6.5 month old doesn't self-soothe for naps

[S00zann3]

Hi,

I apologise for the long post. I'm after some advice and also some reassurance from more experienced parents out there! I'm a first time Mum to a beautiful baby girl. She is almost seven months (will be on 4th Oct), she's healthy and she's happy. My dilemma is that I struggle to get her to self-soothe for naps during the day. She usually has two naps of 45 mins to one hour in length and I have to rock her to sleep for 5-15 mins. She sleeps really well at night (is asleep by 7pm, only wakes once at around 5am for a quick feed and then is back down until 7-7.30am). She self-soothes at bedtime and during the night. At bedtime after she's finished feeding, I just put her down (awake) in her sleeping bag with two muslins that she likes to cuddle and white noise playing in the background. I leave the room and she's usually asleep within 15-20 mins. However, during the day it's another story. If I put her down awake in her sleeping bag with white noise and mobile playing and leave the room, she just lies there babbling to herself, kicking her legs and not falling asleep for half an hour or more. If I continue to leave her there, she eventually starts crying at which point I come and pick her up. I've tried putting her down earlier and I've tried putting her down later but nothing seems to work and it's so frustrating, particularly given that she self-soothes at night.

When she was younger, I used to swaddle her and she would actually fall asleep on her own that way but once she got too old for the swaddle and we put her in a sleeping bag and moved her into her own room (at around five months), that's where it all went wrong. I think she maybe self-soothed to sleep once about four weeks ago, but never did it again (if only I knew why!). She also won't sleep in the buggy so that's out.

Am I doing her harm by rocking her to sleep for naps? She tends to only sleep for one sleep cycle so maybe that's why. Is she getting enough sleep during the day? She's generally a happy baby and doesn't tend to get grumpy with the two short naps that she has. Has anyone else had this issue with a baby of similar age and if so, did they eventually start to fall asleep on their own? Or if you managed to 'wean' them off rocking to falling asleep on their own, how did you go about it?

Again, sorry for the long post. Would really, really appreciate any feedback and reassurance. Thanks guys.

DTs didnt self soothe for naps (or bed!) at all until they had just turned one. They napped in bouncy chairs, the pram or the car and at night we rocked them to sleep.

I think that's fairly normal, sorry!

How many naps is she having now, maybe she needs to drop one?

Is she showing signs of tiredness when you put her down for her day time nap? She might not be tired enough

She doesn't show any obvious signs of tiredness so I usually just go by the clock and put her down in the morning after about two hours and for the second nap after about 2.5 hours. Should I leave it longer than that? She's only having two naps at the moment and I start her bedtime routine at 5.30 as she likes to have a long bedtime feed (she's breastfed) of up to an hour so she's nearly always asleep by 7pm.

It's only a sleep problem if one of you is unhappy. If she likes the rocking and you're fine with it, I'd continue! Her night time sleep sounds great, and if she's not tired or grumpy I'd keep going with what works.
Ds1 was like this. As he got older and heavier the rocking got tricky, i tried all sorts of methods and eventually got in a sleep consultant because I thought I was doing it 'wrong', but the patting and shushing took bloody ages, we'd both be crying and he'd still only sleep for one cycle.
In the end I gave up and used to bounce on the ball with him in my arms or a sling, then he started sleeping in the buggy. Never really self soothed, but never needed to. With my next three I've also fed/rocked/slung/buggied to sleep (although dc3 was brilliant at sleeping and would drop off anywhere, I really do think that good sleepers are often born not made).

If you do want to make a slow and gentle change, the No Cry Sleep Solution is great, it takes some patience but fewer tears all round. If he's getting heavy for rocking, it can be worth trying a sturdy sling like an ergo or manduca - mine would often go to sleep in there and with some practice could then resettle in the cot. Added benefit of having hands free for jobs or mumsnet!