or attempt to be latched on for much of the night.

I find it almost embarrassing now that his sleep is still so bad - or think we must be doing something very wrong.

Hi we are in the same boat, I’m so done with it and I badly need proper sleep. Some days I am a horrible person to be around due to being so sleep deprived. Feel so stuck and idea what to do

Naps are non existent too unless I take him out in the pram which I can’t rely on for every sodding nap as a) it’s pissing down today and b) i need to get stuff done!

I also think the bf/ cosleeping has got us into this mess but at the same time I treated DD the same and she was so much better. We co slept but she actually SLEPT instead of nibbling at me all night. She didn’t nap either though

I think you need to take it one step at a time, either stop the cosleeping but still feed him when he wakes or stop the all night feeding but stay with him (not sure how you’ll block access though).

We seem to be doing ok. The current plan is when he wakes I go in and feed. Once he's finished feeding, DH will go and lay next to him until he settles. We only had one extended wake up last night and three other shorter wakeups. He fed for all four wakeups. Needs to be remembered that I don't feed him before bed as I'm at work so DH has to put him down without a feed.

Four wake ups is an improvement as at least he's not latched to me all night. That was the killer. Although we're both pretty sleep deprived at the moment

Three nights in a row he's been up hourly. We're both shattered

Oh OP hope things get better for you! Hourly wakings are horrible, I know. Stay strong 

Thanks. Last night I feel was better. He was a bit less than hourly which is great but also he was a lot quicker to settle. I just fed to sleep and came away. He didn't object and didn't insist on being latched. We've been up since 5.30 but that's ok, that's expected. It was the human dummy I couldn't hack. My husband didn't have to settle him once last night