Devil worshiper or overtired baby?

[ThoughtAboutThisTooMuch]

Woman on the bus called me a devil worshiper cause my baby was screaming…

TLDR; how can I get him to not need my breast to fall asleep?

I have a 3 month old who I’m struggling to get down for naps. He’s currently BF but had tongue tie and I had (have?) low supply so initially had to top up with formula on HV recommendations. He used to feed essentially constantly, but this has gradually decreased to about 30-40minutes each feed and he can go 2-3hours between. He always slept pretty well at night, waking once between about 9pm-5/6am but in the last 2 weeks has started waking twice between those times (around 12ish and 3am). He also always spit up a lot and seemed in pain after feeding so have been on Gavison for about 6 weeks now which seems to help. For the last 3 weeks however he’s had snuffles and the occasional green poo. I assumed it was a cold but when it didn’t go away I looked into other issues so the last 5 days I’ve cut out dairy and the green poos have stopped (could be coincidence though).

My issue is that he seems to need my breast in his mouth in order to go to sleep. Have tried to do the whole sleepy but awake thing, but he just screams and screams (I don’t have the heart for CIO) and I think I’m still worried that I have low supply and he’s hungry so always give in, but even if he then does go to sleep he, of course, wakes up after 20-45mins screaming and still tired. Used to sleep in sling but now rarely does and only if I feed on the go. Used to take a dummy but now splits it out.
I’m finding it very hard to put him on an EASY schedule like I did with my first as I have an older son (3) and we’re in the process of selling so often need to be out and about sorting things.
I’d be happy to switch to FF but because of the disappearance of green poos I’m a bit worried that if he was daily intolerant than going to formula would make it worse. Also one of the reasons I pushed to get BF sorted was that he spit up less than when he was given a bottle (of either FF or EBM).

He seems to spend a lot of the day screaming, I’m assuming because he’s overtired. In between times he’s happy, smiling and laughing so I don’t really think he’s the spawn of the devil, even if he is a red head

Feel like I'm losing it slightly and have a couple of break downs and cry most days before pulling myself together.

Willing to try anything, anyone have any advice?

I think you are doing a great job: and it does sound like dairy allergy. It can take 6-8 weeks of being completely dairy free to see a change. If after that time baby is still struggling look in to avoiding soya (50% of babies with dairy allergy have soya allergy too).

It doesn’t sound like low supply, it just sounds like baby was trying to up your supply and sooth the pain of reflux and dairy allergy (reflux and dairy allergy often go hand in hand).

A 3 month sleeping 4 hours at night is great (I wish my 17 month old did!). I also wouldn’t worry too much about needing boob to sleep at this age: I think when baby is ready to try going to sleep “drowsy but awake” (the Holy Grail of parenting) you will know, probably around the time they can go longer between feeds.

Thanks for your very kind reply! I didn’t realise it would take so long before I saw a change. I gave in earlier and gave him a bottle; big mistake, he hasn’t stopped crying from about an hour afterwards since. Ok, i’ll stick to the dairy free for another few weeks and stop worrying about feeding to sleep. He’s only had 2 x 30min naps for the whole day though; I really wish he’d sleep more for both our sakes!

I thought you were asking if your baby was a devil worshipper or over tired, was going to say it's devil worship every time.

I'm sorry I have no actual advice as my devil worshipper, I mean daughter, still hasn't slept through the night or stopped crying at nothing.

...she's 6.

Don’t worry about giving him formula: it’s probably good in a way because it’s shown you it probably is a dairy intolerance issue. In fact some Drs recommendation is to go dairy free and then do a “dairy challenge” to see if it causes a reaction so you are basically doing that: you are ahead of the game ;)

My son is a rubbish sleeper, but it does get easier and in a few months you will realise he has his own routine that’s happened all by itself. It’s good to do some sleep stuff (consistent routines, calm/dark bed time etc) but don’t get hung up on it. My son was naturally a night owl and even when he got in a routine he didn’t want to go to bed early (it used to be very late, and gradually got earlier as he got older and more active.

I know you read of all these people saying their babies sleep 7-7 from 4 weeks blah blah blah, but it’s just luck of the draw. So many people on here do the same thing with 2/3/4 children and have some that sleep and some that don’t. We sadly got the ones who don’t sleep, but it’s just a sign or character of you ask me :)

Lol xTinkerhellx, my eldest only cry’s at really important stuff like it didn’t rain enough to make puddles or his sausage broke.

Thanks Ely, I guess I keep comparing him to how my eldest was at this stage so keep thinking i’m doing something wrong. Also feel I should know better since he’s not my first. Thanks for the reassurance!

You’re not doing anything wrong and it doesn’t at all sound like low supply, health visitors unfortunately can be very misinformed when it comes to BF. I would go to a local bf support group or bf consultant to discuss any issues you may have. It’s totally normal for baby to need to fall asleep sucking, if you find it hard I would recommend trying a dummy. Sleepy but awake is nonsense in my opinion especially for babies that young.

Thanks catlady. Good idea about the bf clinic; will head there this week and see what they think.