How to deal with 4 month old naps with a toddler around

[user1474565301]

Hi,
My 4 month old, quite understandably, cannot settle herself to sleep yet. I wish she would, but I think it's too early. She also wakes when I put her down.
My question is... How on earth do I help my baby to nap sufficiently, when there is a 2 1/2 year old in the house, who does not occupy herself very well and constantly is demanding my attention.

I'll add that my back has really hurt since having my baby, so I'd rather not use a baby carrier for every nap.

Anyone? Am I just going to have to accept that baby will cry herself to sleep for naps? That REALLY doesn't sit well with me.

I put mine in her room for naps. White noise & dummy. Too much going on for her to sleep or eat in the lounge, nosey bugger.

What I used to do was attend baby groups that finished just before nap time, baby would fall asleep in the buggy on the bus, and then they would sleep happily while I did chores or napped myself, or in your case have one to one time with the toddler.

Thank you for your comments. My problem isn't really getting baby to sleep. She is right in the 4 month regression and I fully expect to rock her to sleep every time at the moment. The issue is... How do I do that with a very energetic toddler around who is vying for my attention, especially when I am holding baby? I desperately want to give both the attention they want, but don't know how to do it. At present, I do rock baby to sleep, but because I'm chasing toddler around too, by the time I get to baby, she is always way overtired and getting to sleep involves lots of rocking, crying, squirming (so much she is difficult to hold onto). Is it like this for others with 2 of this age?

I think I'd do - nap 1 - on a walk to somewhere
Nap 2 - on way home
Nap 3 - while toddler naps if he still does, or TV if not
Nap 4 if there is one, ?baby carrier

I did a mixture of sleep in pram on way back from somewhere, push/rock to sleep in pram in hallway, get set up on couch with snacks/books for toddler and let baby sleep on me while read to toddler/watched telly with them, fed baby to sleep lying down and then ‘sneaked away’.
I did used to say to the toddler if I can get baby to sleep then we can do ‘xyz’ activity they liked that was difficult to do with baby. They were usually happy to wait while I put baby down but I know not all toddlers will do this.

I could've written this post. And just as I found a way that worked, one or both of my children would change and I'd have to find a new solution.
Things that worked-
Buying toddler a toy buggy so we would both rock/walk babies around the garden and sing baby to sleep (sometimes did this for the entire 45 min naps 😳)
I use the TV/chocolate for toddler A LOT now baby is in a routine and I can predict naps, gives me enough time to nip up and settle baby to sleep in cot. And I don't feel guilty at all
Car naps are good on occasion If toddler still sleeps so they can sleep together
I used a sling a lot in early days
I have been so frustrated so many times when toddler wakes baby, i remember trying to explain to a crying toddler who just wanted to play that if you let me put baby to sleep then we can play, which was only met with more tears and a more unsettled baby.

I too have an EXTREMELY noisy toddler (2.5 year old) and a 15week old, I have 3 options for naps. Typically the 1st nap (about 9.30am) I put baby in cot in the kids bedroom & get toddler showered, dressed etc so we're all upstairs, baby has lullaby music playing & dummy, then settle toddler downstairs with CBeebies & toys (living room safe & kitchen gated etc) whilst I shower & dress but obviously pooping my head in the kids room to check on baby & checking on toddler at various points.
Option 2: used for next nap if baby won't settle in cot, put pram up in dining room & rock / push to sleep. Usually keep toddler reasonably quiet with lunch / snacks depending on time of day.
Option 3: let baby sleep on me & watch film, read stories, play board game at least for long enough for either a shortish nap or until baby reaches deep enough sleep to lie on the sofa beside us whilst we play. I know that this isn't recommended but sometimes you have to do what you have to do.
In my (limited!) experience, once baby is settled to sleep not much wakes them.

Let the toddler sit down and watch a video on your phone while you deal with the baby?

When toddler was very little, I had a stair gate on my toddlers bedroom and would let them play in a toddler safe space while I put the baby down for a nap.

When they got a little older - maybe nearing 3.. I would promise TV time (strictly rationed!) for once the baby was asleep. They only got it if baby was asleep and it was turned off the minute baby woke up. So highly incentivised my older one to be quiet around the house for that short period!