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45 minute wake up after bed

17 replies

Catheroooo · 01/11/2018 20:08

Since 5 months, my DD who is now 10 months wakes after 45 mins of going to bed. I've tried later bedtimes, earlier bedtimes, formuka she's bf. It makes no difference if she has good naps or no naps. In fact we had 5 glorious days a few weeks ago where she slept through, or at least slept til 2am when her naps were crap 2x30 mins(.
I'm at my wits end. I tried controlled crying, it never worked after two weeks.

She's a snacker, prob reverse cycles.

I'm broken. I've had enough. I'm now thinking it's silent reflux. She has drooled since birth and sucks her hand . I thought teething but only 2 teeth so far. I hear those can be silent reflux symptoms...?
She used to only wake 2-3 times a night, now it's 3-4, maybe 5. She always wants boob. But she used to do a 4-5 hour stretch but now it's 2.5-4. Have wakes at sametime each night.

I catch her burping sometimes then hiccups. Sometimes when I feed at night I can hear her tummy. But she doesn't cry in the day, not really arching her back.

In at a loss. 5 months of this nearly ever night.

She doesn't settle easily at new houses, won't sleep for longer than 30 in the car,45 in pram. Despite being tired.

What is this?! No one seems to have heard of this let alone experienced it. I'm so worried if I give her antacids and she hasn't got reflux then I'm doing damage to her little tummy. But I'm out of ideas. This too will pass is wearing thin at over 5 months with no change. Has anyone had this!?!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Catheroooo · 01/11/2018 20:09

Oh and her dad is on antacids and it runs in his family.

OP posts:
Catheroooo · 01/11/2018 20:14

I shoukd sat up until 5 months we co slept. But just before 5 months she started waking hourly and I lost my mind.

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30birthdayholiday · 01/11/2018 20:17

Yep, I've had this, she was teething, pain relief in the form of Anbesol worked a treat and she went back to her usual sleeping routine. Calpol/ ibuprofen-would work too.

Catheroooo · 01/11/2018 20:21

You had it for 5 months or more?

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Catheroooo · 01/11/2018 20:22

Our usual sleep routine is this? I've tried ibuprofen etc, she was on piriton for a cough and even that didn't help.

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Mummyshark2018 · 01/11/2018 20:50

Can she self soothe? Sounds like she's waking up after a very short sleep cycle and not getting into R.E.M. sheds becoming more aware of her environment, cause and effect (eg when I wake up mummy comes with boob etc). Have you tried sleep training methods?

Catheroooo · 01/11/2018 21:16

Yup... lasted 2 weeks and got no better. Cried for up to 2 hours.

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crazycatlady5 · 01/11/2018 21:17

Mine was the same - it sounds like you have a high needs baby. She is 21 months now and it’s much better. Hang in there x

Catheroooo · 01/11/2018 21:24

She's pretty good in the day. Doesn't get upset, Can be left to play independently. Is ok ish in the car and pram, just won't sleep. Stays at nursery for 5 hours 3 days a week and enjoys it. Likes being left at Grandmas for a few hours in the day. I just can't work out this 45 minute wakeup after bed. She can nap for 1.5 hours. I'm being forced to leave her for a birthday night out this weekend. I know she'll wake. I woukd love to leave her as pretty sure I'm going bananas being tied to the house but how can I leave her knowing she wakes up. When does it get easier? I'm at the point where I think sometimes it would be easier to be dead. I'm not pnd, just so tired and can't see how this gets better.

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StinkySaurus · 01/11/2018 21:36

I’m in a similar position with my 8 month old. She always wakes after 30-60mins of FINALY falling asleep. And then wakes every 2 hours after that. Tbh after the first wake up I now give up and just bedshare. Not ideal but I feel much more rested and the wake ups are typically shorter.

I try not to think too much about the future sleep wise as it’s too overwhelming to think it could be years until I get a decent stretch of sleep. So instead I try to focus on the happy moments and not talk about sleep with anyone unless I know their baby struggles as much as mine as otherwise it just makes me sad and stressed.

I just wanted you to know your not alone. Hopefully you are having a better night tonihht Flowers

NotSoThinLizzy · 01/11/2018 21:40

My wee one is 13 month and still doing this. He's on ranidatine and it dosent make a difference. Trying to see someone about getting something else

Whatamuddleduck · 02/11/2018 09:35

My dd often wakes 45 mins after going to bed. She’s bf and if super tired (I’m looking at DP for manic play at bath time!) doesn’t feed enough before falling asleep. I pick her out and try to feed from both breasts, which involves waking her with burping in between. She will usually then sleep for 3-7 hours.
If you think it’s reflux go to GP to discuss.

