6 year old wont go to bed!

[MissSamantha]

Can anyone help me please i feel like im going insane, my 6 year old daughter hates going to bed, the moment you mention its bed time she kicks of when you put her into bed she is constanly up an down comes out of her room, she will not lay down an go to sleep, she goes to bed at 8 an wont fall asleep till like 2am an still wakes up at least once during the night an then gets up for the day any time from 6am. By the time she falls asleep im totally nackerd an go to sleep my self. I feel drained, im starting my job on Monday but an all ready feeling like i wont cope due to lack of sleep. Ive literally tried everything, lavender baths, lavender sleeping stuff in room an on bedding, a movie, hot chocolate, a story, ive laid with her an nothing is helping all she does is scream an cry shes not tired an she dont want too go bed. If my partner trys helping she just kicks off an screams for me.

Has anyone else had this problem? If so please give me advise

Please no judgemental comments im all ready feeling like a failure

Not any advice Hun but you are not alone. I just do my daughters bedtime routine with her and then let her crack on playing in her room until she eventually goes off...
It's frustrating but I just go bed myself now sometimes she'll come try and get me up out of bed (I'm not asleep just reading/social media on my phone etc. But under the covers). But I just say "mummy's tired its sleepy time you need to go to bed too etc.... Eventually she falls asleep, then either she's up with the larks or refuses to get out of bed...

Thats the thing my daughter wont stay in her room she literally comes into my bedroom or front room where ever i am an starts screaming an hitting me. You put her back in to her room then she is straight back out again. I literally have to bath at like 2am when shes sleepin or ill never be able to get one. I tell her im really tired an all she says is well im not so ill carry on being naughty an getting up

Has she always been like that it has something changed?

Yeah tbh my DD is a bit like this. She is being referred for play therapy and support now. I think there is a level at which "normal" behaviour becomes "disruptive" at which point it's sometimes necessary to reach out for some help. Is she at school/ok at school? Is there anything driving this at home or outside it? Xx

She has always been like this. Ive even take her doctors so many times an they say its just her age, but this has been on going since she was 1 shes now 6 nearly 7

DD was a bit younger when we tried this & it nearly drove me demented but it worked. When she comes out the first time you say “ Time for bed darling” firmly then put her back into bed. The 2nd time you just say “ Back to bed” & put her back. The 3rd time you say nothing then keep going. I once reached 100 times but I stuck to my guns! This is a Supernanny method. I think DD may have been 3 or 4 but it might work with an older child. You have to be so strong though!

Nothing has happened at home or outside an she is perfectly fine in school. Doctors are saying it is her age an shes just a hyperactive child but surely the sleep shes having isnt enough?

Movies might over - stimulate her & I would leave hot chocolate for during the day as caffeine can keep you awake.
Could you do something nice in her room so she wants to stay in it more? Maybe go with her to choose some new bedding or pop some little fairy lights round her headboard?

I assume you’ve tried the usual discipline methods (you need to stay in your room quietly or xyz will happen/no screen/trip out/treat tomorrow or whatever) and follow through yet it doesn’t work?
Assuming you’ve tried the usual reward stratergies (stay in your room quietly and we will do xyz tomorrow/get so many stickers to earn a treat,etc?

Does she respond to rewards/consequences in other areas and it’s just bedtime she struggles with or are there other issues?

If you put her to bed later does she fall asleep at the same time or quicker/longer to fall asleep?

What if you don’t put her to bed, does she fall asleep on the couch or do you still have the same issues with her screaming/hitting you, etc?

Try to really wear her out - DD always drops off more quickly when she’s had her street dance class or gymnastics

Literally tried all the reward stuff an that reward one works with everything apart from bed. She got new bedding lights an bedroom stuff but still not good enough. Ive always had this problem with bed time. She will not fall asleep anywhere. I tried putting her to bed later yet its still the same thing. Ive been firm with her yet nothing.

Maybe you try to get her to bed too early. Children differ greatly, they aren't all ready to go to sleep early. Keep her up until she is very tired.

She has just recently joined after school clubs an some other clubs so im hoping that these wear her out a bit. I know children can be hyperactive but oh my god i never knew it could be this bad

Swimming! Literally always sends me and my kids off lovely. My Mum claims I've been an insomniac sice birth...

She has been asking to swimming lessons so maybe if join her up to swimming lessons an also take her swimming after school sometimes it may help

It's my favourite morning activity at the weekend, then my kids are chilled out for the rest of the day!

I've heard before "if they are crabby put them in water" so my elsest sometimes has an hour long bath in the evening!

This isn't normal, you need referring somewhere . You can't carry on like this.

In the meantime don't put her to bed until a lot later as she has got in the habit of not being tired or falling asleep when she gets in bed.

You need to overhaul bedtime and you need to relax and give a different vibe as I imagine you must be pretty stressed when it comes around.

If it was me I'd get a tv in her room to give yourself a break but that probably isn't the answer really xx

My Ds has Adhd so get how exhausting it is.

If I was you I would take 7 steps back . The idea she is going to get into bed at 8 and go to sleep isn’t going to happen right now

No technology including tv 2 hours before bed. Supper banana ( contains melatonin) plain milk.

Aim 8 pm in bedroom maybe half hour of playing game in room, calm game , stories , give her the option to look at boooks or go to sleep.

Does she want you in room if so look at moving chair technique.

A 6 year old going to sleep at 2am is not normal. Is there another go you can see . Sleep chart will help highlight the point

My son is very similar and I was becoming worn down with it all and I would have done anything to sleep so I tried guided meditation with him - kids version on YouTube and it worked he relaxes and settles down I do stay with him whilst it’s on but leave once sleeping. He’s still being referred but I am sleeping more hours and feel slightly less deranged
Hopevyou can sort her out soon

She has a tv in her room but it literally dont help. Tonight im here layin on her fall waiting for to fall sleep, i have work at 9 am im so tired. Im literally just crying. We have been out all day today from 11am to 8pm i really dont get how shes not asleep all ready

I have no family in London where i live. My so called friends fucked of when i got pregnant so i literally have no one apart from my partner(not the childs father)