Two year sleep regression, night terrors or something else?

[Gemstonemama]

I have a 23 month old DS who has been a pretty good sleeper from being tiny, but for the last 4 weeks has woken like a newborn. He's exhausted from this, yet can't seem to stay asleep once he is asleep!

We're so so tired, and at 4 months pregnant the lack of sleep is making me physically ill and my DH has to drive for his job. It just can't go on but we're just not sure what to do.

So as not to drip feed...

• His bedtime is 1930, he has a good routine of bath, milk, pyjamas, toddler massage, stories and song, good night and tuck in bed. He usually chats for a short while but settles to sleep.

*Before this regression, his wake up time was usually 0600-0630

*He naps every day for about 1hr 20 at 11am which he still needs, he doesn't cope with having this cut

*He wakes and moans, or sometimes screams in hysterics and won't be calmed. He fights us if we pick him up to cuddle him, he goes ballistic if we try taking him in our own bed, and he hyperventilates if we don't pick him up. Sometimes it's like he's terrified and not quite awake like a night terror, other times he seems fully with it and just really angry and wanting to get up (which we don't do before 6). He doesn't like having his back rub, and refuses a drink. If left he screams for me. This can go on for hours

*We won't control cry or cry it out, this may work for some little ones but it's not for us, there has to be another way (the times he has been left he gets even more distressed

*he loves his room, we have sensory style lights while winding down at night which he adores. He likes it dark to sleep, and went nuts when we tried a Gro Clock.

*life is stable at the moment, no changes, no new nursery, he's super happy and active during the day and eats well

*no sign of teething!

Last night we had the worst night ever and about 2 hours of broken sleep. It just can't go on, has anyone been through this, have any tips, or can just say there's light at the end of the tunnel?

Hi, this sounds very much like night terrors. I think ds suffers from these also. He’s 19 months old and will wake flinging his arms and arching his back and is simply inconsolable and the more you comfort him the worse he becomes. The only thing that helped ds was letting him watch his favourite cartoon (not the best method at 3am but bloody only thing that works.) He hasn’t had a night terror lately and seemed to have a cluster of them around the 18 month mark but they still can happen from time to time. We let ds sleep in our bed and this seemed to help him and he hasn’t had any since. The only problem is in strufglibr to get him to sleep through in his cot but I guess the main thing is that everyone gets some sleep so what ever works. Online the advice is to leave them as they’re not fully awake but in the middle of the night when I’m half a sleep myself I couldn’t differentiate whether ds was having one of those or generally crying so I must admit I pick him up regardless. Hope your little one sleeps better for you soon.

I’m struggling*

Thank you, it's been a few weeks since my post but (fingers crossed) he seems to have worked through whatever was scaring him - we've had two nights without terrors! I think they definitely were, and they were so similar to what you described with your little one. Hope you are getting some sleep now too!