NationalShiteDay · 02/11/2018 14:33

My 5mo is exactly the same. Has been from 2 months. I've no idea why. They do the same things you describe but I hadn't considered silent reflux.

They've definitely reverse cycled and I had to work hard to sort that. I feed every two hours day and night. Hasn't really helped with the sleep but they've stopped dropping centiles at least.

I wish I knew what the answer was 😢

Catheroooo · 02/11/2018 17:10

Saw the Dr today and she dismissed reflux, perhaps @crazycatlady5 I should accept she is high needs. When did sleep become easier for you? She used to be ok-ish. After the 45 minute wake, I could get 4-5 hours. At the mo I'm lucky to get 3.

Argh I love her so much and she is amazing with what she learns everyday but the nights are so long. Running up and down the stairs all evening my partner and i get no time. Then after I've settled her in the night, I want to cry knowing I'm only closing my eyes for 2 hours. And then other friends with babies who sleep don't get it. They think I should be leaving her for an evening, or sleep training her.

And then there's the fireworks tonight. The village show is literally 200 metres away.... no white noise is going to cut it tonight.... and I can't even get drunk!!!

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DameSylvieKrin · 02/11/2018 17:21

We used the gradual retreat method as it seemed kinder than CC (which anyway didn’t work) and we went from 8–12 wake ups to 2 the very first night, she now sleeps 10h. We did it at 7 mo and again at 11 mo because of separation anxiety. It takes 9–12 days but there should be an immediate improvement.

Mrsharper88 · 02/11/2018 17:26

Hi OP, sorry you're having a hard time. I know your dc wakes and wants the boob but have you tried persisting in getting her to take a bottle? If she could be comforted by a bottle then perhaps her dad could settle her at night leaving you to get some much needed sleep.
My children have been crap sleepers and the best thing for me was sharing the load with my DP even if it's just for a chunk of the night so I can sleep for 4solid hours. It's amazing how much better you can feel after some solid sleep.
Try to remember that it won't be like this forever, I know from experience that it can just change overnight and the worst sleepers can become great sleepers. If things don't improve naturally it might be that she is ready for sleep training when she's a bit older.
Xx

TinaTeaspoonsBellybutton · 02/11/2018 18:21

Your post has struck such a chord with me. My boy slept so well until 4 months and then overnight he became a nightmare. You can only tell yourself it's 'just a phase' for so long until you're so sleep deprived and the months have dragged on that you know it's not just a phase.

For us it was 20-25 mins into bedtime sleep that he woke up. Every night. He would then wake every half hour ish until about 11pm when he'd finally go for longer stretches (sometimes). I tried so hard to keep his naps good so he slept well in the day, but this made no difference to night. He was also delightful in the day and showed no sign anything was wrong.

However he wasn't a great eater and moaned a lot when he did eat. At about 11months he finally ate some pasta and shreddies and was very sick, and immediately following a wheat free diet he suddenly started being interested in food and is a wonderful eater now. Anyway I'm not suggesting wheat is an issue for you from what you've described but whilst I was researching food intolerances I happened across some studies concerning dairy and poor sleep. It seemed so similar to our situation (no other symptoms but terrible sleep) that we also cut out dairy and within a few weeks his sleep was improving and enabled us to try the gradual retreat method of sleep training and he began occasionally sleeping through and no longer waking 8+ times each evening. Since then teething/illness/holidays etc have set us back several times but he occasionally sleeps through and now sleeps for long chunks.

He's now 19months and I'm trying to wean him totally off breast at the moment using Oatly which he's had as an alternative now for about 10months but our local supermarket hasn't had any in stock for a few weeks so we decided to try cows milk and see what happened. He loved drinking it, happy as ever during the day, but dear god, the last 3 nights have been horrendous. Up every 15 mins all evening and rolling squirming, it's been hell. So seems as though dairy is still causing big issues. I made a trip to another shop specially to stock up on oatly today!

Sorry for length of this post but something to consider. Prior to the dairy/wheat changes we were tearing our hair out and beyond exhausted so I feel your pain. This may be no help but something to consider?

Incidentally looking back my mum reckons I had the same issue because I was also a horrendous sleeper, she cut back on dairy for me because she noticed it gave me eczema but never cut it out entirely. So an interesting observation.

Good luck!

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