Why doesn't my baby sleep EVER

[Ohb0llocks]

Anyone else just seriously close to losing their shit?

My son is 9 months old and he has NEVER slept for longer than 2 hours at a time. It’s all the damn night long and I can just feel myself getting more and more pissed off with him. I get no time to myself, no decent sleep. Me and my partner haven’t slept in the same bed for months. My relationship with my other son is suffering. I just cannot do it anymore.

Recently not even boob is helping him he just whinges and whinges, won’t even have a dummy anymore. My nipples are fucking raw and I’ve been trying to get him back to sleep since 1am.

I feel so ungrateful because I'm ridiculously lucky to have 2 beautiful boys but I'm so FUCKING tired and run down. I'm picking up every illness going and I've just recently had kidney stones and couldn't have any decent painkillers, and now a chest infection, migraines at least 3x a week, and terrible anxiety.

Very much struggling! Can't nap during the day as have another child. Good family support but I already lose enough time with my eldest as it is just with the demands of having a young baby, never mind shipping him off so I can sleep too.

Bloody hell OP that sounds like a nightmare. It's a cliche I know, but it won't be like this forever.

Gosh thats so draining, you poor thing!
You need to get to the bottom of this before you're completely burnt out!

I'm no expert but I am awake so let's see if we can work anything out for now.
So I've got 3dc (2 boys and a girl) and have had some similar issues with each of them in the past.

I'll start with a few questions...

Have you spoken to your HV or G.P about this yet?

Do you know if you have a homestart scheme in your area?
If so ask your HV to sign you up to find a match.
(I hear they will watch the kids while you catch a quick nap, as well as helping you get on with day to day household faff, admin, days out, watching kids during appointments etc)

Does he eat much throughout the day?

How often does he nap in the day and do you think he is getting enough exercise/stimulation?

If he does nap, does he prefer a quiet room or will he sleep through regular household noise?
(1 of mine can only sleep when it's noisy, I used to have to put a story c.d on loop and just let it play most of the night, now he's much older he wears a set of wireless headphones to sleep so we don't all have to hear his noise)

Will he settle himself with a bottle of
breast milk/formula/water.
(I know some would disagree with this but I found that 2 out of 3 of my dc slept better/settled faster and for longer with me giving them a bottle in bed)

Could there be anything else such as teething, reflux etc

Final question and this is a silly one, bear with me!

Does he have a nappy change throughout the night?

That was the trick with my dc3.
As soon as I would whip the nappy off the little monkey would settle and I found it easier to get him back to sleep after.

Hopefully someone a bit more sensible will be here soon to offer some practical advice.

Hoping you can get some sleep OP xx

Mine was exactly the same until 1 year 2 weeks old then he suddenly started sleeping 9 hours.
Some babies just don't sleep well .... and that is from Drs, midwives and consultants!

He has 3 meals a day, snacks, and 4 breastfeeds.

He's never had a bottle! I'm trying not to feed him at every wake up as I think he's just got into the habit!

He has 2x naps a day. One morning one afternoon, he never naps later than 3:30/4 pm and his bedtime is 7pm.

He's very active, into everything, crawling around all day and cruises on furniture too.

He DOESNT have a nappy change through the night so I will try that tonight.

During the day he naps either in his swing downstairs or in my bed and I have to bloody sit with him. Which is also a ball ache! Not a fan of noise/ we live on a main road I'm wondering if that's disturbing him. We have a bedroom situation though which I've outlined on another thread, basically there is my bedroom and 2 small single bedrooms. DS (he's 4) is in one and DSS who's 5 is in another (the nursery)

I've been thinking of trying the baby in his bedroom but that means DSS leaving his room (which has been the plan all along), but not sure where he will go. The original plan is that he'd have a sofa bed in the playroom but then that leaves that room out of bounds for DS and it's where all his toys are. The only other option is for DS to have the playroom as his room, and DSS take DS' room, but I worry as it's downstairs! We do have locks on all internal doors though. So id lock every downstairs door but his.

Oh OP I could have written a similar post! DS is 9 months this week and is also a terrible sleeper. On bad nights it's even more frequent than two hours. I also have a DD so like you, not much chance for rest! I don't have family nearby so it's just me and DH.

Like you, I just can't keep going with it. I'm so ridiculously exhausted all the time, it's shit! Plus my DD is going through a bad time with her sleep, which really doesn't help.

DS won't take a bottle or a dummy. So that's no use. He's also very active - cruising, into everything and never still.

I've tried not to feed him when he wakes but he gets so agitated and loud that I give in because I don't want him waking DD.

Naps are a mess, he's recently started waking after 30 mins and absolutely refuses to go back to sleep, no matter what I do.

I was thinking of calling my health visitor but I'm not really sure what she can say it do to help. I guess I should be trying harder to crack down on naps, but I'm just too damn tired to try, and as you know having another child to look after makes it all the harder!

Controversial I know but we did controlled crying with my son at this age. Worked in 3 days and he's slept through ever since.

I didn't want to but we'd tried everything else and I was hallucinating from lack of sleep.

Can't your DS and DSS share a room?