Almost 5 month old, terrible sleeper, please help!

[Haz1516]

Please help, I’m so tired and just seems to be getting worse. My 20 week old baby used to be an ok sleeper until around 14 weeks, he used to sleep a 6 hour stretch and then maybe wake up a couple of times more for a feed after that. But now he just seems to be getting worse and worse... he won’t nap for more than 40 minutes and am lucky to get a 3 hour stretch at night. He is breastfed and won’t take a bottle; I’ve bought him a sippy cup to try him with when he gets a bit better with his hands.

Anyway, he falls alseep in his bed at night with his dummy and me next to him shushing, it usually takes around 20 mins with not too much fuss. I used to feed him to sleep when he was smaller, but as he got bigger it stopped working. He’s never been a comfort eater. After he goes down then 3 hours later he’s up again. I can’t get him to settle again without a feed or he just cries and cries. After that he is up every 1-2 hours all night. Occasionally I can get him to settle back with his dummy, but most of the time he demands a feed. In the last couple of weeks he’s also started waking for a long period, about an hour around 3/4am and not wanting to go back to sleep... he’s also started often pooping in this time. Last night he was up for an hour and 20 minutes until 5:30 and pooed during that time. On the advice of my mum and MIL we tried giving him some baby porridge to see if it made any difference to his waking, but it’s made none.

Is this just some horrible phase that I have to get through or else what could I be doing to make things better?

Thanks in advance.

Sounds normal. It’s exhausting. Some babies sleep better than other last but you’re not doing anything wrong. Introducing solids won’t help-it’s an outdated myth.

Check out four month sleep regression, Sarah ockwell-smith has a good article. It will pass. There is no evidence that giving solids helps babies sleep better (and anecdotally I found when we introduced solids at 6 months it made sleep much worse as was pooing at night). When my baby was little and wouldn't go back to sleep but wasn't distressed or crying I'd bring her into bed with me (following all safe sleep guidelines) and just lie there being boring and she'd get the message

Op your baby sounds like mine! She's 5 months, always been a crap sleeper but does the same at night as your baby. She'll be awake between 3-4 some nights for no apparent reason, sometimes she'll have a poo sometimes a feed. I try and ignore her (sounds horrible I know) but I don't want to engage her at that time. I am hoping that this is a phase and she will get better and she grows up and matures. Until then, I too am shattered so you're not alone!!

Thank you for the responses, and good to know I’m not alone at least! I will look up that article about sleep regression. Everyone else I seem to speak to has babies who apparently sleep well. He’s also screamed and cried before every nap time (always 40 mins) for the last monthish.

I mentioned the poo because I wondered if it could be a gas thing waking him up, although gas never seems to bother him in the day since he was really little. I try to ignore him too, but he’s in a next2me sleeper and grunts and groans and will eventually cry, so I end up walking around in the dark rocking him for an hour until he eventually falls back asleep. My OH wants to put him in his own room. I also wondered if it could be teething? He’s very dribble and often has rosy cheeks.

OH is away all this week so it’s going to be a tough one.

sarahockwell-smith.com/2017/07/24/the-rollercoaster-of-real-baby-sleep/

Just read this and another one by her, thank you for the recommendation, definitely reassuring.

My son was exactly the same from 14 weeks to 22 weeks, waking up 5 - 7 times at night. From 22 to 22.5 weeks, he slept much better and then it went down hill again. Am guessing he went straight from leap 4 to leap 5. Hang in there, things will change in the next few weeks and hopefully get better.

Thanks again for responses. He had two 2 hour stretches but otherwise up every hour last night, before deciding to be wide awake at 5:30 . Screamed before being out for naps as well again today. Things can only get better I suppose(/hope at least!)

You're not alone OP. My 5mo is the same. That chart in the article is remarkably accurate

I guess we just have to try and survive it.

I also started weaning at 20 weeks as he is EBF and won't take a bottle I need to not be his sole source of food. He's not sleeping any worse for it so am going to keep on with it.

Sounds like my baby at 5months old! Especially the pooing and hour long wake ups. I also thought solids would help but they didnt. If it gives you hope i got my first ever 10 hour stretch of sleep last night - he is now 6.5months so you dont have long to wait.
I found taking the dummy away helped (read this on mumsnet) it was one horrific night but since then he has managed to self settle when he wakes so although he is waking through the night and during naps he can now settle himself without me putting his dummy back in which means im getting a lot more sleep. Might be worth a try but make sure u have support the next day because that first night without it will be hell!