10 week old not sleeping during the day

[Babbaganoush]

I'm after some advice re my 10 week old baby as I'm really struggling with him at the moment. He is ebf and has always been a good and frequent feeder since birth and used to nap albeit often only for 30-60 mins at a time. I am not expecting him to be in any kind of routine at the moment, or sleeping through the night or anything like that. However, over the last week or so he seems to have lost the ability to sleep during the day. He just constantly fights sleep and ends up getting himself so overtired that around 5-6pm he just has a meltdown and it can take hours then to get him to settle. To give an example of a typical day:

Today he was 'up' at 7ish and was happy, smiley and chatty for around 1-2 hours.

1000 went out in the buggy to an appointment I had...he was very unsettled after his fed. He eventually fell asleep while being held and rocked etc at around 1100 - transferred into buggy and stayed asleep until 1300 - this was an unusually long nap!

And he has now been awake since then. We got back home at around 3pm and I've been trying to get him to sleep since then. He is clearly so tired, red bleary eyes and unsettled. He drifts off to sleep whilst feeding or being rocked/cuddled then startles and wakes up. Twice now I've got him to sleep in my arms, waited until he seems to be in a deeper sleep and put him down either in his bouncy chair or his basket and within 10 minutes he is awake again. If I try to leave him in his chair or basket he starts to cry. So I pick him up and start the cycle again.

Usually we can get him to sleep by 8/9pm and my husband then stays up with him while I get some sleep. He gives him a bottle of expressed milk around 11pm/midnight and then he feeds around 2/3am and again at 5am and 7am. He sleeps between these feeds.

Does anyone have any advice? I'm happy to be told it's normal and to just ride it out but I feel like I'm doing something wrong and I'm starting to feel frustrated with him because I can't relax or get anything done which I hate myself for.

Normal behaviour for a 10 week old I’m afraid. They like to change the goal posts often!

I found it best to focus on wake times with DS when he was younger, as he has never been one to just fall asleep were he is and by the time he was showing sleepy signals it was too late. If he is up at 7, at ten weeks I’d think awake time should be about an hour/hour and a half max. So by 10am there’s a good chance baby is overtired and will find it harder to settle.

I used to hold DS for all naps (unless in buggy/car) untill he was 5 months. Anytime I put him down he would wake in 20 mins. A sling/carrier is great, means you can get on with things if you really need to. Have you got a sling? I know you’re saying you would
Like to get things done but honestly, everything else can wait, this stage won’t lasy forever. Get comfy, get the tv remote and enjoy baby snuggles.

Thanks for your reply. I do have a sling yes but he's not a huge fan of it and often screams when I go to put him in it. Will keep trying though.

I think today is a particularly bad day. I just feel I have no time to myself whatsoever. Any time I do get is spent doing housework or trying to catch up on sleep. Which I know I need to get used to as it's part of being a mother but I would kill for an afternoon to myself!

My dd was similar around that age and I started to implement a bit of a routine, will he sleep in his moses basket?

I found dd needed a kip about 1.5 hours after she woke up and then again after lunch and sometimes a teatime as well.

It took a bit of time but dd def slept better in her moses basket/cot in a quiet, dark room. Holding her, rocking her, patting, singing etc just wound her up even more!!!

Might sound funny but i found that mine usually did this dropping of then waking when they needed a poo once they had done the poo it was fine they went off to sleep after the next feed. At around this age they had consolidated poos so it was one or two much bigger ones in the day and never at night. A wee bath might help them go and also to sooth them a bit.

I know how you feel @babbaganoush.

At 10 weeks youre still very much in the thick of it, trying to find what works and learn how to handle your little one. Breastfeeding is also bloody hard work. At 10 weeks I thought it was a good day if I got by without crying 😂 I promise you will get time to yourself again. At 10 weeks DS loved a tight swaddle. As PP also suggested you could try in a very dark room, white white noise? We still use white noise all night and for his nap.

Untill things settle just make life as easy as you can so that you can have me time when you get the chance. Eat easy food, only do what absolutely needs to be done in terms of housework. If baby takes a bottle of expressed milk then you could absolutely try having an afternoon to yourself and leaving him with a DP or a family member if you feel comfortable. Have lie ins when DP is off work. Get DP to do bath/bed routine right up to the point of feeding. Sometimes when DP got home from work I’d hand DS right over and just got sit in our bedroom for an hour while he did whatever, I didn’t sleep but just had time to lie and rest without being touched 😂

Mine was (is...) the same. He’s 19 weeks now and is starting to nap a bit better in the day but never for a long time only about 45 mins max. I use white noise all night and try to for his naps as often as I can, find it a lifesaver. I bought a white noise box off amazon and it helps DH and I sleep better too! I would also recommend a sling - DS hates being put in but once he is in and I start walking he drifts off really fast and I can get the washing or whatever done. I have now even mastered the art of going for a wee with him in the sling! I do try and have a bit of a routine as well so if we are at home I might put him in his sleeping bag for a nap cos that’s what I do when he goes to bed - I don’t know if that really makes a different but I will try anything 😂 hope he starts napping again soon!

My 2 month old baby didn't sleep easily during the day so I started taking her out in the pram for a good long walk at about noon every day. Rain or shine 7 days a week I walked for one or two hours, until she was about 6 months. I lost around 10lb in weight and felt so much healthier for being out of the house and doing all that walking.

By 6 months she was in a routine of sleeping after lunch and she would more or less just drop off in my arms and then I could put her in her cot at home if I didn't want to walk or go out.

Hi, just wanted to give you the comfort of knowing you're not alone in this...my 11 week old is exactly the same, apart from it sounds like your LO sleeps better at night! Babies are hard work aren't they!

I swaddle mine before I do any cuddling or rocking, then I put him down in his basket. It seems to lessen the startles and he sleeps longer. Before that he was miserable like you described.

I have a lo who is 9 weeks old and I'm finding that when he has been a wake for an hour and a half in the day he is really cranky so trying to pick up on his cues of yawning etc and then rocking him and using the white noise thing to try and settle him a bit more then trying to out him in the Moses basket whilst he's drowsy buy not asleep. Sometimes it takes a few goes but he getting down for a few naps each day. I have found that if I put him down asleep in his Moses basket he doesn't stay asleep long