6 week old - are we doing this right?

[HanSpan1]

Evening All!,
FTM and have a lovely little 6 week old DD, i wanted to gauge your opinions whether we are doing things right or setting ourselves up massivly further down the line...

I know ‘routines’ dont come into play yet, but i’m after what new mums do with their little ones in the evening / bed time.

Ours feel very baby led still, each night is different, sometimes will sleep at 10.30pm others could he 1am!

She is only BF, she only goes to sleep after a feed then in my arms or DH’s,

As soon as she drops off at nighttime she goes in her chicco next to me, in her sleeping bag and we get a good solid 4-5 hrs sleep before a feed again.

During the day she doesnt like her moses in the lounge, as soon as i put her down she wakes and cries after 5 mins. So pretty much spends most the day on me.

Should i just keep doing what im doing and start changing things up in a few weeks??

It would be nice to think we could have our evenings back to eat together or watch tv together with LO sleeping upstairs.

You're weeks away from having a baby free evening. Routines come a bit later. Meantime, just enjoy your time with your baby! There is time enough for routine in the future.

Safe sleep guidelines are that baby sleeps in the same room as you (day and night) for the first six months. This is because they can use the sound of your breathing to regulate their own. It sounds like what you are doing is working for you so just keep going with it.

Congratulations and you are doing a fantastic job. You are getting some good lengthy sleeps.

Baby free evenings may be a while off yet, baby needs to be close to you while sleeping.

Sounds good to me. My DS started putting himself into a routine at around 12-14 weeks, as did most of my friends' babies, so you're probably not too far off things becoming more predictable. Baby should never sleep separately from you until they're over 6 months anyway. To be honest for about the first 6 or 7 months I went to bed with DS at 8pm every night because I was so shattered from getting up every 1-2 hours all night to breastfeed. I did feel like I never got to spend any time with my husband but it was only a temporary situation.

Sounds like you're doing well! If you'd like to get out and about more in the day or have hands free time, a sling can really help - a stretchy wrap like a moby is snuggly for small ones (and you can get second hand ones very cheaply on ebay or local selling sites), or ergobabys or tulas have extra hip support and will work up until toddlerhood. If you're not into the sling, have you tried the pram? It's a good age to get them used to it.
At night, does the sleepyhead fit in the Moses basket, or even on the floor in a safe corner of the room near you? It might help you have some couple time.
But if you're happy with the sleeping on you during the day, there's no need for any of this, it's a one off time, even if you have more babies you'll likely need to be up and about more. I wish I'd spent more time just snuggling up to my first, and am sitting here right now trying to do more of this with my fourth!
For gentle sleep tips, the No Cry Newborn Sleep Solution has some good advice on gradually getting into some habits that help sleep in the long term.

Thanks all, yes i totally agree with being in the same room for 6 months etc, what i was trying to say was ive been feeding her downstairs until 9pm/9.30pm whilst watching tv, then bringing her up after shes gone into a deep sleep and go to bed myself, or should i be bringing her up at 7/8pm which will then become her ‘bed time’ etc.
Some people say at this age its , bath, feed and bed between 7-8pm ish then into a dark room with white noise etc to get her to aleep.... whereas we seem to be just going with the flow on what feels right, and i dont know if its going to bite us in the backside down the line.

Its good to hear that they will naturally find their own routine in a few weeks,

@stuckforthefourthtime yes we have a moby sling and an ergobaby lent by a friend. I do alot of classes during the week with her to get out the house and she goes in the pram, i think shes fine during the day, we aim to have her sleep more than 3 hours during the day, if not shes wide awake staring around the room, or playing with her

Just do what works for you. Given the current, rather good from yours and baby's pov, spacings, going up with you at 10:30 up for a feed at 2am, then sleeping until 6 or 7am sounds like a pretty good night.

My first didn't settle into an early night routine until he started nursery. Great for us because it meant we could do our shopping on a weekday evening and avoid the hell of Saturday in a supermarket.

DS is 19 weeks and sleeps beautifully all night, however he has no enforced routine, he's found his own. He naps about 3 times a day for half an hour, usually on me or in the pram but I've started putting him in his own room in his big cot for his evening nap (with me in room too). He is then up and alert until about half 10, there's no way he would settle before then as he's so chatty and active. I'm lucky as our living room and bedroom are on same floor so DH and I move his crib into the living room if we want to stay up and watch some telly then carry it through when we're ready for bed.

Part of me feels I should be trying to get DS to bed earlier but the other part of me thinks that he's still little and there's no need for at least 6 months for him to be up early (he wakes at half 7 for a bottle then will doze until about 9.30) and he's maintaining his own sleep needs. When I start wearing him and getting him up for breakfast then I'm sure everything will fall into place.

I think what you're doing sounds fine, though evenings to yourself are quite a way off! I'm a big believer that you can read all the books and plan all the routines, but your baby doesn't know he/she is supposed to be following a certain way so go with the flow.

Sounds good to me!
Really so lovely by as you all get s much sleep as you can you can’t get it wrong. Some people will tell you that napping on you makes rod for your back. I’m sitting here holding my 6 month old for her nap. I’m never so busy that I can’t cuddle her! She won’t want me to soon enough x

I am just massively jealous of the 4-5 hours sleep!! My babies have never given me that much before 5 months!! Well done you!