Hi Everyone,
My son aged 5 years is slowly regressing into a terrible sleeper and I don’t no how i can get him to sleep on his own.
Me and the son’s mum seperated over 12 months ago and recently we have agreed that he will stay with me for 3 days one week then 4 the next, so essentially shared care. My son has not been a great sleeper all the way up until 4 and half years then into that he started sleeping really well with a routine. Since then his routine has been changed, where his mother had decided she wanted him in her bed and since then has moved into her parents where she shares a bed with my son.
Opposite to this I have the house my son grew up in with his own bedroom and of the idea that I always wanted him to be in his own bed and therefore has never slept with me.
The last nine to six months have started to become really bad with his sleeping, starting with him wanting me to stay in the room before he slept. To now where he goes bed around 7:30 - 8:00 and wakes within 1 to 2 hours. This then proceeds to wake throughout the night. I have since had a mattress in his room for me to sleep but that doesn’t work as he want someone to be next to him. Last week I woke up 32 times with him and at some points being is his room for 2 hours at a time, with no sleep as I am determined not to sleep with him.
The issue is he will wake up shouting out for me and come running into my room, I will put him back and then he wakes again at different intervals and will only go back to sleep if I am next to him.
I have spoken to a health visitor that has suggested going to a support service, but the issue is if I implement a routine at my home, he will be going back to his mums home and getting in her bed which will just destroy any work I have done. The mother is uncooperative and doesn't see it as a problem as she is sharing a bed with my son and sleeping.
I am looking for any advice as each week I have my sleep reduced to as litttle as three hours which is all broken and need to do something to change what is happening because this now carrying on in his daytime routine and seemingly effect his when he grows up.
He won’t go in another room unless I go with him or he is shouting me to find out where I am. This is why I think it may be seperation anxiety but woud like to here advise of others.
Regards
Chris